Chapter 451 - I’m Sorry

"Mom, come here for a moment." At this moment, Xian Zihao spoke at the door.

Zhan An frowned as she looked doubtfully at Jiang Ruolan, who was about to say something but suddenly stopped. She then looked at her son, got up, and walked towards him. "Zihao?"

Xian Zihao had one hand in his pants pocket. Since he didn't go to the company, he just wore casual and comfortable clothes at home. He glanced at Jiang Ruolan for a moment before walking towards the living room. His face was full of pressure.

After the bedroom door closed, Jiang Ruolan didn't know how Xian Zihao would explain it to Zhan An. But no matter how much he explained, she didn't have the energy to think about it.

If the Xian Family had considered Zhou Qingling's feelings at the time, then would she (Jiang Ruolan) had been more lenient towards the future and not forced herself to a dead end?

They had been cruel, but why couldn't she be cruel?

If she continued to torture herself like this, she feared that sooner or later, she will become a haggard person. Right now, she didn't look like a human nor a ghost.

Jiang Ruolan didn't know what Zhan An had talked with Xian Zihao. In short, after she followed him out of the room, she didn't come to see Jiang Ruolan again.

Jiang Ruolan sat alone on the bed, looking out the window. She closed her eyes before she took off the blanket, opened the bedroom door, and walked out.

The moment she walked out, she saw Xian Zihao sitting on the couch in the living room with the divorce agreement in his hand. It seemed like he was going to destroy it in the shredder.

She walked over and took the agreement from him. "Xian Zihao, you saw it, right? Are you sure we should continue living like this? Aren't you afraid that I'll upset your grandfather and reveal to everyone how ugly your father was back then? You are not afraid if one day I will take revenge? What can you do if all that happens?"

"Since you woke up, let's eat." Xian Zihao ignored the agreement she held in her hands and pretended as if he had not heard her. He turned around and walked into the kitchen. "I cooked a lot of lunch just now, but you're still asleep, so I put it in the pot. Now it's ready to eat."

Jiang Ruolan looked at him with a pained expression. She could not bear it any longer and quickly grabbed his hand. "Zihao! This is torturing me! Torturing us! Divorce is the best option for us! Can you let me go? I don't want to force myself to make a big scene in the Xian Family one day! I want to leave because I don't want to force everything out of control! I can be calm when facing you! But I can't guarantee what will happen when I see your grandfather and father! I beg you, let me go!"

Xian Zihao simply looked at her and didn't say anything. Then he slowly pulled his hand away from her grip and said softly, "Let's eat."

As he spoke, he went into the kitchen to fetch the utensils.

Jiang Ruolan slowly touched her stomach. In a split-second, her tears fell like rain.

'Xian Zihao, can you stop working so hard to make this relationship work?'

'Do you have to torture me like this?'

When Xian Zihao took out a plate and gestured for her to eat, Jiang Ruolan didn't move. She just stood there, looking at him.

"Come and eat. You haven't eaten since morning." He insisted.

"You're not going to sign it, are you?" Jiang Ruolan didn't look at the food on the table. She just stared at him.

Xian Zihao frowned, as if he really didn't like the topic. His voice also became colder, but with more determination, he said, "I said I wasn't going to sign it. I don't want to repeat myself for the third time. Come and eat."

Jiang Ruolan turned around and returned to the bedroom, not even sparing him a glance.

She didn't eat that day. No matter how Xian Zihao tried to coax her, she would close her eyes and lean back on the bed, saying, "Divorce me. Let me go."

Xian Zihao still did not sign it. Because of her stubborn hunger strike, he simply brought the paper to the shredder machine and destroyed it.

Jiang Ruolan woke up from her dream that night only to find that Xian Zihao was not lying beside her.

She was very hungry. She knew that the babies in her womb must also be very hungry. She looked at the time and saw it was 3 a.m.

She got up from the bed, thinking that even if she didn't want to eat, she should let her babies eat, so she went to find soy milk powder for her to drink in the kitchen. When she opened the bedroom door, she saw that the light in the living room had turned on.

Xian Zihao was sitting on the couch, alone. Just when Jiang Ruolan was about to ask where he had gone, she saw a drunkenness in his eyes, and his eyes were bloodshot. 

Xian Zihao just glanced at her and said nothing. His slender fingers unbuttoned his shirt.

"Is there dinner tonight?" Jiang Ruolan frowned, not knowing when he had left.

"Yes." Xian Zihao got up and walked to the bathroom. "I'm going to take a shower."

Looking at Xian Zihao's staggering steps, Jiang Ruolan felt extremely upset.

Why did her life have so many obstacles? She thought this kind of happiness would last, but in the end, she's still ended up just like this.

The hunger strike was only the way for her to force him to divorce her, but in the end, she still had to worry about his stomach.

Jiang Ruolan had wanted to make herself some soy milk powder to drink, but it had ended up with her making a sobering tea for Xian Zihao.

She placed the cup on the coffee table in the living room and thought for a moment. She didn't wait for him to come out of the bathroom. She went back to her bedroom.

Jiang Ruolan sat on the bed, leaning against the headboard. She couldn't sleep because once she closed her eyes, all she could see were the bloody dreams and the memories of her mother committing suicide. It's been a month, a full month.

Was her mother watching her from the sky?

Once, she didn't know anything, so she blindly chose this happiness. But now, she knew everything, so how could she continue to feel at ease?

Jiang Ruolan tossed and turned around on the bed, not daring to fall asleep again. Not long after, she heard the bathroom door open. She was hoping that Xian Zihao would see the cup, hoping that he would drink it.

But she didn't hear him take the cup. She only heard him come out of the bathroom and continued up to the second floor. He didn't even go back to the bedroom.

Jiang Ruolan hugged her blanket and said softly, "I'm sorry ..."