Chapter 23

***

I remember trying to tell Theodore about me just before he collapsed.

And right after I said the words, he looked at me and had a severe headache….Suddenly, a feeling of uneasiness struck me.

‘No way… Probably not.’

But the doctor cruelly put a wedge in my anxiety.

“I don’t know why, but His Majesty complained of a headache every time he tried to recall the lost memories.”

“His Majesty’s headache… Is it because of the memory?”

The doctor shook his head and continued. “In other words, as long as you don’t touch His Majesty’s memories, he won’t have any headaches.”

“…”

There have been several occasions where Theodore complained of a headache in front of me.

I thought it was simply the aftermath of the fall, but it all had to do with lost memories.

“It is probably in the same vein that his head hurts every time he sees Sir Yves. Sir Yves is a new relationship that His Majesty met during the half year he lost his memory.”

I remembered Theodore, who had a grim expression on his face, saying he had a headache every time he saw my face.

So, it wasn’t mean bullying.

Seeing me and recalling the memories of me became so terribly painful for him that he lost his mind. 

It was very sad and cruel.

“Then what about His Majesty’s memories? He can’t find them forever?”

“I don’t know about that either. Well, we have to wait and see. If you wait, won’t his memories come back someday?”

“No matter how he fell, how could only the memories of half a year be cut off like that?”

After the doctor left, I looked at Theodore blankly in the quiet room, speechless.

“Theo.”

His face, as he slept quietly, looked strangely distressed. I’m sick and upset, but I don’t know why he’s making this face. All I could do now was wait for his memory to return. 

I couldn’t even mention Yvonne’s name in front of him.

His body, which had fallen on the table and was quickly moved onto the bed. I wanted him to sleep warmly under the blanket, but his sleeping body did not move. In the end, I unfolded the coat I was wearing instead of the blanket and put it over his body.

“You’re not a fool who can’t even remember the woman you love.”

I whispered with a slight resentment, but he did not hear me as he was sleeping deeply.

I hated him for losing me, and his memories of never coming back were ironic. I thought as I gently brushed his dark hair, wet with sweat, clinging to his forehead.

“If you find your memory, will you be sorry for what you did to me?”

Even if you apologize with all your heart, I will never accept it until my heart is relieved.

Even if he misunderstood that I was with a strange woman, the cold image he showed me and the disappointment I felt at the moment he tore up my letter without reading it won’t go away.

“I will never forgive you easily.”

But as soon as I remembered his painful face a moment ago, my heart immediately weakened. 

“But you are the man I loved, so I think I can forgive you. So get your memories back quickly, Theo.” 

I whispered at his bedside, who had been sleeping for a long time, and then left.

***

The next morning, as I came to his office, he suddenly got angry and threw clothes at me.

“Whose coat is this?”

It was my coat that covered him last night as he slept.

I calmly accepted it and now I think I understand. Why was everyone reluctant to be his escort?

I thought that maybe all the gentleness he showed me was all faked.

“Personality Breaker……”

I mumbled very quietly so that it could not be heard.

“What did you just say?”

But he was sensitive and heard even the smallest voice and asked me with a terrifying voice.

“Oh, no.”

I glanced at his face as he was sitting at his desk with his documents and turned around.

He didn’t seem to remember what happened last night when he lost consciousness and fell in front of me. At this time, the attendant came in and told him.

“Your Majesty, the guests have arrived. Should I take them to the parlor?”

When he said there were guests, I pricked up my ears. Did he have guests coming today?

Could it be that he called the woman again?

“Go.”

Theodore nodded arrogantly and stood up.

As I followed him, I saw a familiar face coming to the parlor.

‘Benjamin… !’

It was Benjamin whom I met for the first time in half a year.

As if he had found me too, he nodded and gave me a small smile.

Then I found Katarina next to him, greeting Theodore, and I stopped.

Why is Katarina here? I felt uneasy for some reason. And my bad feeling was right.

“So, Ferdinand would like to propose again the marriage that was cut off with the imperial family.”

Marriage.

At those words, my heart sank.

Everyone except me was in a friendly atmosphere.

I stared at them blankly, alone with a bewildered expression.

Then, Theodore and Katarina both left together.

“Yves.”

Benjamin got up from his seat and came to me.

“Long time no see.”

He grabbed my wrist. I stared at him.

“Benjamin.”

“How have you been doing?”

“Well.”

I nodded my head and looked down, Benjamin gently stroked my wrist with his thumb. His contact, which had been natural in the past, felt particularly uncomfortable.

“What about you?”

When I asked, twisting my hand out, he paused and then answered with a soft smile.

“I don’t think I’ve been well. I missed you.”

I couldn’t even laugh at the playful words.

Ever since the talk of the wedding came out, my heart was pounding and I felt nauseous, so I couldn’t do anything.

I felt very sorry for Benjamin whom I had not seen in a long time.

“You grew your hair.”

“Is it strange?”

“No, it suits you.”

“….”

At those words, my expression clouded. Because the man who encouraged me to grow my hair didn’t remember me anymore.

“Yves? What’s wrong with your expression?”

Then Benjamin asked me worriedly.

It was when his hand touched my dry cheek. Suddenly, the door opened and Theodore and Katarina returned. Unlike when they went out, their arms were affectionately crossed. The friendly appearance made my face hardened.

***

Earlier.

Theodore found the woman (Katarina) holding his arm very troublesome. Fortunately, the woman is smart, and the conversation went through quickly.

[Let’s talk.]

[With me? Just the two of us?]

The woman’s eyes, which had been shrouded in subtle fear, gradually spread an interesting color as the words continued.

[I’m looking for someone. Yvonne Chernicia, the youngest daughter of the Chernicia family who disappeared 10 years ago. Her traces were cut off in Ferdinand.] (Theo)

[10 years ago, before I joined Ferdinand.] (Katarina)

[But if you put your mind to it, you can find it.] (Theo)

[Of course, if Your Majesty gives me the power to do so.] (Katarina)

The woman smiled leisurely, showing her greed.

[I want the Empress position. If you promise me that, I’ll try to find the person you mentioned.] (Katarina)

[I can’t give you that. I’ll give you something else instead.] (Theo)

‘How dare you, the seat of the Empress.’ (Theo)

Theodore openly rejected it as an unpleasant tone.

At his resolute tone, Katarina couldn’t mention the position of Empress again.

[Then give me Ferdinand.] (Katarina)

Katarina was greedy, but from the beginning she was willing to give up what she could not have.

[Your Majesty needs to help me establish my place in Ferdinand.] (Katarina)

[Okay. But I can’t do it until I deal with Ferdinand’s headmaster.] 

[If your Majesty gives you a little help, I’ll deal with Benjamin on my own.]

The transaction ended quickly.

[And Yves Llewellyn, I want to know about her.] (Theo)

At that request, Katarina made a mysterious expression.

[Yves Llewellyn is a woman…?] (Katarina)

[Didn’t you know?]

[No, I didn’t know. I’m just a little surprised because I didn’t know but Your Majesty knew about it.]

When they returned to the parlor after finishing the secret deal, the atmosphere in the room was strange. Ferdinand’s young headmaster was stroking Yves Llewellyn’s cheek, but when they saw people, Benjamin withdrew his hand.

‘What were they doing?’ (Theo)

Katarina said the two were originally very close.

“Benjamin was especially fond of her. He was so protective that I couldn’t even touch her. But I was a little puzzled when Benjamin sent the person he cherished so much to His Majesty.”

“Benjamin Ferdinand sent her to me?”

“I was really worried that Benjamin would put his woman there to be your escort. But for some reason, it’s suspicious that he’s in peace after sending her to the palace.”

As Theo recalled Katarina’s words, he felt even more strange.

It could have just been that something she came up with to slander Ferdinand’s headmaster and Yves, or it could have been something really insignificant.

But Theodore was bothered by it.

“I guess the conversation went well.”

Benjamin said as he looked at the two people with their arms crossed.

“Yes, Benjamin. Thank you.”

Katarina smiled broadly and chattered.

But Theodore didn’t hear anything from her.

He was worried about Yves Llewellyn, who avoided eye contact with a stiffened expression.

It was just annoying and uncomfortable.

No other words could be heard.

He felt like there was a thorn stuck in his throat.

Theodore said to Benjamin, trying to ignore the unpleasant sensation.

“I accept Ferdinand’s marriage.”