31 Love & Wrath

"You had your fun huh?" I heard a voice saying to me as I was closing the door of the infirmary.

He grabbed my hand forcefully and pinned me to the wall facing him.

"Rex!" I grasped his name being out of breath, "What are you doing?" I tried to speak but only whispers came out.

"What do you want me to do huh? What do you girls want?" He hissed.

"Rex..I.." I didn't know what to say to him I was so shocked.

"I told you everything. Wasn't it enough Bella? Wasn't it enough?" I could see the rage burning in his eyes but I could also see his pain.

His grips around my wrists were getting stronger with his each word, pouring his anger and frustration on me.

"I didn't say anything to you to make you angry did I?" I tried to speak but my voice was cracking in every point.

"Yeah, you didn't because you've been avoiding me from the day I told you everything! Why are you being such a bitch huh?"

"Rex, stop!!" I couldn't stop my tears this time. Jake's warmth was vanished by then. All I could feel was Rex's wrath around me. I was caged by him.

There wasn't anyone to free me from this cage, from the depression I was falling into. The feeling of being special, of being loved and the next moment you are treated like nobody, forgotten, thrown away. I didn't wanna feel that again.

"Bella why the hell are you crying?" I could see Rex's eyes becoming softer slowly his grip was loosening.

"Bella!" He said my name again and again,trying to make me look at his face. His fingers touched my cheeks wiping my tears. I could feel his cool breath, he was that close.

"Bella forgive me I didn't mean to be rough with you..I was just angry, upset because you are avoiding me," He said leaning onto me. I tried to free myself but grabbed me more closely.

"Bella please stop protesting," He put his fingers inside my hair and started kissing me slowly on my neck.

"Rex!!!Stop please! Why are you doing this?!" I was crying in pain, anger, being taken advantage of like this.

"Bella...!" I could hear the plead in his voice mixed with sensation he had for me. But I don't want it anymore. I don't want to fall in love again. I won't make the same mistake again.

"Fuck off!" I pushed him away with force this time which caught him by surprise. He grabbed my right wrists as I was leaving,

"I LOVE YOU!"

"And I DON'T!" My voice cracked as I tried to say it out loud. "Just leave me alone Rex, please."

I ran away from him wiping my tears. I don't wanna know who is anymore. I don't care if he's Ben or not I just don't want him in my life.

I heard a noise while I was running away from him. He must have punched the wall out of frustration.

I don't wanna feel again what I felt for Ben & I know I can never feel what I felt for him. My first love has made me miserable, weak, scared. I don't wanna break again. Not again.