Book 2: Chapter 4: (7)

Switching off my head torch, I hid myself in the shadow of the wall in the large room of the dungeon.

Very near me, lying face down on her belly, was the ‘lady knight’.

In the distance, I could hear Deet’s voice and the voices of two men, getting closer. They’re finally here!

「Sh-she’s dead, see. Not even an eyelid twitching.」

「B-but…! The colour of her skin… it really looks like she’s alive.」

That must be Klein and Barney.

「I thought we’d decided that she was dead? If we sell this dress armour and shield and divide the money between us, we’ll make a pretty penny. Come on, hurry up and strip them off.」

That’s Deet’s voice. Women are scary. She was playing her part incredibly well.

Based on what I’ve been told, that must be Klein. He finally put a hand on the shield of the fallen ‘lady knight’.

That’s when it happened. Suddenly, the ‘lady knight’ placed both hands on the ground and pushed herself into a sitting position, and turned to look Klein in the face.

「Klein…… Is that you……? Barney…… Is that you……?」

「Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Ria?!」

I bet their blood’s running cold. Klein and Barney both fell on their backsides.

In a hoarse voice, Barney said,

「Y-y-y-y-y-y-y-you’re alive?」

「Yes…… Somehow or other…… you’ve come to help me, haven’t you?」

「W-w-w-w-w-w-well, of course!」

Klein insisted that he’d come to help her. Liar!

Didn’t Deet say they were going to split the money between them? She guessed that would be the case – it looks as if she was right.

Knowing they cast their comrade aside so easily, I thought they’d be like this.

I can’t let ‘Ria’ hear these things.

「I’m so happy…… Klein……」

「G-gah! Well, it’s only natural that we’d come to help out our comrade!」

Angrily, Deet said,

「Klein, what are you on about? Didn’t you say you’d moved on from Ria, and you’re with me now? Whatever. Let’s sell that woman’s dress armour and shield and split the profits.」

Klein’s face was already deathly pale. It was impossible to tell which of them was supposed to be a corpse.

「W-w-w-w-w-w-we’ll pay you a reward, Deet, don’t worry.」

「I see. Thank you very much. In that case, I’ll hold my tongue.」

The ‘lady knight’ crawled weakly towards Klein. She looked up at him with pleading eyes.

「Klein….. What is she talking about? Surely you didn’t come to ‘hold a memorial service’ for me?」

「O-o-o-o-o-o-of course not! Deet just says strange things.」

「That’s true…… You told me that, didn’t you, Klein? ……Tee-hee-hee…」

The ‘lady knight’ laughed happily. There was something off about that laugh.

「Tee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee…………」

「R-Ria……?」

「By the way, Klein… Since you came to help me, you must have brought your own sword with you, right? Please give me back the sword that was granted to me by Lady Monica.」

「U-um…!」

Klein glanced at Barney. He’s probably looking to him for help. Barney shook his head.

「Klein. We have to pay Deet. There’s nothing in the ‘Principles of the Adventurer’s Guild’ that says you have to give it back just because she turned out to be alive!」

These two really only think about themselves.

In any case, it’s only because no-one’s turned up alive before that there isn’t a rule about it.

But they were so shameless that they’d probably use that as a reason to muscle their way through.

Time to put my plan into action! Stealthily, I reached out and pressed the button by the robot arm.

「Wh-what’s that sound?」

The two men looked above them to where the sound was coming from.

「A s-suspended ceiling?」

In reality, it was an iron door, but the thickness of the door made it look like a suspended ceiling when viewed from below.

Unable to stand up, the two of them tried to escape by scrambling backwards on their butts.

But the ‘lady knight’, laughing, grabbed hold of their feet.

「Tee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee……」

「What are you doing?」Klein almost screamed. At the same time, the face of the ‘lady knight’ melted off, revealing her skull in an instant.

Shizuku was also playing her part well. Perhaps because she was a slime, watching her turn the face from flesh into liquid and melt away was enough to freak me out, too.

「Aaaaaaggggghhh! L-let go of meeeeeeeeeeee!」

Klein and Barney’s screams rang out.

「Please return…… Aria’s sword…… The sword of mithril. If you give it back, I’ll think about letting you go…」

「I will! I’ll give it baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!」

「Thank you very much. But I’ve thought about it, and I’m not going to let go of you. ☆」

「Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!」

Klein and Barney seemed to have fainted.

I pressed the button one more time. With a click, the iron door began to rise up again.

「Hey, you two are quite the actors」I said admiringly to Deet and Shizuku as I stood up.

「That’s because I was really angry!」                              

「When a slime gets mad, they get really mad, you see!」

Of course. Even I was angry.

I looked at the two unconscious figures.

「That Klein guy’s wet himself. Shall we do the same to Barney to make things equal in the commemorative photo?」

I splashed some of the cola that I’d brought with me just in case onto Barney’s crotch.

Then I took a photo of the two of them with my camera.

「Right. I recorded them saying they’d return the sword on my smartphone, and I’ve taken a picture with my camera as well. Deet, Shizuku, shall we go back to the apartment?」

「Yeah.」

「Yes!」

♦︎ ♦︎ ♦︎

The monitor in the Western-style room showed the two of them lying inside the closed iron door.

In place of the mithril sword, I’d casually put down the sword that Deet had bought on the surface in front of Klein’s face.

「……And to top it all off, printouts of the commemorative photo…」

「What’s with that weird monologue?」

「You sound like a chef.」

Deet gave me a wondering look, then glanced at the monitor and laughed.

「Oh, those two have come round. They’re looking at the photos you put out, Thor! Heeheehee…」

I opened the iron door and watched on the monitor as they scurried away like frightened bunnies.

「All that’s left to do is deliver the mithril sword to Ria, who’s by herself in the Japanese-style room, and then we’re done.」

I picked up the mithril sword and went into the Japanese-style room. Tactfully, neither Deet nor Shizuku followed me.

When I entered the room, I found Ria sitting in the corner in her gym shorts, her hands clasping her knees.

「……Is it over?」

「It’s over.」

I handed the mithril sword to Ria.

「Oh! …… This is the sword that Lady Monica bestowed upon me. Thank you so much.」

Shedding tears, Ria hugged the sword close. It made me very glad to see her like that.

She’ll probably never see those two again.

I’d intended to stick the commemorative photo up on the noticeboard in the Adventurer’s Guild – and to keep putting it there.

But, from what I’d seen on the monitor, there might not be any need for that.

With regard to those two, everything had turned out fine. But there was still one thing that I had to do.

「I’m so happy that you were angry on my behalf, Sir Thor.」

「Huh?」

「After all, I thought you were the gentle type, the kind who doesn’t really get angry.」

「Well, I guess it’s quite rare for me to get cross.」

She probably means that I got mad at Klein and Barney.

「One can’t say that Klein and Barney are bad, as adventurers go.」

「Ria…… I don’t care about the law, or the Principles of the Adventurer’s Guild.」

「That’s because you’re Japanese, Sir Thor.」

「No, it’s because I’m me.」

「What do you mean by that?」

「It might be right according to the law, or the rules of the Adventurer’s Guild. But wouldn’t you rather decide for yourself what’s right and what’s wrong? What I wanted to say is, even if everyone else in the world thinks it’s right, if it makes you sad, Ria, then I think it’s wrong.」

「Sir Thor……」

I felt my face growing a little red. But I got the feeling that, if I was going to say things like this that made me look good, then I had to tell her the truth as well.

「Ria, the fact is there’s something in particular I want to tell you.」

「Wh-what’s that?」

I looked down. It was hard for me to say it.

「I’m not a wise sage. I’m sorry.」

I couldn’t see Ria’s face. But I couldn’t run away from this forever.

I lifted my head timidly.

「I knew that. I’m the one who should be apologising.」

Ria was smiling from ear to ear.

「What? You already knew?」

「I still don’t know exactly what kind of person you are, Sir Thor, but all the same, I know that you’re not a wise sage.」

That’s true. I must’ve seemed pretty weird.

「But why are you saying sorry to me?」

Ria looked apologetic.                                  

「I figured it out, but I kept pretending that I was still fooled.」

「But why?」

「Um…… I enjoyed living with you so much, Sir Thor, that I ended up depending on you and staying on here. Because you’d forgiven me, and because I didn’t have a sword, and because of the trauma I’d suffered. I must have been a nuisance, right?」

「What! Is that how you see it? You’ve done me a favour by staying with me all this time…」

Besides, Ria couldn’t really have returned to the surface, right? Surely going back to that dark cave would have been more frightening than anything else.

「Incidentally, what kind of person are you, really?」

「U-um, I wonder. It’s difficult to explain, you see.」

As I sat cross-legged on the tatami, pondering, Ria knelt in front of me.

She turned towards the handle of her sword.

「Huh?」

「I don’t mind who you are, Sir Thor.」

It looked like a pose I’d seen somewhere. I-is she really……

「For as long as I live, I pledge my sword and my fealty to you, Sir Thor……」

「What? W-wait a sec. There’s no need for that.」

「I-is that so?」

H-huh? You’re giving up that easily?

「In that case, please accept me as your bride.」

「Whaaaaaaaaaat? I… um……」

「Whether I’m your knight or your bride, it’s all the same to me. Please be my new master. I can’t make it without a master. So please, choose one. If it’s at all possible, the latter…」

Somehow, she seemed extremely happy.

「W-well, maybe you’d better be my knight? Since you’ll be going to the surface of the other world as an adventurer…」

Ria puffed out her cheeks and said in a clearly offhand way,

「I dedicate my sword and my fealty to you, Sir Thor.」

Is this really the attitude of a knight?

「There will be adventures too, of course. Feel free to choose Deet or Shizuku for those, Sir Thor.」

「Ulp.」

‘Deet doesn’t mean anything to me, and Shizuku’s a white slime!’ I should have retorted, but for some reason I couldn’t reply.

「But if you want me not as a knight but as a bride, please don’t hesitate to tell me at any point. I’ll be waiting for you.」

As she said this, the blonde knight in gym shorts blushed bashfully and smiled.