4 Solutions Pt.2

Thinking about those early times, we did not have much to say or do, and now, we have families of our own. We truly were grown up.

My lips curved upwards, and I moved near Mapalla and Trigman. They both stopped their verbal abuses and looked at me in confusion.

"Hey, Mad, why are you crying?" Trigman questioned.

I didn't even realize that I had tears rolling down my cheeks. I touched both of my eyelids and wiped them away. When I opened my eyes, I was able to see them better.

"You guys are the best"

Their open mouths closed immediately, and they smiled too.

Trigman waved my reports he had in his hands and guided me towards a chair. He sat down on his Doctor chair following me and said, "Do you want to check your report, or should I explain everything out?"

"No, I don't understand anything anyway, so tell me what I should know."

"Apparently, nothing's wrong I didn't find anything out of place." Trigman said as he shrugged his shoulders.

"Then why did you make it sound as a big deal when there was nothing to explain?" I had weight in my tone. Probably because I did not want my sex life disturbed.

"Just to get a reaction out of you. I believe you had this test regarding your pregnancy issues?" Trigman Inquired.

"Whoo! Look at little angel, trying to be a big lady." Mapalla chimed in. Then he gave some thought to what Trigman said," Wait, what pregnancy issues?"

I threw my arms down like a boxer who just lost a fight. Probably like Duran.

I was also at the point where I was ready to throw in the towel.

No Mas.

As I was lost in thought of a retired boxer, Trigman filled Mapalla of the details.

How Kyo and I decided to give birth to a child.

How I went to the sperm bank and got it injected in me.

How I failed five times.

Mapalla listened to all of this while staring blankly towards the white porcelain roof as he whiffed his cigarette.

After the last puff, he muttred, "Sounds like your EQ and SQ are messed up."

I rose my lowered head and shot a look at him. He was composed and stoic.

I did not want Mapalla to tell me that. Anyone but him.

Let me explain why.

Mapalla is a spiritual speaker. Like a public speaker. I don't have a job definition for him. The only reason why he is not at home most of the times is because he is travelling the world. He has been asked to give speeches at Oxford, Yale, and Cambridge to name a few. He is named 'Life Liberator' by his followers. After writing four books and numerous articles for Magazines like Weed World and Dr. Oz, he is a true cult of personality.

And if anyone could place a finger on my mental state, it was Mapalla. Looking at him is like reflecting at yourself. He is like still water. One can see his reflection into him, and the moment he starts speaking, he revolutionizes the perception of their listener. If I could describe HIS PERSONLAITY in one word, it would be SUBJECTIVE.

And that was the reason I didn't want Mapalla to say anything. If he did, like just now, it would be like my soul was screaming in my face.

I still mustered up the courage and asked him to explain.

He was no longer lying on the table but was sitting on the side.

"There are three concepts of a human mind. IQ, EQ and SQ. IQ refers to your 'Intelligence Quotient', which is stable in your case. You have a job. You put food on the table. You know how to behave in public.

EQ is Emotional Quotient. Anything involving emotions would trigger this aspect. You have a stable EQ right now, but it wavers, because of the consequences you so much focus on.

SQ is last and the most important one. It is Spiritual Quotient. For the lack of better words, it is the balance of your soul. This affects both IQ & EQ. and this, my angel is affecting your whole body."

I was struck with lightning.

"You-You mean to say this chemical imbalance in my mind is rejecting my desire to bear a child?"

"This is no chemical imbalance. You have done some things in the past. Probably not of the pleasant kind. And not just once. You question if this is your last chance, the last shot at life. You are afraid fate is going to play with you again, and you don't want to be liable for when it happens.

Abandonment that you have accustomed to is not a pleasant attribute to house."

"Mapalla, shut up. Before I punch your teeth in, shut up!" My tears were back.

"You think your life is a white board. Clean all the marker stains, and its anew again. But it is a black board, angel. Rubbing it once would not remove all the lines drawn by the chalk of life."

"Mapalla, not one more word." The rage was rising in me. I was barely stable to sit in one spot.

"There have been dark moments, but you were able to escape them all. Took a way out. But it did not fruit the way you wanted. Now for the desires of present, you must jump in the past and do the right that you escaped."

"Mapalla!!!!" I was red. I was furious. I was screaming. "Not one more word!!" I picked up the chair I was sitting on and was ready to slam it into his face.

"You need to conquer your past. Go back to where you came from. Go back to each one of your lovers and beg for your forgiveness!"

"Aaaaarhhhh" I charged at Mapalla, who was less than thirty feet away from me. My feet dragged a little. I was conscious of what I was doing, but the emotions that ruled my head were raging fire on my consciousness.

I almost hit Mapalla when my grip loosened. The chair I was holding, was no longer in my hands.

The right side of my cheek felt warm. My face was also turned to a side.

*SLAP*

Ah, the discipline keeper Trigman had just slapped me across the face.

When I turned my head to face him, I got a glass of cold water in my face.

"Cool you head, Mad. What do you think you are doing!" His volume was higher and had tones of aggression in it.

He continued. "You have been a hot head, that does not mean you can stay in this phase forever. Learn some conduct and restrict yourself."

It was not the first time Trigman had slapped me. I was sure it wasn't going to be the last either. The final words may have been uttered by Mapalla, but the final call was always Trigman's.

I just stood there with my arms twitching and my head hanging.

Mapalla, who catched the chair, put it down. He must have signalled Trigman to sit because he also threw his weight on his chair with a thud.

What do you have to say for yourself? Once again, both had to deal with your tantrum.

My conscience hit me. Hard.

I raised both my arms and charged towards Mapalla once more. This time to wrap in my hug.

"I-I-I am really sorry Map. I am just too much broken. Just give me some advise so that I can escape from this mess. I want to see Kyo happy." I said all that while I was a sobbing heap.

Mapalla hugged me with one arm and caressed my head with another. "I will do anything for you. But what I do or say will sting you. You have to be brave to face the challenge."

I held him tightly and prepared to hear what I already knew.

"You said you want to see Kiyomi happy. Well, what about those girls of your past? They wanted happiness alongside you. But, you know, stuff happens. And you ended up having five breakups before setting your happy life with Kiyomi. Past doesn't run away from you. It runs after you. You have to face the music. If nothing is wrong with your body, then somethings is wrong with your soul. Let it treat itself. For the happiness of tomorrow, face your past once more and set it right."

"I can't!!! Kyo thinks that I have no memories of my past. That night in Nepal, I shed it all when Kyo saved me. I can't drag her into the mistakes I made."

"You call it mistakes now. Didn't you call them love before? Face those girls once more. Take this burden off your conscience. Let them forgive you. If lucky, let them forget you. Be a scar they can scratch once a while. Not a wound which gushes blood at the slightest touch."

"How would I be able to face her Kyo?"

"Kiyomi loves you, and if there is strength in your bond, she would understand."

I loosened my grip around Mapalla and set him free of my clutch.

I set my dress straight and headed towards the door.

Wiping the last of my tears, I faced the boys and said," If I am safe tomorrow, would you accompany me?"

The boys smiled. "To the edge of the world, where our angel flutters her wings, we the dukes to her presence would omit all evil for her sake."

They said that in unison.

Just like all those other times.

I swung the door open and saw a pretty lady in a red shirt and a white skirt nodding off. Basking in the sunlight, she seemed like the princess who had descended upon the earth for everyone's sake.

NO, for my sake alone.

I walked over to her and put my hand on her cheek. I rubbed her lips with my thumb. Soft as rose's petals.

She opened her eyes slowly in the middle of my aspiration of her.

"Kyo, wake up. Let's go home."