Chapter 60 - All Seeing (5)

Three days before the group blind date event,

3 PM at the trucking department office,

Nida was just blankly staring at her monitor and randomly moving her mouse without doing any real work. She is just pretending to do work while she wastes her time daydreaming.

"How will I forgive myself and Randell?"

This is the question that keeps on popping up in her head and keeps her distracted the whole day.

Her relationship with Randell is something she is concerned about these days, putting aside her battle with her god and her issue with her power.

She exactly knows now how Randell felt when he had the horrifying wolf attack decades ago.

She has a better understanding of his situation and how that nightmare ten years ago affected him as well.

She knows.

She is now aware.

However, why is she still skeptical about welcoming Randell back to her heart?

She is still thinking about whether they still need to come back together again and also whether the fear of hurting each other again is there.

She is thinking that forgiving him and herself should not be a eureka moment, where she is struggling horribly and struggling horribly, only to wake up one morning completely cured. She thinks that forgiveness not only takes time, but it takes baby steps forward.

Nevertheless, how does she make the first step?

"Nida! Our date on Sunday is really final! The boys confirm their attendance. Make sure you get ready, okay?

Ms. Lisa, who was extremely excited about their group blind date, interrupted her internal monologue.

"That's nice. Anyway, do you know the guys that we will be meeting?" She smiled kindly toward Lisa, although she really couldn't match her energy.

"Not really, they are complete strangers."

"Complete strangers?" Randell suddenly exclaimed and joined their conversation. His seat was beside Nida's, which is why he could clearly hear whatever they were talking about.

"How can you carelessly meet strangers? That's dangerous!" he added.

Ms. Lisa was not offended by Randell's sudden interruption and responded to him with the same excited energy.

"That's the exciting thing about blind dates! Meeting a completely stranger and finding love with them is something I look forward to! And it is not dangerous at all since we will come in groups. We will also meet in a crowded and well-known place. So we are not that worried about security." She excitedly explained while Randell listened attentively to her.

He is too worked up to prevent Nida from joining the blind date, but he cannot oppose it openly.

Nida just observed Randell's behaviors as she thought, "I am not assuming about his feelings towards me, right?"

She is not too dense to not notice Randell's feelings that never fade away, even though they are separated.

She begins to recognize it again after Randell agreed to do her more favors over the course of their relationship.

"Am I being too selfish if I accept his love again, or will it do him good if I turn down his feelings? Am I deserving of his love? "

She is back in her own internal monologue now that Lisa and Randell are arguing about the safety of going on a blind date.

She stood up and decided to leave the two since she did not have the energy to talk.

She walked out of their department and decided to have a walk around the building.

Nida aimlessly walked around the hallway while her mind also wondered somewhere else.

"That police officer is so damn hot!"

"His body is well tuned. I never thought there were still policemen with good bodies. "

"Haha right, common to them is having a bulging belly. I wonder how they will catch criminals with those tummies. "

Nida heard a group of ladies admiring a fine man who was stationed at the police post outside their compound while scrutinizing the majority of the police who didn't have physically fit bodies.

She peeked outside the window since they were on the fourth floor of their building and the ladies were sightseeing from above.

"Hmm? Toto? "

She narrowed her gaze toward the person that the ladies were staring at. She felt like she could recognize the shape of the body even from a distance because of its similarity to Johnny Bravo's body.

"Toto?"

She pulled out her phone from her coat and dialed Toto's number.

"Hello? What's up? " Toto greeted

"Are you stationed at the police outpost near our building?"

"Your building?"

"Yep, at CTC."

"Ah, yes, yes. How did you know? "

"Well, the ladies in my company are fantasizing about your body. Your body really stands out. "

"Haha! Of course! I worked hard for this! "

"Haha! Anyway, are you allowed to leave your post now? "

"I am why?"

"Want to eat sweets with me?"

"Are you planning to make me fat?"

"Yep."

"Okay, come down here now! "

The two talk the same way ten years ago, and it doesn't feel awkward even though it's been a long time since they hung out with each other.

Nida hurriedly came down from her building and went off to work, forgetting about her job.

"I am fine with my post since I am almost time off, but how about you? I think office hours are not done yet." Toto said as he guided Nida to where he parked his car.

"Don't mind my work. I can live without it."

She sat in his car and input into the GPS the café she wanted to go to.

"Haha, that's nice to have a safety net." Toto said, without realizing he had offended Nida.

Back then, they always called Nida's parents her "safety net" because no matter how much Nida messed up, her parents would always come and almost instantly fix it for her. But of course, things change over time, and that safety net turns into a hazard net.

"Yeah right, I have a huge safety net." She said this in contrast to her own thoughts.

Toto started to drive the car and felt awkward with the sudden silence inside.

"Are you and Ranz dating again?" he randomly asked, since he didn't have anything else to say to start a conversation.

"No, we are not." Nida just dryly responded, and that made the car silent again.

"Toto."

"Yes?"

Her voice sounded very concerned, and that made Toto look at her and see her troubled expression.

"Is there something troubling you?"

Nida hesitated to open up to Toto because he did not entirely know what happened to them.

He is still not aware that Randell was the wolf who attacked and killed many people that night. He just knew that Randell and Nida were involved with supernatural beings.

"Is it okay to date Randell again?" She asked without proper context since she didn't want to reveal everything to Toto yet.

"Why? Is there a problem that you cannot date him? "

"Not really. I am just thinking if it is okay, since I am worried that I may hurt him or herself. "

Toto focuses his eyes on the road, but he knows that Nida is hiding something from him that relates to her relationship with Randell.

"Hmm? You will not know if it is okay or not unless you both try it. But before that, there is only one thing to ask yourself before going straight to him. " Toto started to state his advice and opinion, regardless of knowing his friend's true issue. He just wanted to help by putting her mind at ease.

"What is it?"

"Ask yourself if you're also okay with it. Then I asked him if he also wanted to date again, and if he said yes, then there's no problem anymore. Just date freely like before. "

Nida smiled at Toto's advice.

"You made my issue sound easy, Toto." She commented.

"Haha, sorry if I made it sound like that, but that's my opinion." I know you're not sharing everything with me, and that is why the answer to your problem will only come to you at the end.

"Oh, sorry for not telling you."

"It's okay, I won't force you to tell me. Don't worry."

"Thanks." Nida is relieved that Toto is the same as before.

"Anyway, the way you advise me, as if you have previously dated, Wait! Are you dating someone now? " Nida lightly tapped his shoulder to tease him, but he responded with a large smile.

"Haha, sorry to tell you this late, but I am a married man with two kids."

"What? Really? " She perked up and looked at him with surprise. "Someone marry you?"

"Wow, that reaction is extraordinary." He sarcastically responded. "Do you believe I've remained a child in the decades we haven't seen each other? Of course, I grew up too. "

"Oh! Our little toto overtakes us and gets married first!" She jokingly messed up his hair.

"Haha, stop it." He also jokingly slapped her hand off him because she was distracting him from driving.

"You know, Nida, it's been a decade. I think you need to let go of what happened ten years ago. Free yourself. "

"Free myself?" She repeated Toto's word and engraved it on her heart, and convinced herself to really free herself from her nightmare from ten years ago.