Chapter 589

"Siyan, we..." Xiao Jin's voice was a little hoarse and blurred, "let's slow down!"

Slowly

Slowly, does it mean breaking up??

Siyan bit her lower lip and refused to let herself cry on the phone.

"Let's relax and let ourselves and each other be quiet! We have to admit that we have now gone astray. If we continue so persistently, we can only have one result... That is, there is no result! "

Xiao Jin's breathing on the phone was a little heavy. The silence of this Siyan made him suffer constantly.

Finally

Siyan said, "OK! Let's be quiet... "

There was a clear cry in her voice.

She really needs to be quiet again!!

In the more than one year since Xiao Jin left, Siyan felt that she had completely changed herself. She was no longer as sociable or lively as before. She poured her whole world into this man. However, for Xiao Jin, such pouring was a tight hoop curse, a yoke on his neck, which made him completely out of breath.

Tired him and tired her

She also needs a rest!!

"Xiao Jin, I have something else to do. I won't talk first! If you want to suddenly think of me again in the future, you can call me... Bye! "

Siyan finished and hung up before he wanted to speak.

As soon as the phone hung up, Siyan couldn't help squatting on the ground and crying.

Crying heartbroken and hysterical.

As soon as Qiao Lu came out of the room, she saw the crying Siyan on the balcony. She was frightened and hurried over, "what's the matter? Siyan, how can you cry like this? "

Qiao Lu kept wiping tears for Siyan. Siyan rushed into Qiao Lu's arms and held her crying, "Qiao Lu, Xiao Jin doesn't want me... Xiao Jin doesn't want me... Sobbing..."

Qiao Lu was frozen there, holding Siyan and motionless.

In my mind, I was in a trance for a moment.

"How... How? Did you quarrel? "

"It's not a quarrel, it's a breakup..."

"Break up“

Qiao Lu squatted beside Siyan, and couldn't return to her mind for half a sound, "what's the matter? How did you break up? Xiao Jin loves you so much... Siyan, you must think too much! "

"He said he was tired. He didn't want to go on like this... Qiao Lu, my feelings for Xiao Jin are just a yoke for him... That's all!"

This night, Qiao Lu sat on the balcony with Siyan for nearly two hours.

"Siyan, if you and Xiao Jin can't be together, I will doubt whether love really exists in this world..."

Jolu leaned her head against the wall and muttered to herself.

Siyan smiled bitterly, "if there is no love, how can I feel so painful now?"

That feeling... It's like the heart was torn apart. It hurts so much that it's hard to breathe.

"Siyan..."

Qiao Lu's eyes were already red. "You and Xiao Jin only need to stick to it for less than half a year. Why do you choose to give up at this time?"

Siyan took a deep breath

The chest hurts a little badly.

"Xiao Jin needs freedom..."

She doesn't want to use herself as a yoke to lock him anymore!!

In fact, this lock locks not only Xiao Jin, but also herself!!

But he and Xiao Jin both need to grow up!!

After feeling frustrated, Siyan read a book by Zhang Ailing called missing the past.

There is a passage in the article that makes her remember particularly deeply.

——I didn't miss you very deliberately, because I know that when I meet you, I should be grateful, and when I pass by, I need to be relieved. I just think of you in many small moments. For example, a movie, a song, a lyrics, a road and countless moments of closing your eyes.

This passage seems to best interpret Siyan's state of mind at this moment.

Since that day, after they decided to slow down, there has been no contact.

She no longer on MSN, no longer logged in to QQ, no longer read microblog, and even changed her phone number completely.

She did this just to be more cruel to herself!

Because she was afraid that she could not help contacting him, looking for him, begging him, and then continuing to pester him and bind him... She didn't know whether Xiao Jin had contacted her, probably not!

He should have a comfortable life without her harassment!

……

Time, a little bit spent in suffering.

Siyan's life seems to have not changed at all, and everything seems to have changed!

She began to be happy to participate in various collective activities and integrate into the circle of students. Her life was no longer the Internet, but a more practical communication circle. She even occasionally participated in social activities with female students in her class and male students in other departments.

Although no male classmate can move her, Siyan no longer repels talking and approaching with boys as before.

According to Qiao Lu's words, "I think this kind of you is the Siyan I knew at that time!"

Maybe girls really have to pass an unforgettable and failed love before they can learn to grow and manage future love!

Siyan is also very clear. Now she is very relaxed and comfortable... She has no care, no binding, and she doesn't have to think about someone all the time... But only she knows that every night, in her dream, the same face will appear on time!

In the dream, they are still so friendly, not tired, not bored. The only thing they have is love and laughter.

Every morning when she wakes up, her heart will be empty for a long time

Breaking up with him is not simply pulling a person who once loved him deeply from his life, but... Empty a heart with bare hands!!

Pain, pain, loneliness, emptiness

Too many words can't describe the most real feeling in my heart.

Only what you have really experienced can you understand.

Siyan was stunned in bed for dozens of minutes before he opened the quilt, got out of bed and prepared to wash.

"Siyan -"

Just at this meeting, the bedroom door was pushed open by jolu from the outside.

"What's the matter?"

Siyan looked back at her.

"Have you cried? Why are your eyes red? "

Jolu seems to have found something wrong with Siyan.

"No!"

Siyan quickly denied, "I just had a nightmare and woke myself up!"

yes!

For her, Xiao Jin's dreams are nightmares!! It's her nightmare after waking up!!

Only she knows how happy she is in her dream and how painful she is at the moment she wakes up!!

"The nightmare is all right. It's all fake."

Jolu hurried to comfort her.

"What are you doing here?"

Siyan asked her.

Jolu paused, looked at Siyan and thought, "Siyan..."

Qiao Lu stood on the edge of the bathroom door frame, looked at the Siyan who was preparing to gargle, and finally said, "do you know that the foreign students who went to France... Have... Returned early!"

The act of thinking about smoking and gargling suddenly.

Turn your head and look at jolu at the door.

There was a dull look.

Jolu nodded.

Siyan remained there for a long time. He came back and continued to gargle.

There was no superfluous expression on his face.

It seemed as if she had never heard of jolu's words, but the action of gargling slightly accelerated the speed.

The toothbrush brushed on her white shell teeth, touched the gums and exuded blood, but Siyan was still rinsing there as if he had never noticed it, and the action of brushing teeth in her hand was unexpectedly aggravated.

"Think of smoke!"

“？”

Siyan looked at jolu.

Qiao Lu pointed to her teeth, "don't brush, it's bleeding..."

Thought smoke suddenly responded, looked in the mirror, only then discovered that his small mouth full of foam is already blood paste sea of blood.

"Nothing!"

She grinned and slobber her mouth out of foam. "I am angry. It's okay, every day."

Jolu looked at her, sighed and patted her on the shoulder. "All right, wash up and get ready for breakfast and class."

"... OK."

Siyan finished washing in a trance, went out of the bedroom with a book and was about to ask Qiao Lu to have breakfast. Unexpectedly, Zhou Jiao rushed out, "Siyan, do you know that Xiao Jin of your family is back!!"

Siyan looked dull again, and his heart pulled obviously.

After a long time, he replied faintly, "I haven't paid attention to his affairs for a long time! I'll go out for breakfast first. "

Even Qiao Lu didn't call, Siyan hurriedly escaped from the dormitory.

Xiao Jin

Xiao Jin

The name that haunts her every moment of the day... The name that seems to have been engraved into her bones and blood with a knife... Siyan fled from the dormitory, held a book and walked to the canteen.

Xiao Jin is back

Her heart, obviously, jumped especially hard.

Is he really back?

Isn't it two months before he ends his study abroad career?

But what if I come back? Coming back is just... Parting again!!

Nearly two years, she is a sophomore, Xiao Jin... A senior!!

Once he said he would go to graduate school, but now, I don't know whether he still remembers this Agreement... Or whether it is still an agreement.

"Senior Xiao Jin!!"

Suddenly, Siyan heard a girl cry, "are you really back? Long time no see... "

"Well, back."

Xiao Jin's extremely magnetic voice sounded impressively behind Siyan.

At that moment, as if there was a bomb, "boom -" exploded in Siyan's mind.

Instantly, the brain is blank!!

The steps under his feet stopped stiffly.

She turned back

I saw it, not ten meters behind her... Xiao Jin!!

At that moment, the tears of Siyan almost flowed out like a flood.

But she forced herself to hold back!

She can't cry, she can't cry in front of Xiao Jin!

Xiao Jin is still the male god who attracts the admiration of many girls. Wherever he goes, he is the shining point.

Simple white T-shirt, washed jeans, short hair and spirit.

It seems that it's not much different from what she saw six months ago, but it's more restrained.

His eyes fell on Siyan's face and looked at her for a moment.

In the eyes, there are too many complex emotions

The ripples opened in circles, swinging in Siyan's heart, so that she really didn't know what to do for a time.

For a long time——

She nodded generously at him.

As a greeting.

Turn around and get ready to go.

"Siyan!!"

Suddenly, a familiar voice sounded and stopped Siyan.

"Is that you? Good boy, I haven't seen you for two years. My hair is so long!! "

Besides the careless ah Qi, who else?

He rushed up, put his arm on Siyan's shoulder generously, and said with a grin, "I can't see. You're a woman... Hum, it's beautiful!"