Chapter 42

“Dalia!” Dalia!” While I was constantly blaming myself and getting overwhelmed, I felt Kaichen’s hand on my shoulders and his voice calling me.

“Ah… Teacher…,” I managed to mumble. Kaichen knelt in front of me and held my shoulders tightly and looked me in the eye.

“You don’t have to tell me, I won’t ask…. So, stop,” he said gently. “You can stop thinking about it.”

“Ah… I…”

“It’s okay.” He told me what I had wanted to hear the most. He didn’t expect an answer and it was okay. It was so reassuring, and his eyes looked at me so warmly. I sighed in relief.

“I’m sorry, teacher,” I uttered useless words of apology. I was already soaked in a cold sweat. I could even feel the heat throughout my body. I felt unstable both physically and mentally.

“Let’s stop here for today and take some rest.”

“Thank you.” I bid him goodbye and returned to my bedroom, but I felt uncomfortable. I let out a weary sigh. I searched my bag for the medicine I had made. I hadn’t known what Mickey’s disease was, so I had brought the medicine along to consult Kaichen about its efficacy and the ingredients.

I grabbed the vial of medicine tightly and headed back to the lab where Kaichen was. He looked surprised to see me here again. But when he saw me, he approached me from the desk.

“Didn’t I tell you to rest?”

“Yes…but…”

“Do you want to be sick again?”

“No…”

“If you do not want to get sick, then listen to me and take the day off.”

It was strange to see him scolding me so gently. The frown on his face was the same as usual but his tone was different. I braced myself for what I was about to say.

“This… this is the antidote I mentioned earlier.” I offered him the vial of medicine. “Teacher, please examine it in detail. It will help you with your research.”

He looked at me and sighed. “Couldn’t you have given this to me later?”

“You told me to cooperate actively.”

As he leaned against the door, he smiled. It was a strange to see him reach out to support me and then clench his fists and lower them. He looked conflicted. He wanted to help but I guess his mysophobia stopped him from touching others. I smiled and then laughed.

“Then I… I will leave now and rest a bit. I don’t want to cause you more trouble…,” I said hurriedly. He accepted the medicine vial and placed it gingerly on the palm of his hand. I returned to my room and laid down on the bed.

I had only been able to get out of my bed after ten days, and I couldn’t believe I collapsed on the bed after only half a day. How do I have such poor stamina? I thought about the ingredients in my blood. If it was really Gordon, then I might be suffering from mental degradation.

I thought she was perfectly normal, but she turned out to be a completely crazy woman. Dalia had lost her mind because she was trapped in time magic, but I thought it might be because of this that her mind did not return to normal even after the magic was broken. Looking at what has been revealed so far… It had been a perfect crime. Someone had tried to assassinate Dalia in the most unsuspicious and brutal way. Damn you, Dalia!

I closed my eyes tightly. Not for the first time, I lamented that I was stuck in a useless novel. My eyes throbbed. I took the medicine that Kaichen had given me from the table, drank it all up and pressed my palms to my eyes. It was a familiar pain.

“It hurts…” I was really used to pain but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. I smiled hollowly, while pressing on my eyes.

It’s really damn hard to get off on the right foot.

* * *

Nightmares always started with the same scene. I wake up in a boring room where not a single grain of dust has changed. The sky is clear without a single cloud, and bottles of alcohol are rolling around in the spacious room.

The dazzling sunlight shines through the thick curtains. It was the same day every time. Whether I woke up early or late didn’t matter. It was the same every time. The same room, the same view. After waking up, I kicked the bottle on the ground and drank the alcohol on the table. Otherwise, my hands would tremble violently.

Who said it? That one drinks because of weak willpower. I’ve been drinking like this for decades. The same day, the same habit. No matter how much I drank, I didn’t get drunk. At first, I thought that Dalia’s body was strong, she resisted intoxication, but it was not the case. My mind was strong.

I wanted to get drunk and forget but my mind did not get intoxicated no matter how much I drank. At first, with my body, I thought my mind was also getting drunk, but it began to become clearer instead of intoxicated.

“Lady, you already drank a lot.”

“Huh? No… no matter how much I drink, I don’t get drunk, so it’s okay. Las! Bring me more!

You will forget this tomorrow, anyway. Nobody remembered the events of any day anyway, everything started with a clean slate the next day. Nobody remembered me either. I was so lonely, so I brazenly pretended that I knew them. I wanted to not feel so alone. Hardly anyone welcomed the drunken countess.