Chapter 146

“I guess, I should send some medicine to the Sorel Mansion.” The corners of my lips rose instinctively at the voice.

I felt so angry and jealous knowing that Kaichen did not care about Lamia. I didn’t have his heart, so I was worried that I might lose this man to another woman one day. I was extremely anxious; I couldn’t even confess to him for the fear of our existing relationship falling apart.

“You.”

“What?”

“Why do you keep fighting with that woman?”

“……”

Because I hate that she is obsessed with you. I swallowed the answer that came to my mind automatically. When he seemed to relax in the dark alleyway, his golden eyes flashed.

I looked him in the eye and said, “Because I want to win… I already told you.”

“…”

” I can’t lose, no matter what.”

“…”

As I closed my eyes and sighed, I realized the depth of my feelings once again. It felt more natural to like this man than to breathe. I didn’t want him to be looked at and touched by any other woman. I want him for myself. I want his heart. I had to admit that my shallow desire to be loved by him had grown to the point where I could no longer control it.

Kaichen slowly turned his head around to look at me. It was hard to see what kind of face he made under the dark alleyway.

“Even though I already told you that you won,” Kaichen said. His voice was lower than usual. Then he grabbed my hand. In the blink of an eye, we reached the mansion.

Returning to my familiar room, I watched the heat disappear from my hands. My mouth curled up at the lingering warmth at the fingertips.

“Teacher, I had a great time today,” I said, feeling light.

“Go and rest then.”

Kaichen hurriedly disappeared as if something urgent had happened. I wanted to properly say goodbye to him but he was already gone. Feeling regretful, I lay down on the sofa. I recalled what had happened today and realized that it was more enjoyable than I had expected. I thought the day would be very uncomfortable, but it turned out to be unexpectedly fun.

“We had a proper date.”

I didn’t mean to go out alone with him, but it ended up being just the two of us. We roamed the streets, ate snacks, went to interesting shops, looked around, and enjoyed entertainment together. We sat on a bench and had a light conversation, and we walked hand in hand. We ate dinner at a restaurant with a nice night view. There was a bit of a fuss, but all in all, it was a great date.

“Or… am I the only one who feels that way?”

I was a coward who dared not confess because I was afraid our relationship would break. However, at times, Kaichen’s words and actions gave me hope. It confused me. At times, it made me want to blurt out that I liked him. His warm, soft smile constantly undid me.

You won.  His softly spoken words echoed in my ears. Even though I already told you that you won. My heart was pounding. I could hardly stay still, so I jumped out of my seat. While pacing back and forth in the living room, I bit my lip a little, opened the window and sat on the railing. I looked at the garden, immersed in my thoughts.

If Kaichen felt the same way as I did. If he felt like he couldn’t confess just like me…

“Ah, that’s absurd. But…”

If he really did feel the same way, I wanted to confess as soon as possible. I wanted to go on dates with him. I wanted to hug and kiss him. I wanted to hold hands with him… thinking so made my heart fill with happiness and desire.

I will ask him to escort me to the ball. Julius said he would send me a dress. He said that if I wear it, Kaichen will have to go with me to the ball…

Not just attending together, but if he escorts me as a partner… I will confess then. I will tell him that I like him, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him in the Willow House. Yes, cowardly Dalia. Stop being so afraid and do it!

I clenched my fist, making promises to myself. The most important thing, which was to make a social debut, was already forgotten. I came up with multiple scenarios of how I would confess to him.

I can’t make a mistake. I need to have a plan. I ran to my desk and sighed for hours. Sadly, I had no experience of confessing. My heart, which had been pounding, plunged to the floor the moment it drew another future where Kaichen rejected me. Just thinking about it made me depressed and hopeless.

It was only after the thirty-fourth time of repeating my plan, that I folded the paper and put it in a drawer. I went to wash up. After that, the weeks passed quickly.