Chapter 5: Don't keep letting your bodyguard bridal carry you!

The driver starts the car and leaves the hotel's parking lot, having to navigate his way through a throng of photographers and screaming fans.

All the while Xi Zirui sits shell-shocked in the backseat, trying to make sense of what just happened.

Ni Ni chimes and he almost jumps out of his skin. "Congratulations, host. Public perception increased by 25 points, and reputation increased by 5. Please keep increasing your standing in the entertainment industry."

Xi Zirui chances a worried look at Su Xueyi, but he's fiddling with his mobile and gives no sign of having heard Ni Ni or seeing the bright blue holo screen floating above Xi Zirui's wristband.

That's one thing less for him to worry about, at least.

Since it would be very suspicious if he started talking with Ni Ni, he does a manual web search for the latest news about himself and Han Yu.

As expected the photo of their kiss is everywhere. It's a super topic on weibo, and people are going insane.

The worst part about it is that from the angle it was taken, it looks as if Xi Zirui was not only an active participant, but also pulling Han Yu into the room.

Many people online are congratulating themselves for having figured out their secret relationship ahead of the leaked photo. Others are having entire meltdowns as if they were under the illusion that either Xi Zirui or Han Yu would be entering into a relationship with them, a complete stranger on the internet.

Here and there some people seem interested in slandering them both, with either the obvious homophobic vitriol, or by casting aspersions on their character.

With Xi Zirui this is limited to implying that he's loose, and will sleep around with everyone. Multiple people swear up and down that he slept with every single one of his former bandmates, as well as with high ranking executives in record labels and production companies.

No one is paying much attention about those rumors. His loudest fans remind everyone that those kinds of rumors pop up whenever any celebrity gains a lot of public attention, and assure everyone that he was a virgin until he met Han Yu. Which...what?

The rumor generating the most traction is the one regarding Han Yu having a child with one of his former co-stars. The actress Bai Mi, to whom he was previously romantically linked.

There's a grainy picture circulating around of Bai Mi holding a small child in her arms, in the company of a man who could be Han Yu, maybe, if you squint, or if he photo hadn't been taken with a potato.

Xi Zirui is giving himself a migraine just looking at the photo and trying to recognize three human shapes, let alone identify them.

"Hey, are you okay?" Su Xueyi asks suddenly, giving him a worried look.

From his point of view Xi Zirui must have been crazily looking at the air above his wrist for no discernible reason.

"Uhm, sure, just, you know," he gestures vaguely. "The whole commotion outside the hotel."

Su Xueyi nods in understanding, and then pats Xi Zirui on the knee, offering him a dimpled smile. "I'm sure what that man said isn't true. Han Yu wouldn't start a relationship with you without telling you he had a child with someone else."

He seems so sure of that, which is probably a testament to how nice he is, and a searing indictment of his ability to judge people.

Xi Zirui has known Han Yu for little over a day, and he knows full well he's capable of that and much worse.

But at present, he can't do much more than return Su Xueyi's smile, and mutter, "Thanks."

He's going to kill Han Yu when he sees him.

---

When they arrive in the shooting location, it's already crawling with actors and crew, all of them hard at work. It makes Xi Zirui anxious all over again to remember all these people expect him to act.

Su Xueyi takes him to his trailer so the stylists can help him into his costume. It's the same impractical and billowy cultivator robe of the previous day. The giant sleeves are troublesome enough, to say nothing of the fluttering skirts.

"Do you want help?" Su Xueyi asks, when he sees him struggle to navigate the trailer's stairs.

As humiliating as it is, he does. Especially considering the platform boots, that he loathes with every fiber of his being.

It drizzled in the middle of the night, and there's a small puddle outside the trailer's door. Part of Xi Zirui's hesitation was regarding how best to navigate it without dirtying the hem of his robes.

Su Xueyi's solution is to pick him up under the knees and bridal carry him outside until he can deposit him on dry ground. Again.

He'll never get used to being manhandled so easily, but looking at the subtle definition of Su Xueyi's biceps he thinks maybe he would like to try.

Su Xueyi catches him looking and gives him another of his devastating dimpled smiles. "Don't worry, I don't think Han Yu will be jealous."

It takes him a moment to remember why that would be something he should care about. When he does, it takes real effort not to groan, "Ah, right, of course."

A production assistant finds Xi Zirui to take him to where he's supposed to shoot his next scene.

The scene he fudged the day before will have to be reshot in the afternoon so they can have matching lighting.

Right now he's supposed to shoot a scene with one of his demonic sect's Masters. The beautiful and ruthless, Hua Daixuan. Again, with these names. Evil fairy? Honestly?

It sounds like something a foreigner trying to write a xianxia novel would come up with. (1)

In this scene Hua Daixuan is supposed to warn Hai Yaomei of the dangers of associating too closely Xiu Xianren. Concerns Hai Yaomei was supposed to brush off glibly, while assuring her Xiu Xianren would pay for disrespecting their sect.

Xi Zirui went over every line the day before, and he's pretty sure he has them all memorized. He also knows that he can shout 'line' when he forgets, and someone will read them for him. Useful knowledge to have yesterday, before he made a fool of himself.

Living and learning.

The actress playing Hua Daixuan, Ji Limei, is a newcomer like Xi Zirui. Fresh out of university, and still mostly unknown. She waves shyly at Xi Zirui from across the set. They're shooting another outdoors scene in the woods, and the hair dressers are making sure her long hair falls artfully around her delicate, round face.

The director is sitting on a chair close to the filming perimeter, she runs her hands over her close-cropped hair, takes in a big sobering breath, and yells out, "Action!"

She seems tense, everyone does, now that he notices. It's then that he realizes that everyone is looking at him. They're worried he's going to fuck it up again.

Shit, that just makes him feel a thousand times more nervous.

This scene starts with Hua Daixuan walking towards him, while he tries to rush past her to go running after Xiu Xianren. She then holds him back by the arm, and has her conversation with him.

Time slows down as he watches her approach, waiting for his queue so he can start walking towards her too.

The filming assistant waves towards him, and Xi Zirui starts walking, focusing on Hai Yaomei's mental state.

He doesn't even reach Ji Limei, before the director is yelling, "Cut!"

She sighs and waves towards Xi Zirui. "From the top, this time try not to walk like a stampeding bull. You're an elegant cultivator, every step is supposed to look as if you're floating on air."

Xi Zirui can only nod, and try not to let his mortification show on his face.

---

They go over the scene for what feels like hundreds of times, before the director, Liao Min, finally has something she's happy with.

Happy is probably an overstatement, because when she calls it a wrap she's still glaring daggers at Xi Zirui.

For his part, he never considered that acting would be such a physically demanding job. His under clothes are soaked in sweat and his wig drips water down his nape. He has spent entire hours in the gym that were less exhausting than filming that two minute scene.

Maybe this is why actors are always so thin.

Ji Limei approaches him with a bottle of water and a smile. "Here, Xi laoshi, drink some water."

Unlike him, she looks fresh as a peach blossom. He accepts the water bottle and babbles gratefully. "Thank you, Ji laoshi. You were great, I'll be asking for your guidance in the future."

Ji Limei seems flustered by his words. "Oh, not at all. Xi laoshi is much more talented than I. He's probably still feeling the effects of yesterday's sudden illness."

Why is she speaking so politely with him? Chances are their relationship isn't very close, judging by what he knows of the original Xi Zirui's personality.

"Ji Laoshi is a great actress. I'm sorry if I ever gave the impression I didn't think so."

She's so quick to wave away his words, and shake her head in denial that it only makes Xi Zirui certain the original must have been unspeakably rude to her in the past.

"Xi laoshi has always been very polite." Ji Limei is a great actress because somehow she makes those words sound believable. "But I'd be happy to practice lines in the future."

He bows to her in the same way a cultivator would, and it draws a charming laugh out of her. "Then, I'll be under your care."

A shadow falls over Xi Zirui, when he looks up, Han Yu is smiling charmingly down at him.

"Didi, can I talk with you?"

"Sure, we can talk."

Han Yu's smile never leaves his lips, but his sharp eyes narrow in annoyance. "In my trailer, if you wouldn't mind."

He doesn't give Xi Zirui the chance to say whether he minds or not, before he's pulling him up by the sleeve, and dragging him along with him.

Han Yu marches Xi Zirui all the way to his trailer, and closes the door with a loud bang behind him, once they're both inside.

His pleasant smile drops as soon as they are alone.

The height difference between them becomes hard to miss, when he presses Xi Zirui against the closed door and looms over him, his right arm braced against the wall.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he asks, his dark eyes glinting in the dimness of the trailer.

---

(1) Me, I'm the foreigner writing a xianxia novel orz

laoshi - lit. teacher, but in this context professional colleague

I feel like I should explain that the thing with the drama's character's names is that the characters in their names, sound like the things Xi Zirui is describing. They kind of work like phonetic puns. Xianren for instance, can mean literally Immortal Daoist, which of course being a cultivator, the character Han Yu is playing is. It doesn't make much sense in English where everything looks the same in pinyin, but the gist of it is that Xi Zirui is supposed to read the character's names, which will be written used unrelated characters to the meanings he's coming up with, but which will have the same tones, thus bringing those odd descriptions to his mind.