Chapter 70 - Who Are You?!

The silence of the darkness permeated every fiber of Zell's essence. [Okay don't panic.] He said to himself to cry and calm himself down. [Since the outside world didn't appear when the sphere shattered it is safe to assume this is all in my mind. Unless breaking this room somehow broke the world… No, that's impossible.]

Zell started taking deep breaths to try and get himself to relax. [Okay Sunea said I need to clear my thoughts.] He said as he attempted to empty his mind once more.

More deep breaths. Zell hoped focusing slowly on his breathing would calm his mind. As he stood there breathing, he felt a hand grab his shoulder. He jerked away and turned to face whoever had touched him, but all he could see was darkness and nothing else. He tried to speak again but his words were still silent. [Am I not alone?] Zell thought to himself. [Is my other self back again?!]

Confused and uneasy Zell attempted to calm himself with more deep breathing and tried to focus his mind.

"Who are you human?" A woman's voice asked, sounding smooth as freshly fallen snow. "Why are you here at the beginning and end? Are you lost? Here let me help you."

As she said those words the world lit up around Zell. The light expanded out from him rapidly and rushed along the ground. Everything it touched revealed a lush green forest with streams and a waterfall. A cloudless sky as blue as he had ever seen. Looking next to himself he saw an old man; it was him before he died.

The old man looked confused and looked at his wrinkled hands. "How is this possible?" He asked.

"What is going on?!" Zell asked in puzzlement. "My voice is back!"

"Yes, human it is wonderful for you to have joined me." The woman said. Zell and his older self could see her now. She was a woman with unmatched beauty, long black hair, large fox ears, and nine furry tails. She was wearing a crimson silk dress with the pattern of eastern dragons embroidered on it. "So would you care to explain why you were at the before and after?"

"I was training to learn magic from a dragon." The older Zell said, which shocked the younger one.

"No, that's what I was doing." Zell said.

"You were both." The mysterious woman replied. "I separated your soul to get a true measure of who you are. A human with two lives and two personalities is quite the interesting thing. For an old man to dwell within a young body is quite another."

"I was reincarnated." The older one said. "I died when my family were murdered. The shock was too much."

"That wouldn't be enough to cause this." She teased. Her eyes lit up with white flames as she peered deeply into the two Zells' souls. "I see the goddess took your memories from you and you grew as another person, creating two lives. You have balance now after training with the young seer, but it is a fragile balance, and you battle yourself from the inside. You are conflicted as to what you should do. Should you continue your life as Zell, or should you live your life as Gary?"

"Me of course!" Both said in unison.

"I see." She laughed. "It seems one of you needs to let go."

"I want to see my family." Gary said.

"I want that… no I don't really care… Why don't I care?" Zell asked, confused.

"Because you are not two sides of the same coin at this moment." She replied. "Each of you are free to express your own thoughts without falling under the influence of the other. So, tell me young one, what do you desire?"

"I want to experience what this life has to offer." Zell said. "I want to have fun and make friends. Of course, I want to save the world, but I want to be able to enjoy my life as well."

"You can still do that and enjoy your life!" Gary said. "I worked my whole life, and I had a ton of enjoyment out of watching my family's happiness!"

"I want to experience my own happiness." Zell replied. "Helping others is fine, but you have to take care of yourself as well. I don't want to miss out on everything just to be a hero."

"Look if we stop the gods, I can see my family again!" Gary yelled. "We need to complete the mission and get powerful. We need to go to that goddess and take my family back from the afterlife!"

"Who's to say your family is even there?" Zell asked. "That goddess is suspicious, and we know her to be a liar. Why would you believe that she told you the truth about your family?"

"Mortal souls do not have an afterlife." The woman said coldly.

"How would you even know?!" Gary yelled. "Who are you?!"

"Oh, you are not ready for that answer." She teased. "Still this goddess you speak of seems to have lied to you. Mortal souls are part of the fabric of existence and as such cannot linger in one place for eternity. They must be cleansed and sent back into the cycle. This is the way of things, there is no god or anything that can change that."

"See!" Zell said. "She lied! Your family is reincarnated somewhere, probably living a good life. They are experiencing happiness that you deny yourself. They are experiencing the life you are denying me."

Gary cast his head down to his feet. He had no good rebuttal if what the mysterious woman said was true. "So, what can I do?"

"Just give up control." The woman said with a smile. "Let this young man live his life, he will still have your memories, as they are his memories now. But the emotional baggage you are forcing him to carry around, that will rest with you. Had that goddess not interfered with your soul this never would have happened. You would have been cleansed and happy living life somewhere else. I am deeply sorry this has happened to you, but your life has ended, and you do not need to keep this boy from living his."

"I understand." Gary said as he walked over to Zell. He put his hand out for a shake.

Zell could not help but to grin as he went in for the handshake