A Lot of Hammering

Could this day get ANY fucking better?!

Ok, yeah that shit with Boss a bit ago was dark but he’ll pull through. Least Zuzu’s with him and Nikita’s on her way to fetch Opal. I would’ve stayed if he asked... but I do think he’ll be a lot happier after I walk in touting me a brand spankin’ new set of armor! One that actually covers up the girls and the booty!

Sorry, ladies. I’ll probably still wear my old ‘armor’ as some casual clothes every now because they make me feel sexy... but hey. I’m a Princess. I look sexy in ANYTHING.

After changing into some casual clothes, me, Meri and Gwin grab the gold we need from the Guild’s vault and head out into town, just us girls. Course the town is still Dewhurst, so it’s not like we can have ourselves a shopping spree or hang out at the bazaar, or... uh. 

I dunno, whatever female friends do whenever they hang out. I didn’t get to leave the castle much and Zuzu was my only real friend aside from some of my siblings and some of my half brothers and sisters. Even then Zuzu’s 17 years older than me...

Fuckin’ hell did I wish I could walk around Imperalis as free as I wanted, though... I love that city and I always thought it’d be nice to go out on the town with friends like these.

In the capital there’s just so much to do and so much to see whether it’s amazing shops or the endless new types of arcane tech littering the streets. Best of all we stuck our criminal element, our poor people and our drug addicts in nice, cozy little (sectioned off) ghettos like any normal cities do. Compared to Dewhurst which... is basically just one large ghetto.

Er. I think my spoiled, sheltered Princess side is showing. Dewhurst is fun, too... in a ‘you never know what’ll happen next’ kind of way.

Gwin leads me and Meri to a dingy little workshop up over on the north side of town. When we get there the first thing I notice is the smell- iron, fire, smoke and... old people? Gods, I hope the old people smell isn’t coming from the fire. Otherwise it's a crappy looking building made of cheap, dirty stone. There’s a sign on display that proudly reads... um... ‘Hrmble Drmbledrn’s’...?

It’s not that I can’t read, the damn thing is just so old and scuffed that I can barely make heads or tails of the letters... I think.

We enter the building and much to my pleasant surprise there’s no old people being burned in the forge. Not as far as I can see, anyway. You can never be too sure in this town...

At the store’s counter sits a very tired, frail looking old man wearing thick rimmed glasses so smudged with coal that I can’t see his eyes, an equally dirty apron and a thick padded tunic underneath. He has a pretty sick looking beard and stache, too. Ain’t surprising, that’s practically in the job description for a blacksmith.

“Sup, Hrmble?” Gwin raises a fist as she jumps up on the counter.

“Hrm hrmdle drn hrm.” The old man, Hrmble(?), returns her eager fist bump. Maybe I really did read the sign right...?

“Ah’m here fer th’ usual. This time I got a friend here who needs herself some big girl armor. Blondie’s one o’ them ‘ah’ll wear a bikini on the battlefield, what could go wrong?’ types.”

“Hrm hrm hrm hrm hrm!” Hrmble laughs so hard he starts crying before looking at me and... um, laughing harder as he wipes a tear from his eye.

“Ah know, righ’?” Gwin holds her belly to contain her own laughter and shakes her head. “Ah’ll be needin’ th’ forge fer an hour or so.”

“Drndle hrm drn.” He nods his head and reaches over the counter for a hammer which he then hands to Gwin. It’s a wooden mallet, not the kinda thing I’d expect a blacksmith to use...

“This guy like your master or something? Is he teaching you behind your family’s back?” I cross my arms and tilt my head. Me and Gwin have a lot in common when it comes to disappointing our families, only in Gwin’s case she hasn’t reached the ‘fuck off forever’ point like I did a couple of months ago.

“Ye, somethin’ like that.” Gwin and Hrmble both laugh like they’re in on a joke that wouldn’t make sense to me and Meri.

“T-that’s very cool of you, Gwin... defying your family to chase your true passions no matter the cost?” Meri blushes and clasps her hands together, “And to think you have such a nice teacher who lets you use his for-”

Gwin uses the wooden mallet to smash Hrmble’s head in and he falls face down onto the counter before sliding down to the ground, plopping down entirely unconscious.

...

“Gimme th’ gold, Sam.” Gwin reaches out with her hand casually towards me.

“Uh no you don’t get to just fucking move on like that was nothing, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!”

“GWIN?! IS HE BREATHING?! OH NO, OH NO...!!” Meri runs to check on Hrmble’s pulse.

“Oh, this? Me an th’ ol’ bastard’ve got ourselves a business arrangement. Ah conk him out cold and he lets me use th’ place fer as long as ah want. Later, Hrmble goes’n reports whatever ah use as stolen goods. Makes his money back’n then some. Been doin this fer YEARS!”

That... would certainly explain why the old man talks the way he does.

Meri looks at Gwin in shock after propping the old man comfortably up against the wall. “T-That’s... oh my Goddess, this is fraud!” She begins sweating nervously. “How haven’t they caught you yet?! A-and wait... wait... if he just gets his money back then what is the money for then?”

Gwin laughs and hops down off the counter. “What, ya think th’ Guild of Blacksmiths gives enough of a shit to check his insurance claims? In THIS town? An’ the money is so he don’t go’n tell mah family, duh!”

“...He’s blackmailing you?” I ask as my jaw drops in disbelief.

“Ye, ain’t he just the sweetest ol’ bastard a gal like mahself could ever ask fer?” Gwin beams and shakes her head, letting out a nostalgic sigh. Then she takes the mallet and jumps up high enough that she can smash the window.

Meri’s panic grows worse, “W-W-W-WHY ARE YOU BREAKING THINGS?!” 

“...Are ya even payin’ attention, Chubs? Gotta make it look like there were a break-in an’ such.”

"B-B-BUT YOU JUST SAID THEY DON'T EVEN CHECK HIS INSURANCE CLAIMS!!"

Gwin rolls her eyes, "Well ye, but what if they DO?"

Meri pouts and nervously shifts around in place. Meanwhile, all I can do about it is laugh and dump the big sack of gold on the counter. “When you said it might not be legal, I thought you were gonna take me to like... a black market shop or something, but this works too! Not exactly in a position to be picky, am I?”

Gwin laughs back with me, “Righ’, this one gets it. Buck th’ fuck up, Meri. Course ya could always head on home by yerself while we stay here.”

“N-NO...! I’ll... I’ll stay.” Meri frowns and shivers at the thought of walking the mean Dewhurst streets alone, unarmored and without her shield. She’s strong as hell and I’ve no doubt she could make it back safe and sound, but heck. I don’t blame her for not wanting to actually make sure...

“Why’d you wanna come along so bad in the first place?” I ask while walking over to the cute little timid girl, smirking wide as I can. I swiftly slip my hands in through her shirt and cop me a feel of those fat, FAT titties and whisper in her ear, “Did ya just want some alone time with me, cutie? All you have to do is ask~”

Meri freaks out and blushes so red you’d think she was standing in front of the forge. “N-Noooo!! It’s just... I was just... um... my dad is a blacksmith. Being around a forge a-and hearing the hammer on iron makes me feel like I’m home. Y-Y’know?”

“Mmm. That righ’?” Gwin walks over to the forge and begins preparing the work station. “He make yer armor now did he? It’s top quality work from what ah’ve seen. Better’n what ah could do at mah level.”

“Yeah! He’s so kind and caring, the best dad a girl like me could ask for. He also made me my flashbangs. I, uh. Didn’t bring one with b-but I was hoping you could take a look sometime and see if you could replicate them? I can’t go all the way back home to get more, and... since I’m actually doing combat missions in Dewhurst I’ll actually need to replenish them at some point.”

“Ah’ll take a look, shouldn’t be too hard’r nothin’.”

“Thanks, Gwin! Um... Sam... could you maybe-”

“Nah.” I snake my hand into her bra and clasp down on her soft, juicy skin. “I’m good, but thanks for asking.”

“Feel free to fuck the bitch, ah’ll be too busy to care while I’m workin’ on her shit. Just c’mon over here for a sec so I can get yer measurements.”

“You got lucky this time, punk.” I whisper naughtily into Meri’s ear and watch the blush on her face become stronger. “But I’ll be back.” Just to make it even worse for my timid little playmate I nibble on her ear playfully and watch her melt.

And sure enough Gwin barely takes any time at all to take my measurements I return to Meri with an even bigger smile! The poor, poor timid girl is trembling and she looks for a place to hide from me, but I surprise her by slipping behind her and pulling her down to sit on my lap over on a couch by the wall. “Got ya!”

“HYAA! D-DON’T, SAM! W-WE’RE NOT EVEN HOME...!”

“Duh, I was just fucking with you. C’mon, there’s an old dude passed out like RIGHT over there. Like I’m gonna try and actually do something to you for real around some man who ain’t Boss.”

“...Oh.” Meri hangs her head as I hug her. “I guess you’re right... we’re his property, after all. It would be shameful for any other man to see our bodies...”

I raise an eyebrow. “...Girl, you went from zero to ‘Perfect Sex Slave’ in barely over a week, and it’s impressive but c’mon. Cool your tits. Boss doesn’t OWN us... he’d have to marry us first~”

Meri goes completely quiet until she slowly turns her head to face me. Her eyes are open wide, a nervous sweat pouring down the sides of her brow. “W-was that actually on the table...?!” She asks in awe as if it were the most exciting idea in the entire world.

Meri then starts mumbling a bunch of junk about how she’s going to introduce Boss to her dad, wedding logistics and all that junk, but it’s all too cute for me to interrupt so I just sit there and let her do her nervous thing.

Poor girl’s got it bad...

Not that, uh... the rest of us in his orbit are much better.

From the couch I have a clear view of Gwin doing her work in the workshop, and damn if it ain’t some of the coolest shit I ever did see. She starts out at a leatherworking station and she fashions some leg and arm sleeves made from, well, leather for me. Using a thick, padded material she brought in from the other room she crafts me a pair of pants and a top similar to Meri’s gambeson to give me some extra protection. Not gonna lie, it all looks pretty bitching!

But damn. The way she moves about the place... and that fire in her eyes... I can’t believe she works so fast! I’m not dumb, I know Dwarves are the best at this kinda crap but... DAMN. And she said she doesn’t even think she’s that good yet? Artists. Guess they really are their own worst critics.

What happens next though, that’s the cool shit.

Soon as Gwin gets done with the under armor junk then she heads back into the other room again for more materials and brings back a bunch of iron and tools that I have no idea what they’re for.

Um...

The next half hour is kind of a blur. I watch the dwarf go to the forge, make it hot, uh... heat the metal... blow air in the forge... hammering!! There was a lot of hammering. Look I don’t know how blacksmiths do their shit, but she probably ran through every step she needed to. Ok? Don’t ask me to explain the process. I’m a lot of things. Princess, Great Blader, tomboy, bitch-y slut, but I ain’t a damn blacksmith.

Gwin ends up making me a wraparound chest plate, two pauldrons, a nice three piece set of faulds that hook around the belt I always wear, and of course matching gauntlets and matching boots. Preeeeetty sure it’s supposed to take a lot longer to make all that shit than just a half hour but hey. Dwarf.

“C’mon over, ain’t nothin’ fancy. Only Spell-songs ah know have to do with woodworkin’... but it’ll keep ya from gettin’ stabbed.” Gwin sighs.

Me and Meri go off to inspect my new set of armor and sure, it’s awesome... but... it’s all pretty dull and colorless. Just normal ass steel.

But right as I start worrying about it Gwin smiles and asks, “Ya wantin’ the same sorta colors as yer ol’ quote unquote armor, ye?”

“Hell yeah!”

A girl’s gotta know what looks best on her, doesn’t she?

Gwin slinks back to the other room and comes back with three little shiny jewels in her gloved hand. Meri and I hawk look at them, they’re really pretty after all! Each one sparkles a different color and they match up to the colors of my old outfit. Wait, I think I heard of these things before... “Those are, uh... Chroma Crystals... right?”

Gwin whistles sarcastically. “Well looky here, th’ bimbo actually knows a thing or two ‘sides suckin’ her man’s dick.”

I laugh and punch her in her Dwarf tits, “Every now and then.”

Meri looks at us blushing nervously. I think she wanted to hang out with ‘the girls’ but neither of us are very... uh... that. Not that she ain’t in her element, she’s used to the forge. She smiles awkwardly and says, “I loved watching my dad use Chroma Crystals. They’re soooo pretty...”

“These little shits changed th’ way people make equipment forever. They’re cheap an’ they’re magic so the color don’ chip off like shitty arse paint.” Gwin takes the two crystals, one red and one gold, in between her thumb and pointer finger and she cracks them. “Main red, accent gold, an’ make them bits there, there an’ there green.”

As Gwin gives them a command the cracked crystals spew out a sparkling glitter cloud of crimson and gold and green that wash over the pieces of the armor and dye them magically. As the magic settles, I finally get a good look at my new completed set of armor.

They’re all done... I... I actually have REAL armor now! Soon enough I’ll even be learning how to use Arts, too! If only we could get access to that dungeon out in the southern woods, then I’d REALLY start feeling like a true adventurer!

“Get on with it, ho,” Gwin dumps all the armor and under armor in my arms and slaps me on the ass as she directs me to the other room. I change into it and thankfully there’s a big ass mirror in there because I... look... BITCHIN.

“Girls... if Boss ain’t in a good mood by the time we get home then he sure as fuck will be when he gets a load of THIS...!!”

(Rough draft drawn by me, I'll replace whenever I get around to doing a full ref sheet... but I'm so behind on the art I should be doing for this series, been too focused on the writing.)