Treasure Chest in the Secret Room

Beneath the expressive painting of Sir Pimpington’s inner demons hides a second completed painting of a completely different person and scenario. At least, I thought it was someone else until I had a closer inspection.

Standing in front of a large, black building on a bustling, cobblestone street is a chivalrous knight of unparalleled beauty. With long, flowing black locks and elegant armor shining like the moon and stars, this knight departs from this building with a warm smile on his sharp-featured face. In one hand, he carries a quest flier, the other rests on the hilt of his rose-themed rapier.

A myriad of people, men, and women alike, watch him in reverence as he departs. But the graceful knight doesn’t pay them any mind. His eyes only press forward onto the unseen horizon, focused solely on whatever his goal might be.

Compared to the painting which lay on top, this one is colored strikingly vibrant throughout. Not a hint of sadness appears anywhere at all in the composition. Rather... it feels warm, optimistic, and adventurous.

As different as his hair, armor, and overall demeanor may be, there’s no denying that the man in this painting is still, in fact, Sir Pimpington. Or, more specifically, it used to be him. Chipping off the paint revealed a title for the painting.

‘Sir Chasteworthe’

“The fuck...?” Sam cocks her head to the side, studying the painting intensely. “That’s him, right? His face is the same, mostly... but... it’s like looking at a mirror world version of the dude.”

Zutiria is equally baffled but brings something up that clarifies a detail for us. ‘Isn’t that the Imperalis Adventurer’s Guild? I had my certification exam there when Theo tried to make me get a job.’

“Shit, you’re right! I’ve seen the place before.” The Princess says. “And that name... pretty sure they’re a noble family, I think. Kinda hard to remember all the nobles in Imperalis I was forced to have dinner parties with, though...”

“What do you make of all this, Master?” Meri asks.

“It’s certainly interesting- but irrelevant as to why we’re here. We didn’t enter this dungeon to learn the sordid history of a pimp’s fall from grace. We came to stop his evil deeds in the present. At best, it will give me psychological ammunition to use against him during the boss battle. At worst, it’s meaningless fluff.”

“I couldn’t agree more, nyaa.” Snow nods her head in agreement, making the golden bell dangling from her collar ring thanks to her neck jostling it.

“Isn’t there anything else?” Cherry crosses her arms and grumpily furrows her brow. “It’d be kinda stupid if the only reward for solving that puzzle was a dumb, secret pimp painting...”

“Maybe there’s something behind it, nyaa,” Peri adds while scratching her kitty ear.

“I was just about to suggest that. Meri?”

At my command, the Shield Maiden takes the painting off of the wall. It reveals a hidden button poking out of the stone behind it, which I then have her press. The cold, rocky dead-end begins to shift, the bricks splitting apart and giving way to an entirely new chamber.

Upon entering, the new locale is a sight to behold. It’s a decently sized t-shaped room that has a narrow brick path leading all the way to a small, empty pedestal. On both sides of the path rests a growing garden of red rose bushes, sprouting from a bed of soil dug into the earth. The artificial magic lighting of the rooms before is gone. This chamber is lit only by the melancholy light flickering from torch-lit sconces protruding along the walls.

Beyond the pedestal and against the backmost wall sits the most striking feature of the room by far- a large, stone statue diorama depicting Sir Chasteworthe on the left, gazing longingly and offering a rose at a woman standing behind a reception desk on the right. His expression is far from the confident, elegant knight we just saw in the painting. Instead, he looks like a lost child or an innocent puppy who doesn’t know how to properly express their needs.

I recognize the woman’s outfit as the standard receptionist uniform that so-called ‘Guild Ladies’ wear in bigger cities, though it wasn’t hard to guess from context clues. Chasteworthe’s paramour is turned away from him as if utterly uninterested in his presence.

“Fuckin’ really?” Sam groans with profound exasperation after feasting her eyes on the statue display. “Swear to god if this dude turned into an evil pimp just because the woman he loved rejected him, I’m gonna be SO pissed.”

“Oh, no... d-do you think that’s what happened to him...?” Meri frowns, a tiny tear forming in the corner of her eye. “That’s so sad...!”

‘The evil man who kidnapped dozens of Beastgirls in order to presumably force them into sexual slavery does not deserve your sympathy, Meri.’ Zutiria sighs, and in response, Meri blushes while hanging her head. It’s not her fault she’s so compassionate, even toward those who don’t deserve it.

Meri, you’re too good for this world.

“Regardless, the scenery dressing doesn’t matter. Someone go up and inspect the pedestal.” I say.

Zutiria walks forward and adjusts her glasses to get a better view. ‘Can you see it, Sir?’

“Yeah,” I zoom in on the camera screen and take in the sight of the stone pedestal located in front of the statue diorama. A small plaque is sitting on the ridge that reads, ‘I will give her all that I have to give.’

“Hah, really? This shit again? Easy. I’ll be back in a sec, gonna go grab one of those silver vases.” Sam starts to strut off with a confident smirk on her face, feeling smart.

“Somehow, I don’t believe that’s right, Mistress.” Snow offers her opinion, and I’m inclined to agree.

“Indeed. The setup for this puzzle, the painting, the statue, the hidden nature of this room in general... it all feels personal. It clearly wants someone to place something on it, but I doubt it wants something random that was found in the dungeon.”

Sam grumbles, slamming her fist silently in the air out of anger. “I thought I had it, too... What the fuck should we give it, then?”

“What indeed...” I start thinking of possible solutions, but Zutiria takes the chance to act on her own.

The little Mage reaches into her adventurer’s pack, taking out the single green stamina potion that I packed for her. She places the glass bottle onto the center of the stone pedestal. ‘I wasn’t going to use it, anyway.’ Zutiria shrugs.

All of a sudden, the fixture begins sinking into the dungeon’s floor until it swallows it up in its entirety, taking the Mage’s potion along for the ride. After a few short seconds of silence, something else rises in its place- a bonafide, honest to goodness treasure chest.

I’ve waited for this moment for so long that I practically hear a choir of Elves singing majestically during its ascension. At long last, there’s a chance one of my girls is about to get a powerup we otherwise couldn’t afford. Of course, there’s also a chance that inside this chest is the key to opening the locked balcony door, but I’m trying to refrain from pessimism.

“Oh, HELL yes! So, who gets to open this bad boy, huh? I-I don’t really mind who does it, I mean...” The Princess practically salivates upon gazing at the treasure before her eyes. Bless her heart, she’s trying so hard to sound less interested than she actually is.

‘I believe I’ve earned that right, Sammy.’ No one disagrees as Zutiria stakes her claim, not even the spoiled Princess. The Mage squats down, inadvertently letting her three-pronged white cape rub the floor in order to open up the decently sized wooden box.

“Wait just a second-” I call out just before her hands touch the lid of the treasure chest.

‘Ah, yes. How could I have forgotten?’ Zutiria catches my drift instantly, and she walks away from the container, getting a nice few feet away. ‘Poke it with your sword, Sammy. You have the longest weapon.’

“...Wha?” The blonde tilts her head, unsure what that the length of her sword to do with anything.

Meri speaks up right away, hiding behind her tower shield and blushing. “I-It could be a Mimic! I’ve read about them... in... in Master’s books...”

“No, Meri, you have to understand-” I begin stammering, and to my left, I feel a certain maid smiling with amusement. “Mimics are... not how they’re so often portrayed in... that specific type of fiction. They would rather eat you rather than, well. Anything else you might have in mind.”

“Oh, thank the Gods. I-I don’t think I’d like to meet one of THOSE mimics in real life...” Meri breathes a sigh of relief while Snow, Peri, and Cherry all giggle in response. 

“How cute,” Snow says with a sadistic look of condescension. “The Myaster enjoys reading lewd tales, does he?”

“You were the one who said it wasn’t the right time for flirting, Snowball.” I remind her. For a brief, split-second moment, I notice Snow’s teasing expression twitch with obvious disappointment.

“Sam, do as she says,” I say to drag the focus back onto the matter at hand, refraining myself from the flirtatious temptations that being around Snow presents.

“Kay. Can’t believe you forgot to see if it’s a Mimic or not, Zuzu. Everyone knows that...” Sam comments with snarkiness in her voice, as if she wasn’t confused by the idea mere moments ago.

‘I was excited. Be silent.’

Sam pokes the wooden box once with her sword’s sharp tip and then does it a second time for good measure. If the chest were a Mimic, it would have reacted to such an attack with searing pain, so we’re good to go. Now that it’s been cleared, Zutiria steps forward and squats over once more onto the cold, stone floor.

She undoes the clasp at the front of the box with her free hand, and it opens with a loud clack. Zutiria hoists the lid open, and a small light shines from within for a brief second. Soon after, it begins to fade, giving her a look at what’s inside. ‘Oh. How lovely. I’ve always wanted one of these, and the rest is a nice added bonus on top of it.’ She says, a genuine smile lifting up her soft, delicate lips as she reaches in to take what’s hers.