Chapter 188 - Shan Shan

Shan Shan paced the length of the room throwing worried expressions at the bed now and then. What was she supposed to do? She had no idea. She had run away here to get rid of Yoo Shiro. Who would have expected that he would chase her right here and wrestle his way into her room. Speaking to herself, she tried to convince herself, "Shan Shan, you are a successful lawyer who is experienced in handling manipulating and lying jerks! You are going to be a mommy soon! So you need to handle this man! Talking and convincing people is your profession! And you are good at it!" However even after the pep talk, Shan Shan realized that she was finding it increasingly difficult to find reasons to refuse him. But.. she needed to think—to be sure, certain, that she wasn't being led by the nose—no, not his nose, but rather her hormones—into committing a deed she would later regret. She had to take a stance, one that she knew was right. 

Her biggest fear was being cheated on and being not loved. The trick her ex and Lu Yeona had played on her had caused her to form a barrier around her heart to protect herself. In hind sight, she realized that it was her teenager self that was mostly humiliated and her heart at least had still been safe. But at this stage she also realized that if she agreed to marry this man then she needed everything. His commitment, heart, mind, and soul, might not be a customary requirement, yet for her, with him, these simply had to be.

She cast a glittering glance his way, the one who had stolen her sleep and was now resting peacefully. She marched to him and extended her hand to wake him up. Then stopped herself. No, if she was within reach when he woke up, she would be under him before she could draw in a breath. Walking around, she leaned over and shook his ankle..

Within a minute, Yoo Shiro had jumped up on the bed, ready to attack, only to fall back when he saw the woman who stood staring at him with her arms crossed.

Raising his eyebrows he looked at the little woman and smiled charmingly, "Darling, why are you out of bed so late in the night. Come to me.." His sleepy seductive voice almost made her forget her resolution and she only moved back at the last moment so that Yoo Shiro's extended hand grabbed thin air. He looked at the disgruntled woman in frustration and asked, "What is it?"

"We need to talk!" The ever dreaded statement of the entire male species resonated in his ear and he almost screamed in horror at what she needed to talk about. Stubbornly, he shook his head. He was not going to take another no from her. Mirroring her stance, he set him own mouth in a pout and argued, "We can talk in the morning. There is no need talk in the middle of the night."

Just as he was about to throw himself backwards, Shan Shan muttered, "Fine! I was thinking of accepting your proposal. But since you do not want to talk about it we will just consider this off the table.."

Before she could say anything more, a wide eyed Shiro stood in front of her, with a big smile on his face, "Darling! You should have told this from the beginning. Any time is the right time to talk about our wedding as long as you agree with it.."

In an about turn from few minutes ago, Shan Shan's hand was held and Shiro walked into the sitting room and stared at Shan Shan with wide expectant eyes.

Suddenly nervous once again, Shan Shan up only to look into his almost ageless omniscient green eyes and pulled in a deep breath. Her mind whirled as she tried to lay down her demands. He was a man who was hedonistic enough that he would throw himself in any fray with a passion that would make any sane opponent think twice. She too had barely held on. And she was sure that he had yet to release any on his tricks. 

Clearing her throat, she muttered, "I am willing to marry you..bu .. " 

Before she could utter the 'but' Shan Shan screamed in exasperation as she was lifted from the sofa and given a twirl. She clutched at his shoulders in terror as her head started to spin. And then when she had yet to catch her breath, he brought her down and kissed her hard, before promising, "Thank you Shan Shan! I promise to you that you will never regret your decision!"

Finally, Shan Shan's mind cleared from the sudden assault and she pushed at the man, hard. Almost in a shrill voice she shouted," Shiro! At least listen to me!"

Shiro froze and this time looked at her with bated breath.. He had naturally heard the 'but' coming .. and had been doing his best to avoid it. It seemed this but was going to be difficult to deal with.

Seeing that he was finally serious, Shan Shan continued," But I have some conditions."

Shan Shan glared at him when he immediately started to nod his head before she had even listed the conditions. "At least listen to the conditions before you nod mindlessly, you dumb fool! So that I would know that you are not just agreeing to pacify me and make me agree but really paying attention!"

Shiro opened his mouth to spout some flowery words about how he was ready to accept all her conditions but her glare made him shut up.

Finally, Shan Shan began," First, if we marry, we must always be able to be honest with each other! If you ever feel that you are not happy, then you must tell me directly! Second, you will have to be loyal to me! If you feel you are attracted to someone else, or want to flirt with someone else, then let me tell you that if you dare to cheat on me, I will cut off your fuc**** ba***!"

This threat caused Shiro to wince and even as he wanted to protest that he would never cheat, he knew that his image as a playboy had been set in her mind and the only way to change that would be through actions.

Seeing that he was yet to protest, Shan Shan nodded and continued, "If we marry.."

"When."

"Huh?" The sudden interruption caused Shan Shan to pause mid sentence and she looked at him questioningly to which Shiro explained," Not if.. when we marry.."

An eyeroll later, "When we marry, we must be in love with each other! So we will marry later and until then we must control out hormones and date each other seriously! You can move in with me or I can move in with you and then we can see if we are compatible! I thought I would be in a marriage of convenience or be a spinster all my life so I did not have many expectations! But after seeing Anna's happiness, I don't want a loveless marriage! During this time, we can see if we can fall in love with each other! And if we can't we will just go our separate ways and do co-parenting!"

A moment of silence ensued and Shan Shan looked down at her intertwined fingers, waiting for his reply. This was of the most important condition to her and she did not know what she would do if he refused to agree with her. When he did not say anything for a few moments, she looked up to see that the place where he was sitting was empty. Her eyes filling with moisture, she was about to get up when Shiro came back in front of her.

He then kneeled in front of her and held her left hand in both of his," Shan Shan, I agree with all your conditions but the last. I cannot fall in love with you in the future."

The tears that had been held back, started to flow out of her eyes as she heard the words. She tried to tell herself that she was not hurt. That she must appreciate his honesty. But it was of no use. She felt broken inside.. So broken that it took a few minutes for his next words to sink in," Because I already love you. So I cannot wait for the future. But since you wish for us to live together then Iwill make preparations to live together so that I can make you fall in love with me.. The night you stole my phone was also the night you stole my heart."

Shan Shan looked up with shocked eyes, straight into his emerald ones. She tried to gauge if he was lying to her but she could only see the sincerity in his eyes. And a little bit of uncertainness that she would not love him back or even look down on him for being unable to get her love. The tears flowing at an even more speed, she replied, "Silly, you cannot make me fall in love with you in the future also! Because I already love with you!"