Chapter 49 - What Is The Catalyst?

Talking with Yasurouka before the homeroom started clarified that she wasn't really pissed at me. Rather, I was confused about her reaction and the things that Kizhashi mentioned. All those things were implying towards a single possibility that was far from my reach at this point. Or this is what I thought then.

Yasurouka may have been interested in me lately, though knowing how her personality is, it could be a mere curiosity on her part. I would rather not arrive at any conclusions right now.

Homeroom was going on, and I was writing down some of the important things that Ms Tachibana was teaching us since our end semester exams were closing in on us, so it was time for me to get a bit serious and actually write down what was going on in the classes.

I noticed Tsumen was glancing at me. I slightly turned my head towards him without taking my eyes off the whiteboard and raised my eyebrows as a gesture to ask him, "what is it?"

He gave me a smug smile and turned his eyes in another direction. I followed his gaze, and he was looking at Yasurouka. I looked back at him, and he wiggled his eyebrows at me with an annoying smile on his face.

I knew it.

He is going to tease me about her now, up until the day the memory reset hits in. I gave him a sharp look which meant , "Are you serious?" And to the reply of my glare, he just laughed while looking towards his feet so that Ms Tachibana doesn't see him slacking off.

I sighed in disappointment and looked at my notebook. Even though my eyes were on the notes I wrote, my mind was somewhere else. After the first two periods, which were Homeroom and English respectively, we had a Mathematics period and a Biology period. Somehow the first half passed. Studying Biology and Mathematics consequently wasn't an enjoyable thing to be honest.

I was standing in front of the vending machine since it was lunchtime. I picked up my choco milk can and started walking back to my class. Tsūmen was with me since all the club activities have now been scheduled to be after school, since our exams were close.

"Do you ever get bored with drinking the same thing over and over again?" He said while staring at my choco milk can.

"Frankly, I don't." I said, while sipping the can. Choco milk was my favourite drink. People are alcohol addicts, I might be a Choco milk addict. As I was thinking that, Tsūmen said, "You milk addict."

I looked at him, and he was laughing. We have these moments sometime where me and him are thinking the exact same thing. And the thing is that we can tell that just by looking at each others' face.

"Sometimes I think that we share the same brain cell."

"Bet" He chuckled. I took another sip from my can and we were near our class when I noticed Yasurouka and Kizhashi talking with a bunch of other girls from our class and some where from different classes near our classroom door.

"You should be more honest with your feelings." Tsūmen commented suddenly. He probably noticed me glancing at her for a split second.

"Huh?" I looked at him.

"I saw you two this morning." He said in a plain tone.

"Doing what?" I decided to press him about this matter, but he didn't reply to that question.

"You know, like I'm sure there is something between you two. So you better take your chance when you still have time." He patted my back with a smug on his face.

"Pretty ironic, hearing this from you." I retorted back.

"I know." He said, and we walked into the class. I was walking towards my desk when Gaisen called me out. I turned around and nodded my head upward with raised eyebrows. It was a gesture for "What is it?"

He had a smile on his face as usual and signalled me to come over to his desk with his right hand. Tsūmen was already sitting and was fiddling with his mobile. I walked over to Gaisen's desk and his smile changed into a smug.

"So, was she angry with you?" He said while looking up at me.

"No, you're right."

"I told you, it was your overthinking." He shrugged.

"Not my fault, she is weird." I said and looked at him chuckling. "Her actions made me think she is mad at me, bruh." I added.

"Ooof, you have to stop being so analytical about things. Try thinking about it with your heart sometimes." He said.

Thinking with my emotions? This was something that I stopped doing after a certain age. I realised that the more you use your emotions to judge things, the more hurt you'll get when your judgement turns out to be wrong.

To judge things, your logical mind is your key weapon. Your mind will never betray you but your emotions will, eventually. For me, I accepted this and decided that rather than sulking over things with emotions and wasting my energy behind them, I just have to accept it realistically.

"I guess." I replied with a sheepish smile.

"Well, you know what happened today?" He said in an excited tone. Looking at the excitement in his eyes, I couldn't say no to him.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing, I was checking your reaction." He said in a plain tone while looking right in my eyes. My sudden urge to punch the shit out him at that moment was unbelievable.

"You son of a-" I thought he was about to say something that happened between him and Kizhashi because he sometimes used to share them with me.

"Ooooof-" He was laughing, while I returned back to my desk.

Sitting in my chair I looked outside the window. The summer breeze swaying the tree branches lightly and the sharp sun rays. Everything is going pretty smoothly now, but the thing that's bothering me is, what is bothering her? Like for Tomose, it was her friends, but what is it in her case? What is acting as a catalyst? And a catalyst to which reaction?

If I can get a hold of the catalyst, then I might deduce the reaction from that. But I have to know the catalyst first.

What was it, that was poisoning her soul?