Chapter 19 - Arc 1 18 – Cabbage Stealing Pig - Die, Die, Die!!

The outdoor paintball field was set in an artificially designed meadow full of greenery for coverage. There was a clear road from start to finish of the track along which there were many bullseye targets set up in various heights and angles.

The game round lasted for 30 minutes, and the winner of the game would be the team with the highest number of scored points. Points were scored by hitting the target, with more points being given the closer the shot was to the center.

However, there was a catch – a single target could only give points to a single team. This meant that teams had to compete to “claim” the targets as their own.

The target would, by default, give points only to the team whose shot was the closest to the center. In the case of a tie, the one who shot first would win out. This meant that it was possible to permanently claim the target by hitting the bullseye.

Besides scoring points by hitting the targets, teams could also lose points if their members were shot by the other teams.

So basically, the goal of the game was to hit as many targets as accurately as possible while avoiding getting shot.

Since there were only three of them playing the game, they could only play against each other with their own one-man teams.

“Young master, I can’t possibly leave you unprotected while I compete against you in a paintball match!” Trey continued to argue, “And besides, playing with you would be overstepping my boundaries as an employee.”

“You are a Shielder, you can keep me safe even if you are not glued to my side. Just create a small shield around me that won’t limit my range of movement, and you can play with peace of mind.”

That… was somewhat true… but how could Trey not know that all of this was just an excuse? Noah didn’t want him to feel left out. He must be thinking that watching two other men have fun playing with guns while Trey just brooded in the corner alone would be sad.

“And also, if I don’t mind, and Levi doesn’t mind, then it isn’t overstepping your boundaries since we are the ones who define the boundaries.”

Noah turned to gaze at Levi with those big pleading eyes, “Brother-in-law, would you mind if Trey joined us?”

Being stared with those beautiful round orbs of light, what could Levi even say besides “No, I don’t mind…”

…while internally thinking, ‘At least I’ll have the opportunity to shoot the shit out of this third wheel.’

And so, with his heart melted into a pool of goo, Trey had no choice but to load his blue paintball gun and prepare for the game to start.

“Oh, and brother-in-law, you are not allowed to use your powers!” Noah declared very seriously, “if you used your powers, how could a little Soother and a Shielder even compare? It would be like having a water race between three contestants, where two are cannoning a boat, and the third is a fish! No suspense at all!”

After letting out a warm chuckle due to the cute metaphor, Levi nodded his agreement. Alright, he didn’t need his power to beat the shit out of a guy who has been trained to defend from guns, not use them. And he certainly didn’t need his power to show off in front of a lovely little guy from a pacifistic family who definitely never wielded a gun before.

“Mn,” It would be more fun to show his prowess through pure gun-wielding skill.

And so…

Ready! Set! Go!!!

With the loud ding, the three started from the same starting point.

For the first 60 seconds, players weren’t allowed to shoot each other, so all three bravely darted forwards trying to find cover before the time was up.

Trey went for targets, trying to quickly go through the entire course. He’d approach the target, get a good shot, and then dart back into the bushes.

Levi went for a high vantage point, so he could observe the positions of his two opponents. He wanted to wait until PvP become allowed so he could shoot down Trey as many times as possible. And while he waited, he also wanted to feast his eyes on the cute little guy struggling to shoot a target.

Noah went up to the first target and tried out his gun.

When the two saw how far off the mark his shots were, both of them found his pursed lips and wrinkled nose too cute for words. In their hearts, they have already designated each other as their only real obstacle to victory.

And thus, at first, the atmosphere was very sporty, with the Trey and Levi thinking how to show themselves in the best light to their observing cute little kitten:

‘Little master, did you see that beautiful shot?’

‘Oh, the little guy is watching, have to show him my best side! Over here! Look at me, cute little kitten!’

‘Did you see that, little master? Your Shielder is fully capable of protecting you for the rest of our days!’ ╰(*°▽°*)╯

‘Did he catch me using my power to seem more imposing? Shouldn’t be… it was just a little. And wasn’t for cheating purposes, so it’s fine?” (; ﾟ 3ﾟ )~♪

But then slowly it turned into something less civilized and more…

“This bastard has been antagonizing me the entire day, this is a golden opportunity to pay him back for all the temper tantrums AND impress my darling employer!” (≖‿≖)

“I’ll show him why he should keep his nasty little paws off my little cabbage!” (≖‿≖)

“Eat my bullets, you rich second generation!!” (ꐦ▔皿▔)

“Cabbage stealing pig - die, die, die!” (ꐦ▔皿▔)

“Pew, pew, pew! Ha! How do you like that?!” (°ㅂ°╬)

The image of two grown men acting like twelve-year-olds was simply too beautiful for words. Noah nearly cracked a rib trying to hold in his laughter every time one of them was sent flying.

The first round thus came to a close with two grown men engaging in intense yet very childish guerilla warfare, trying to shoot each other down in every way possible while still looking majestic in the eyes of their cute observer. And the mentioned observer, who leisurely trailed behind the two, getting used to the gun and slowly improving his aim with each shot.

When the ding sound signaled the end of the round, the two black-haired men were drenched in sweat, and glaring heatedly at the still empty scoreboard as if trying to drill a hole through it with their eyes.

Noah slowly skipped towards them, the only sign he had just been through a paintball match being his ruddy cheeks.

It didn’t take long for the game to calculate the scores and declare the winner. The reason why Noah viewed this game as a sci-fi version of paintball was because both the targets and the gear on their body were electronic devices that knew when and where they were hit by whom and calculated the score automatically.

Even the paint inside the bullets wasn’t ordinary paint but was made with a substance that evaporated quickly and would turn transparent after being exposed to the air for a couple of hours or if an electric current ran through it. This meant that after the round was done, their colorful paint-covered targets and protective equipment would clean themselves and need no wiping.

The scoreboard finally updated with big fanfare showing the scores of all three.

…the fuck? （　ﾟДﾟ）

The fiery heat in the eyes of the spirited duo got drenched by cold water, and both froze on the spot.

Then with wide eyes and in complete sync, they rigidly turned to look at the grinning Noah.

“Hehe,” Noah didn’t even attempt to hide his glee at their colorful facial expressions. He even coyly pointed his gun in the air and blew on the barrel as if blowing off smoke, “While a wolf and a bear are embroidered in a fight over a fish, it is the fox that ends up running away with it in its mouth.”

…how do you run off with yourself in your mouth? (／≧ω＼) The two’s hearts felt tickled by the sheer cuteness of the little guy, but their wounded manly pride refused to accept defeat. They huddled together to look through the virtual representation of the track and see how the hell such a small and cute vixen managed to steamroll them.

That’s right! They got steamrolled! Their two scores combined and doubled weren’t as high as Noah’s score!! ○|￣|_