Chapter 183 - The Moon Mourned

When the thought of wanting to be his first kiss popped up in her mind, Lina's entire body froze.

This made her recall the question that Stacy had asked her the previous night.

'Do you already like him?' 

Those words repeatedly echoed in her ears.

Lina turned around to lie on her back and blankly stared at the white ceiling.

"Do I like him?" She muttered to herself.

'I like him as a friend… but I like him more than a friend at the same time!' She groaned in frustration at her own conflicting emotions.

She was sure that she liked him but what was the percentage of 'like' she had for him?

Now that was the real question.

"I like Noah as a friend too but I've never had the fantasy to kiss him senseless!" She widened her eyes when she thought of her predicament in this way.

"Neither do I want to kiss Benji or Leon or Derek or Ren!" She declared and sat up straight.

Ren was one of her best friends who was dating her other best friend, Gwen.

Those were all the men that she was close to and she had never felt the need to kiss them.

"Not like the NEED I felt when I stood at close distance with Ruby!" She blurted out and blushed, making her cheeks turn a soft pink.

The kiss, the warmth in her heart, the knot in her stomach all indicated that she had special feelings for Reuben Ming.

Feelings she was now sure that were meant for someone who was definitely more than just a friend.

However, she still wished to see the efforts that the man was willing to put up in order to court her.

Her thoughts halted when she recalled Reuben's almost revelation about him courting her.

"Huh? Ruby does keep using 'court' rather than 'date'." She wondered why that was.

If he was planning to date her then that would mean that it may or not be with the intention of securing their future together with each other.

However, the word 'court' was used when the man had already made up his mind on leading the relationship to the final stage which was MARRIAGE.

This thought caused another wave of 'butterflies doing a flash mob in her stomach' kind of emotions to surge in her heart.

"Would I be willing to date Ruby with the intention of marriage in mind?" She asked herself with an uncertain expression.

She was aware that her expectations of love and marriage had been warped thanks to all the novels she had read.

She wanted the blazing hot romance written in them but at the same time, those novels also had numerous soul-shattering heartbreaks in them.

'Will Ruby be like those men who would leave their girlfriend or wife to have other women outside?' She frowned and shook her head.

'No… no…! Ruby doesn't seem like that kind of a man.' She defended but was still doubtful.

She did not want to judge a book by its cover because things might not always be as they appear on the outside.

'Even the most faithful MC cheated on his pregnant wife in that novel.' She grimaced when a certain novel came to her mind.

While the FL was bedridden due to a mishap during her pregnancy, the ML had attended a party where he got drunk to forget his worries and anxieties.

But not only did he forget his worries, he even forgot about the wife who was waiting at home.

The next morning he woke up with a severe headache and a naked woman by his side on the messy and used bed.

'That was so heartbreaking to read! I don't think I am strong enough to live through that trauma!' Lina's eyes welled up when she thought of the scandal that followed in the story.

The weak FL, heartbroken due to this betrayal left her home and moved abroad to forget all about her cheating husband.

'They spent 6 years apart! She had to raise the baby on her own and had to struggle to make ends meet until she rose to the top in her career.' She pumped her fists while thinking of the character development that took place.

However, at the end of the novel, it was revealed that the ML never really slept with the woman and that they had fallen into the trap of a love rival who tried to separate them.

'The rival succeeded in separating them but she never succeeded in getting his heart.' She cheered for the FL who got back with her soulmate after a lot of twists and turns.

"But am I strong enough to bear such pain?" She grimaced when she imagined herself in that MC's position.

"Will I be understanding enough to listen to his explanations rather than making assumptions and running away?" She mulled over this issue with a stern expression.

She was aware of the fact that communication was an important part of any relationship.

Nevertheless, what's the use of communicating when the other person does not understand what you feel?

After all, she had grown up watching her parents yell at each other until the other person understood what they were feeling.

They had worked hard to maintain their relationship which stayed strong even to this day.

The major reason for that was they were in sync with each other.

They were upfront with what they wanted and what they wanted was to stick to each other until they were all wrinkly and grey.

Lina wanted the love that was meant to last a lifetime and not just something that could be broken off on a whim.

She wanted to properly go through the stages that would lead her to the final door where her soulmate would be standing to welcome her with open arms.

She could have just started dating Reuben right after they kissed but then she would miss out on getting to know him as a normal person.

Because if they were dating, then he would become her 'boyfriend'.

Their honeymoon phase might be spectacular but what about the days after that phase ended?

Without a proper foundation, how were they supposed to weather the storms that life would toss them into?

This was why, even though she knew that she had special feelings for him she decided to make him court her with all his might.

"I am not forcing him into anything. He can give up any time he wants." She shrugged as though she did not care about what he would do.

'But I hope he doesn't!'

Though her mouth said those words, her heart was the only one who was speaking the truth.

While Lina was coming in contact with her inner feelings about Reuben and her future, there was someone who was not doing too well at the moment.

___

In a cold and dusty place, there was darkness everywhere and the only source of light were the broken windows through which the moonlight shone inside.

However, it seemed as though even the moon was afraid to show itself because it was quickly hidden behind the thick dark clouds that swarmed the sky.

The atmosphere here was eerie and had an ominous feeling surrounding the entire place.

The building looked empty with just a few broken furniture discarded in it.

Footsteps in the distance could be heard. 

Footsteps that were fading away with every second that passed.

The eerie silence resumed in this abandoned place but it was soon broken.

The entire area did not have a single soul in sight which only made the place look scarier.

"Haa… Ur-ggh… H-ha…" The painful groans of a man sounded from a distant corner on the top floor of this abandoned warehouse.

The moon peeked from behind the clouds and a figure was visible on the dust piled floor.

A figure laid flat on his face with no movement coming from him.

One would have thought of him to be dead due to his stillness if it wasn't for the incoherent groans that were heard every few seconds.

Clothed in dark clothes, the man appeared to be in a lot of pain as he huffed in a feeble attempt to catch his breath.

With every breath he inhaled, he coughed up blood until his face was covered in his own blood.

Gurgling sounds that could only be from the blood filling up his lungs were now heard.

The man tried his hardest to move, to call out for help but all that his weak body could conjure right now was the pitiful whimpers that emerged due to the pain.

The slight movement that his body had made caused his wounds to bleed with much more vigor than before.

His eyelids were slowly blinking shut and his breathing lowered.

The excruciating pain that was radiating through his body was beginning to fade gradually.

He knew what this meant but he found the idea of escaping this pain to be very soothing.

His body's temperature was lowering at an exponential rate and his eyelids finally touched each other which had been longing to meet for a while now.

'Is this the end for me?' His thoughts began to fade as well.

The lack of oxygen to his brain was shutting it down and his body was now stopping all functions.

The blood-filled lungs gasped to draw in a few short breaths which only resulted in the pain to reappear.

Grimacing at this last burst of pain with his eyes still closed, his lips formed a bitter smile before it faded along with his consciousness.

'I'm sorry, Nana…' His last words were for the one he longed for the most.

Following this, all sounds in the abandoned warehouse ceased to exist.

The moon, as though it was mourning for the man on the floor, shone on him brightly before concealing itself behind the clouds bringing about absolute darkness.