Chapter 1 - 001: a memory

A lone boy sits in his bed and staring out of the window, his eyes are unfocused and his mind is completely in a mess. He has a problem with his heart and lungs from when he is in high school and he must stop his dream to attend a college because of his health issues.

His condition has become more severe in the last two years and a year ago he must make a painful decision, that's... break up with his girlfriend.

Just for something like pride and hope...

This decision is something that not just hurt the girl but also the boy.

Pride, because of this shitty word he must break up with his girlfriend because he feels he can't match her with freelancers status and a broke man that just can sit in his bad every day or you can call him a neet?

Hope, and because of this word, he steels himself and makes this difficult decision. Because he hope she will find her happiness without need to worry about his health issues, because he hopes she can achieve her dream, because he hopes she can attend the college and graduate with a very excellent grade, and because he hopes.. with this she can find a right man who can make her life full of happiness..

"Maybe I'm really a selfish person, or maybe I just a greedy person... "

Every day the boy feel a regret

Every time he sees her picture with her new boyfriend he always wondering

Why I'm not there?

Why I'm not the one who holds your hand?

Why I'm not the one who you hold dear in your eyes?

Why I'm not the one who share happiness with you?

Is the decision I take is wrong?

Am I wrong in the first place?

And the worst news he gets is coming this morning

A letter of invitation to her wedding

From the girl who shares love and sorrow with him for 5 years...

From the girl who confesses to him when they're in their last year of junior high school...

Because they're in the same class they can study together, complete the homework together, walking home together and graduate together.

But all of this just become a memory

A memory that erases with a page of invitation letters

A smile surfaced in the face of the boy

A smile full of unwillingness

And the eyes that full of regret slowly close and never open again.