Like Yae said, I have been wanting to spend time with Miyako. Even though I wasn’t that vocal to that, I expressed that sentiment even back during that karaoke. And it also extends to all of my girls.
Even without me saying it, they’re surely aware of that given that they too were trying to adjust their schedule just to be with me even if it’s just a few minutes.
Yua actually always sends me photos of her wearing fashionable clothes while posing like a model. The girl was sharpening up her modeling capabilities as preparation for that audition in the coming month.
It’s only a few days away from June. That audition was already looming over her head. She confessed to me that she’s a little nervous about going back to that industry. From what she experienced, even if I saved her and it was covered up to not affect her normal life, it was still traumatizing. She would have a hard time trusting those photographers again, no matter how professional their credentials were.
Although she opened up to me, she hadn’t told her mom about it yet. That’s why I told her that I’ll help her to calm her nerves by doing this trial modeling.
Fortunately, it’s somehow going well. I already had a folder of her modeling photos in my phone, keeping it safe. She’s also wanting to do live modeling, with me as her photographer but as someone who could only do sneaky shots, I doubt I would be able to highlight her charms through it. But since it was her request, my mind was already shouting yes to it.
The same as Yua, the other girls who I couldn’t see every day were creating their own way to satisfy their longing and even if it would eat my free time, I would gladly indulge them in it. That’s the least I could do for them…
They’re afraid that I would forget about them if they couldn’t see me or talk to me. However, I was more afraid. Afraid that they might find it exhausting to cling to me given that I couldn’t always be with them. What kind of boyfriend am I? I’m even worse than those in a long-distance relationship.
Uh… But it’s better to keep that sentiment in my mind. If I can be afraid that things won’t go well for us, then I just have to do something to prevent that from happening.
“Your forehead is creased. You’re thinking about other things again. I thought you wanted me here with you? After they give way to us, you’ll just get silent there.”
Pulling me out of another bout of overthinking, Miyako peered over by putting her beautiful face right in front of me. On her lips, a pout was apparent.
Our dinner has already ended and I’m sitting on my old bed with her by my side. Earlier, Akane, Nao, Yae and Miwa-nee collectively agreed to push us into this room right after cleaning the table because I was reluctant to just disappear with Miyako when all of them were there.
Well, it’s just too obvious to them how much I wanted to be with Miyako. After that little playful act by the three when I arrived, I only went to greet Nao and Miwa-nee before sticking close to Miyako.
Even Minoru couldn’t help but ask why I was acting like a baby to the girl.
Miyako, on the other hand, acted indifferent with her eyes rolling at me. But she didn’t have it in her to push me away from her. In fact, she’s secretly loving how affectionate I was.
She’s just doing it to save her face from embarrassment and teases that the other four might throw at her.
From what I heard from Yae, it took her four days getting the girl to agree to come with her for a sleepover. This girl was too adamant about keeping up with what she wanted; me personally inviting her.
She understood that I couldn’t do that easily yet that’s what she’s wishing for. That’s something I want to fulfill in the future.
Well, I didn’t just easily fall into a trance. Because right on my lap, her sketchbook was opened on the page that pushed me to it.
No. It’s not my portrait. But something she drew that probably represented our complex relationship’s current state. A small island in the middle of a lake. Not a sea since there was land depicted on all sides just that the lake seemed to be an abyss, it’s deep and dark that once a person sank in it, there’s no way to swim his or her way up. There’s no boat or any other ship that could ferry them to the lands beyond but the lack of it means it’s possible to build one. There were people there but they were all located in the middle of the island, circled around a small cottage.
I guess one can also call it an isolated island, located at the center of the world. The escape from it was either to drown in the abyss or to cross the river and return to the land
Since that was only a sketch, it’s colorless and only presented using simple details. She still had to paint it to properly convey the artistic meaning of it.
Going by the same line of thought, I shouldn’t have made the connection to our situation, right? But as soon as I caught sight of it, all of their faces flashed in my mind and along with that, the hardship we’re facing by staying in this complex relationship.
“Uh… I admit, I fell into deep thought from seeing this… Miyako, does this have a meaning?” I picked up the sketchbook and pointed at the page at what she drew.
“No… It’s a sketch, numbskull. I still haven’t even thought of painting that.”
“Right… I overthink it again, huh?”
“Was there ever an instance where you didn’t overthink? It’s your habit.” Miyako scoffed at me again but soon after doing that, she put her head on my shoulder as she glued herself closer to me.
Noticing that, I placed my arm over her shoulder, holding her closely.
“It’s a habit, yes. Will you believe me if I tell you…” I nodded and proceeded to tell her what I thought of upon seeing her sketch.
At first, she was intently listening to what I was saying but as I started linking it to our situation, Miyako started giggling before calling me a ‘numbskull’ again.
By the time I finished, Miyako grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and pulled my head down.
While still having an amused smile on her pretty face that’s too much in contrast to how she was a month ago, Miyako blew air to my face before opening her mouth, “You might be right with your interpretation but wait until I finish painting that, alright? This situation with you isn’t filled with hardship but I also won’t say it’s easy. But even if that’s the case, you’re always there to lift us up. So while the problem starts with you, everything also revolves around you. If you’re unhappy, I bet every one of us will be the same.”
Miyako then pushed a finger on my lips, preventing me from talking. She shook her head and continued.
“Being by your side again, I’m certain they’re feeling the same way as I do. Especially now that you’ve changed. Your emotions are always written on your face whenever you’re with us. You noticed it yourself, why do you think we won’t notice? Still, if we loved you back then… Even more so today. Our Ruki has grown up, it’s about time we do too. That way, we can keep up with you and remain as your special someone.”
As soon as the last word left her mouth, Miyako grabbed her sketchbook from my hand and placed it on the bedside table. And with my lap opening up, she pulled the blanket covering us down as she climbed up and straddled me.
Because she’s in an elevated position, I had to raise my head to stare at her and from there, I saw the lovely and cheery girl that I stole before, devoid of the gloom that covered her whole person in the latter half of the previous school year.
Miyako then lowered her head, her smooth fragrant hair brushing across my face. With our eyes staring heatedly at each other, my idle arms wrapped around her before welcoming her puckered lips with my mine… “I hate that I love you.. Yet I love being with you… So much that I can’t step away from your light even if I tried to do so.”