Chapter 460 - Intoxicated

Yan Chu's words seemed to have hit a buŧŧon and Su An An put down her chopsticks immediately.

Su An An stood up as she looked at Yan Chu with tears filled eyes, "I know you don't like me, and you are only here to protect me because Boss said so. However, can you stop doing all these things that make me feel otherwise? You make me feel as though you cared about me truly from the bottom of your heart. You make me feel as though I am special. However, whenever I try to ask you, you push me away, you draw the boundaries, you draw the lines! Then, you look at me with those gentle eyes again and care for me as though I am the most important person in your life. But then you snap again as though I am some dirt in your life and push me away again! I am tired of this! If you don't like me, then stop being so nice to me! Your care for me is like poison! I get intoxicated by your kindness but then you slap me in the face again and push me to hell when you turn cold again!"

Tears rolled down Su An An's eyes as she spoke, and she turned away immediately when she was done talking.

Su An An couldn't bear to face Yan Chu in the face after saying all those things and neither could she handle having him snapping at her again.

Su An An knew that it might seem foolish and maybe even stupid to many other people that she had fallen in love so quickly and so deeply within mere weeks, but she was very sure about how she felt because she was the only that knew what she was feeling. She had really fallen in love deeply within a short time. She believed that Yan Chu was worth fighting for and worth loving. She loved everything about him, even his flaws. It wasn't that she was foolishly in loved that she loved his flaws but it was because she knew what his flaws were, and she accepted them because she too had flaws that he had accepted.

Yan Chu was stunned by Su An An's sudden outburst and her words stabbed him straight in the heart like arrows. It hurt him so much that he could only remain silent so that he wouldn't crack in front of her. His silence hurt her even more that she couldn't bear it any longer and decided to walk away. Seeing that she was about to leave, he knew that he had hurt her too much and he might just lose her forever. That realisation made him spoke instantly.

"I am scared…"

Su An An was shocked when she heard Yan Chu's reply that she turned around to face him immediately.

Yan Chu didn't face Su An An this time as though he was afraid of her finding out his fears. He looked down as he fidgeted with his fingers. Meanwhile, she kept quiet as she waited for him to continue whatever he wanted to say.

"I am scared of getting hurt again… I don't know if I have the ability to love someone again… I am afraid that if I accept your feelings, I might end up hurting you one day…"

Yan Chu clenched his fist tightly as he spoke softly as his fears started to surface in front of Su An An.

Su An An looked at Yan Chu in shock and surprise because his words probably meant that he had feelings for her too, but he was just afraid of getting into a relationship again.

Su An An swallowed the lump in her throat before she spoke, "Were you hurt by your ex?"

"She betrayed me and played around with me just so that she could use me."

"I am not her, so I won't hurt you like she did. I don't know how she played around with you, but I am not the kind of person that would play with other feelings. I am honest to my feelings and I am still young, so my mind isn't contaminated by any other thoughts. Hence, you can be sure that I won't be using you and my feelings are genuine and pure," Su An An spoke in a definite voice.

"I know you are not her, but I am still me. I don't know if I am still pure or whether my feelings could be pure and genuine like you…"

Su An An then continued in a firm voice, "I also have no intention of using you and I definitely do not have any other man in my life, except for my father."

Yan Chu looked up immediately when he heard her words as he was shocked by whatever that she had said. It wasn't the words itself that shocked him. It was the reason why she had said them that shocked him.

Yan Chu knew that Su An An was still trying to fight for a future with him and she wasn't afraid even after whatever that he had told her. This knowing fuelled the fire and love in his heart and he suddenly felt all pumped up. He felt the energy and the strength he needed to fight for her and their future together.

Su An An then looked at Yan Chu in the eyes as she continued, "I am also worried about what I would be facing by choosing this route, but I believe that as long as I know that you have feelings for me and you wouldn't leave me, then I have nothing to be afraid of. I will be able to become strong so that we can fight for our future together. I will be strong so that you will feel safe as well. I know I am young, and you would think that I give in to temptation easily, but I can ȧssure you that as long as you love me, I wouldn't leave you."