Chapter 318 - Stunned

ELRETH

As Tarkyn and the others began to ask questions about the travels and numbers, logistics, and security concerns, Elreth sat back. She should be listening, should be keeping herself focused. But she struggled to even think.

Next to her Aaryn had gone very still.

Anger flared in her chest. He should have told her! At least as much as he knew, she should have known. She shouldn't have been meeting this so blind. So utterly naïve to what had been happening.

Why? Why hadn't he trusted her?

But when she turned to look at him, she swallowed back the accusing questions that had bubbled to her lips.

Aaryn sat back in his chair, one arm bent up and his temple rested on his fist. To a casual observer he would look thoughtful and mostly relaxed. But she could see the lines of tension in his neck and shoulders, saw the tiny jiggle in his thigh as he fought tapping his heel.

She saw the blank stare in his eyes, fixed on the floor in front of him.

It came home to her, then, all the things he was dealing with.

A new mate. Losing his own Alpha position, but still expected to hold a dominant role in the hierarchy. His mother's… sort-of death. And now this.

He'd been lied to as well, she realized.

But that just made her anger bubble again. He at least knew what was happening! He at least knew who was involved!

Elreth rolled her head on her neck and talked herself down. Being angry at her mate, even at her brother and mother wasn't going to help any of this. She had to put herself and her emotions aside and figure out what the hell she was going to do with this information.

Her mother and brother were leading a group within her people, empowering them. And for good reason. Elreth didn't doubt that the prophecy was real—her mother wasn't given to fancies like that. And obviously they had some evidence that the disformed—the Protectors—could do something other Anima didn't do.

But there was far, far too much that she still felt like she didn't understand.

Elreth looked back, wanting to ask a question, but Tarykn was talking to her mother—who glanced at Gar, then rubbed her palms on her thighs. She didn't seem as emotional, as weak as she had a few minutes ago. But Elreth didn't like seeing her so off balance.

She could tell by the set of her father's shoulders that he was bracing to shield her if this went bad.

Elreth frowned, why would her father feel like her mother needed protecting here? Then she turned her attention to Tarkyn and realized he was on the edge of his seat, his hands gripping his thighs so tightly his knuckles were white, and when he spoke, the words ground out.

"Only fifty? Are you certain?"

"No, we can't be certain. I haven't lined them up and counted," her mother said, exasperated.

Tarkyn turned on Gar. "You have trained enough to understand the importance of organization. Can you truly tell me you don't know to the head?"

"Truly," Gar growled, his jaw tight. He was feeling protective as well, Elreth realized. What was going on? "Our focus hasn't been on filling a quota, Tark, it's been on finding the right people for the job. We didn't limit numbers beyond suitability."

She waited until her mother had gone back over their estimated numbers for Tarkyn, before she broke in.

"What is it, exactly, that the disformed can do? What makes them Protectors? You say you chose numbers by suitability. Are they all capable of this, or only some?"

"They're all capable of it in a functional sense," Gar said, then shared a glance with their mother and Elreth was stabbed by a hot jab of anger again… and some jealousy, she realized. "But they need to have the right character. That's how we choose."

Character for what? Fighting? But her brother was staring at her mother again and Elreth felt… abandoned. She looked at her father, but he was staring at her mother. Elreth was surprised how isolated she suddenly felt from her family. As if… as if she'd been at the center a moment before, and now was suddenly outside a circle, staring over their shoulders at what was within it, and wishing she was there.

Then a soft touch startled her and she turned to find Aaryn leaning into her ear. "They have the best intentions," he breathed into her ear. "Me too."

Then he sat back, holding her eyes until she nodded.

"It's clear to me that I won't understand everything you're bringing until I've seen what is actually going on behind the scenes. Tomorrow you'll take me to the disformed. You'll show me everything. Everything," she said firmly, looking between her mother and brother.

Gar nodded, but her mother's eyes went wide. "El, there's so much, we won't possibly—"

"As long as it takes," Elreth growled. "I don't care. I need to understand what is happening in my people. In my world! You have had your role to play, and I have no doubt that I'll come out of this grateful you were there and you were obedient to it. No doubt at all," she forced herself to say. "But right now, I am blindfolded and my ears plugged, in a dangerous swamp. The time has clearly come, you even said yourself, for these secrets to be laid bare. So I'm sorry, Mother, Gar, beginning tomorrow morning, you will walk me through every step of what you have been doing, how, and with who. And then we'll figure out how you have equipped these Anima to meet the coming threat.

"Tarkyn, I understand that this is important to you as well, but for now, place the bulk of your attention on finding that human and their weapon!" she growled.

Tarkyn opened his mouth and Elreth glared at him. She must have put her Alpha power behind it without realizing, because Tarkyn looked like he'd just tucked his tail over his balls. He saluted her, his face tight. "Yes, of course."

"Gar, there's no room for you to waver. These are your people now. I need to understand exactly what resources and skills are there to know how I can use them. You'll meet me before breakfast and go over… whatever details I have decided are the most important to understand."

"Don't forget, we are here to help in this also, Elreth," Lhern interjected. "You do not have to handle this on your own."

She turned to the older male, and scanned all the council members then. "Thank you," she said after a moment. "And I will not forget you. Your wisdom and thoughtful advice will be very necessary in the coming days. But for now… for now I need to understand what and who I rule. I will ensure you are also walked through what is going on in the disformed. Together… we'll do this together," she said with a sigh.

Then she turned to her mate who was staring at her sadly.

And she remembered that their lives would not end—at least, not yet. That they still had to navigate everything else as well.

And for a moment, she almost drowned under the weight of it all.

But she didn't.. And damned if she was going to.