AARYN
Aaryn knew Tarkyn and the other disformed were lost—unaware of, or at least, not entirely comprehending the magnitude of what Reth had just told them all. What he'd just told Gar and Elreth.
The family—his family—all went still. Gar in shock, Elreth stunned, and their parents humbled.
Everyone knew Gar and Reth butted heads. But they'd done a good job of hiding the depth of their conflict from the people. Apryl was clever though, with razor-sharp instincts. And Tarkyn probably knew more than anyone outside the family.
They all knew this was big, they just weren't aware how massive this moment was in Gar's life.
Aaryn was. And he also knew that Gar was off balance—which was the time he was most likely to step forward with an inappropriate joke or worse, anger. So Aaryn launched in before Gar could get his mental feet under him again.
"That's really awesome of you to say, Reth," he said. Elia gave him a grateful look. "I know I've watched Gar do some amazing work, and Elreth's… well, Elreth. They'll both do you proud in this. I know they will."
Reth nodded, his eyes flicking back and forth between his children.
Aaryn caught Apryl's eye and gestured for her to keep going. She blinked, then cleared her throat. "So, uh, our first training with a new disformed who has proven their character, is to have the final test, where we bleed them, then have them touch the portal and make sure it recognizes them. Aaryn, have you ever done that?"
Aaryn froze. He hadn't expected to play a role today. "No, I haven't—"
"Why don't you give it a try. I'm not asking you to step inside, just bleed and make sure the portal responds."
He knew everyone was tense and there was still a need to keep their attention moving, so reluctantly, Aaryn stepped forward. When he reached Apryl he held out his hand. She took it, piercing his skin with the point of her blade, then tipping her head towards the Portal.
"Hold your arm up in front of you and see if the portal glows. If it doesn't, don't go near it. But if it does, put your hand into it—just your hand. Don't worry, the blood will protect you."
Aaryn's heart raced, pounding so hard he could feel it in his skin. He hadn't expected… he'd decided against taking the traverse training because it hadn't been the direction he was being led. Or leading. But now… now, if he was going to protect Elreth… maybe this was the answer.
He nodded quickly, then raised his wrist, face out, and stepped towards the portal. The air shimmered again, twisting with that blue light.
"Go ahead," Apryl murmured from behind him.
Swallowed hard, Aaryn put his hand into the portal, shivering a touch when the gateway seemed to suck in around his skin, that blue light burning so brightly it was almost white, twisting towards his wrist, and pulling in around him as he put his hand through it.
The scent of that place—dark, dusty death—wafted out where he pushed in, though it felt as if it stuck to his skin and he didn't break through, the bone-chilling cold of it made his fingers ache.
"That's enough," Apryl said. "Don't go any further."
Aaryn looked down and realized he'd pushed his hand through almost to the shoulder and was beginning to inch closer to the portal. He hurriedly stepped back.
"It's like it… calls to you," he said breathlessly when all of him was back in the cave tunnel. "I didn't even notice."
Apryl nodded. "It's why we have to be so careful with it. Even though it's evil and people can tell that when they scent it, they're still pulled towards it. And when you get inside and realize they're there with you, and they know things about you…" she shuddered, shaking her head to rid herself of the memories. "I've been across dozens of times," she said quietly, "and it never gets easier. Some days… some days it's harder."
"What makes it harder?" Elreth asked.
Apryl sighed. "We all have different experiences. For some of us it's because we're tired or discouraged. Anything negative seems to bloom in that place. So if you walk in feeling a little bit afraid, once they start talking, you're terrified. Or if you walk in with a little bit of ambition, they'll play on that and pretty soon they're filling your head with images of how it could be if you just gave in—all the things they'd give you. And it feels real. It is real!"
"How can you say that?" Elreth gasped. "Aren't they evil? Don't they lie?"
"Yes, but they also tell the truth and it's all mixed together. You need to understand, Elreth, these… things, whatever they are, they have real power. And sometimes that power will make it really, really easy to believe them. The temptation is real. The fear is real. And if anyone gives in, you're going to find out that the consequences are even more real."
Elreth's face paled. Aaryn stepped over to stand at her shoulder, taking her hand when she reached for him.
"How many have you lost?" she asked quietly.
Apryl became hesitant for the first time, then looked at Elia.
Elia sighed. "To our knowledge, we've only lost two. But we've had some who… who couldn't become Protectors because they came so close to giving in they almost killed themselves and… whoever they were taking across." Elia's eyes closed and her face went gray as Reth snapped his head around to face her. Then, when she didn't look at him, he looked at Gar and then Aaryn.
"How bad was it?" His voice was deep, trembling.
Aaryn opened his mouth, but it was Gar who spoke.
"I told you, Dad, it's about making sure that whoever gets lost is someone we can afford to lose. That's why I do this now, because the ones they almost lost before had families and… they were needed."
Reth's face became incredibly sad as he stared at his son. Aaryn's stomach clenched. "You are needed, Gar.. You are very much needed."