Chapter 299 - BLAME ME

"What's wrong? Are you in pain?" Arthur observed her expression. He couldn't help but worry.

Veronica slightly shook her head. "Nothing. It's just… human emotions are too complicated."

'Where did that thought come from?' Arthur wondered confusedly. "Is there something that's bothering you?"

Veronica paused before sharing some parts of her thought, "Everything. Whatever I see or feel, they all bother me. I'm not even sure why I'm feeling or thinking like this. Maybe I have too much free time. I hardly thought of anything when I was out there, trying to survive."

Arthur paid attention to her words. "Are you thinking about our relationship?"

"Among other things, yes." Veronica didn't want to lie about it. She felt that the more she hid from him, the further they parted from each other.

"Since it's about our relationship, don't give too many thoughts. If you think too deeply, you will end up in the bottomless sea and lose yourself. So, don't use your head to think. Try using your eyes to observe my actions from now on and analyze them with your head. Just one month.

"If you think there is a small part of me that you don't like and want to change, tell me. I'll definitely change for you. However, if you think I'm not worthy of you then… just do whatever you want. I won't stop you. Please just don't give me false hope. I can't bear it."

His hands firmly grasped hers. His throat tightened inside when he talked but he pretended not to notice.

"…" Veronica became quiet. She didn't want to be mean to him. Nor did she want to hurt him. She wanted to be truthful. 

'Look Ver, you tried to do the right thing and ended up hurting him right after waking up. He didn't do anything wrong, but you kept punishing him because of your selfishness. You are the worst.'

She left his embrace and got up. Wrapping the comforter around her chest, she told him, "It's not your fault, Arthur. It's just me being selfish. I was just thinking too deeply about myself and got hurt in return. In the process, I made you suffer as well."

Arthur couldn't sleep anymore. He sat beside her. Once again, he gently held her hand. "I didn't suffer as much as you did."

Veronica couldn't take this anymore. She shouted, "Why are you supporting me? Why don't you blame me? If you did, it would hurt me less. I would feel less guilty. You are the victim, but you make it sound like I'm the victim. Don't do this! Complain to me if you were hurt. Blame me for my stupidity. Tell me where I'm wrong so that I can fix it. I'm willing to learn!"

Arthur cupped her face. "It's okay. Calm down first. Take a deep breath. Let me tell you why I said nothing. Nica, the moment I saw you, I was drawn to your naiveness and innocence. I haven't met a woman like you before. It was new to me and I rather liked your company. That's how I came to like you.

"You see, I didn't have any expectation of what kind of woman I wanted to be with in my life. I never even daydreamed that one day I would marry someone and think of having a family with her. After meeting you, I started thinking about dating you, marrying, and then having a family with you.

"From the very beginning, I liked you just the way you are. I want you to be happy by my side. There is nothing I want more from you. That's why I didn't think you needed to be changed. I knew you had shortcomings despite your dream so big. That's why I was willing to play the part of your protective charm for the rest of my life.

"I didn't want to burden you with my thoughts. That's why I never told you. The mistake you made was a common mistake if I think from your point of view. Two days you were sleeping and then you woke up and told me what made you leave me. In the office, I tried to think about what I would do if I were in your place. With all the people said to you and then what they showed you, it was normal for you to believe that was real. That's when I ordered Felix to bring the guy.

"When I saw that guy look exactly like me, there was no way I could blame you after that. Even I would have misunderstood you no matter how much I trusted you. Later, you suffered alone. You experienced a cruel world without anyone's help. You have no friends near you to teach you anything.

"At that time, I was surrounded by friends and disciples. They tried to give me mental strength. They helped me to search for you. They did everything to please me. But you were all alone, Nica. It was my duty to protect you. I swore that I would never let the wind scratch on you. But you came to me with scars on your body.

"Every time I see these scars, I feel regret and guilt. I did want to help you to show the world, I didn't want you to learn about it so fast. That's why whenever you blamed me and scolded me, I felt like I was redeeming myself. This is how I should be punished. That's the reason why I took all the blame on myself without protesting. If I was good enough you wouldn't suffer like this."

Arthur's words were full of affection. His words held no lies or disguise. He openly shared his thoughts with her. To him, he was worthless who wasn't able to keep the woman he loved from harm. That's why he didn't mind when she reprimanded him.

For Veronica, it hurt more when he was acting more lovable. She could feel less guilty if he acted all bossy in front of her. But, he didn't. Rather, he apologized. He didn't want her to change. He wanted to change for her sake.

What he wanted was her happiness without her changing her personality. He didn't think it was necessary for her to do that when he would keep her safe all the time.

How wrong he was!

However, it was too late. The misunderstanding came to an end, but their hearts grew apart. Both felt guilty. Both felt responsible. Both wanted redemption.

Veronica lowered her gaze. She couldn't stare at the innocent eyes filled with love anymore. It was too much for her heart.

Arthur noticed small pearl-like tears trickling down her face. His heart ached when he saw her tears. He didn't mean to give her agony. That's why he stayed quiet up until now.

Nonetheless, that's not what Veronica wanted. She wanted equality. She was done standing behind him and being protected by him. She wished to stand beside him even if it hurt.

Thus, he opened his mouth. He shared his innermost thoughts. And, she was hurt even more.

Arthur leaned forward and kissed her forehead. It was a soft touch. His lips barely grazed her skin. It was only to soothe her pain.

But, he didn't know that it twisted her heart uncomfortably. Her heart ached so much that she had a hard time breathing. She was unable to control her tears. The gentler he acted, the worse she felt.

After that, Veronica cried a lot. If tears could create a pond, her tears would create a lake. She cried until her eyes were puffy. And, Arthur was beside her the whole time, trying to soothe her pain.

When she was done crying, she sniffed. Her breathing became irregular. Her eyes, nose, and ears turned red in the process.

Using his magic, Arthur poured a glass of water and brought the glass close to her mouth. "Drink water. You will feel better."

Veronica drank the last drop of water from the glass. Arthur wiped her mouth and eyes and then said, "Do you want to rest more? You must be tired."

Veronica shook her head. "I want to cool my eyes. My eyes look ugly, don't they?"

"Not at all. They look prettier when you cry," Arthur replied with a smile.

"Don't joke." Embarrassed, Veronica pinched his thick waist.

Arthur turned the glass of water into ice and placed it on her eyes as she lay down. His free hand stroked her head as though he was coaxing a child to sleep.

Veronica was tired after crying so much. She was drowsy from his actions. It didn't take much effort to make her fall asleep.

When Arthur realized that she fell asleep, he let the magic control the ice and got up from the bed. The ice stayed above her eyes. No matter how much she moved, the ice didn't fall. It was as if it was glued to her eyes. The amazing part of the magic was, it didn't melt.

After freshening up, Arthur went downstairs. He met Ovior in his office.

"You are here.. I have something for you."