Nineteenth Encounter

“Why’s the boss dickless?” (man 1) A new group of three men had entered, today.

“There’s a man there, he’s probably got a dick.” (man 2)

“I’m not really keen on fucking total strangers.” (Sam)

“Did you know that other group you let fuck you then?” (me)

“Yeah, I did. David’s an old friend of mine I should’ve listened to when he warned me about Vick. At the time I accused him of being jealous. I was such a fool.” (Sam)

“What are you doing here anyway? I didn’t think adventurers could enter a boss room that had others in it.” (man 3)

“Well, I’m sorta retired? I’m living here now, with Lily.” (Sam) He demonstrated his meaning with a kiss that I happily enjoyed and returned.

“I’m not really interested in watching you two make out, and we want to continue further. So, unless you got a better idea, we need to defeat the boss.” (man 1)

“I wouldn’t mind fucking that boy.” (man 2)

“Why are you calling me a boy? I’m not that young!” (Sam)

“You don’t look much older than my son in law, and you sure as heck don’t look like a veteran adventurer.” (man 3)

“I was just being insulting. He’s a boss’s boy toy.” (man 2)

“Hey, don’t insult him! He’s a man in all the ways I care about! Which is more than I can say about you!” (me)

“Yeah? How about I prove how much a man I am by cutting you in half!” (man 2)

A greatsword wielder huh? Thinks his manhood is in his sword?

“All that would prove is how easy you are to taunt.” (me)

“Let’s just fuck this bitch up already, there’s no need to be kind to a monster.” (man 1)

“What if the boy tries to stop us?” (man 3)

“Then he dies too. Siding with monsters is betrayal of humanity.” (man 1)

“Bastards. Fine.” (me)

While I didn’t want to kill them, I also didn’t want them to escape unscathed, and thankfully, my experience fighting five at once had helped me improve a lot.

“What the hell? This bitch is damaging my sword!” (man 2)

“I told you sword and board is better!” (man 1)

Their coordination is crap.

“Damnit! Why can’t I find an opening?” (man 2)

“Don’t blame me for your incompetence!” (man 1)

I mean, when I’d fought David’s group the first time I met them, the shield user kept interfering with me when I tried to attack anyone else. This guy is really just defending himself, and ignoring attacks I send at his allies. I guess he thinks he’s good because he’s having an easier time defending against my attacks, and doesn’t get any fewer hits in than the greatsword wielder. Except, he should be exploiting his shield to disrupt me, and force me to pay more attention to him to avoid getting pushed around.

Thanks to learning better offensive techniques, despite not being able to land any solid blows, I was slowly destroying their gear.

“I never heard about a boss this dangerous in here!” (man 2)

“Oh quit your whining! It’s not that bad!” (man 1)

Eventually I got in a few solid hits in the right locations. Remembering what I knew about knocking people out from my past life, I got in a solid shot to the jaw. My first attempt only dazed them, but that was enough to get in more good hits, and before long the two front line fighters were down.

“I hope the brain damage isn’t too bad.” (me)

“Why’d you go easy on them?” (Sam)

“Well, even if they kill me, I’ll revive. That doesn’t apply to them. Seems unfair to put them in danger of dying when I’m not in real danger of that.” (me)

“They threatened to kill me if I interfered!” (Sam)

“Yeah, that’s not cool. Don’t interfere in fights, Sam. I don’t want to risk finding out if the blessing will save you or not.” (me)

“I think they deserve worse than this.” (Sam)

“Maybe they do. I’d rather not be the one to do it.” (me)

“You killed, Vick.” (Sam)

“He wanted to enslave you. I do not tolerate slavers. I couldn’t be sure you’d be okay if I died either.” (me)

“Um, thank you for sparing them.” (man 3)

“You aren’t going to fight?” (me)

“Well, I’d have preferred to avoid fighting entirely. The church of light doesn’t condemn all monsters as evil… even if it is heavily implied. Maybe I’m just not a big believer in it, despite getting the blessing of light. May we leave? I’d like to heal them somewhere I don’t have to worry about them starting a new fight as soon as they wake up.” (man 3)

“Sure… and, thanks for being open minded.” (me)

“I’ve often believed there must be a reason for the existence of monsters. I sometimes wonder if people higher up in the church know more. I hope we can talk someday. Goodbye, Lily.” (man 3)