Chapter 83 - Just As Arin Helev

Not able to say her last goodbye.

This tormented Iria Alewine. If she could at least see her friend's body for one last time by risking her life, she was willing to do it countless times but... this was about time. It was beyond her ability or control.

She never hated to be away from her homeland as much as she did now! 

"This is what Her Highness wanted, Commander," Rion uttered. "If you didn't carry out the task just for her, she won't be able to forgive herself. You know how much she loved the kingdom and the people."

When Iria heard Rion's words, she glanced up at the sky again. "Right now... I'm tired of everything. I want everything to end."

Rion had never once imagined that his Commander would say such things! This was the complete opposite of the Masked Commander from his memory! As such, his mind went blank and he couldn't utter a single word.

"You should go and rest. I will have the soup once they brought in," Iria said in a low voice. Ever since Rion entered, she hasn't spared him a single glance.

"Commander, you need to keep yourself warm to recover. Please don't leave your bed too long," Rion informed her with concern and bowed. "Please have some rest." Then he walked out of the chamber despite the uneasy feeling which he felt.

After standing still near the window for a while, Iria returned to her bed. Covering herself with the blanket, she thought of the few people who would be aware of her friend's death and mourn for her, especially the King and... Crown Prince Zaro.

She only had two friends in her life. One passed away and now... she can't even be there for the other one. Will Zaro be fine? She doubted that.

Unlike Prince Orius who was always cold towards everyone including his family, Crown Prince Zaro was a family man. Being the eldest, he genuinely cared for his two younger siblings. Now with his only sister gone, he will surely be having a hard time.

The more Iria used her brain, the more her head hurt. Her fever hasn't subdued yet and due to the excruciating pain, she even felt like her head was about to explode! However, it didn't stop the Commander from thinking of her homeland.

Things would surely be a mess there and for someone like her, not being there right now was a nightmare.

*

After failing to sleep the whole night, Arin Helev noticed that the sun had already started to rise. He decided to go and check on Iria as his concern was killing him. He holds back himself throughout the night not to be a burden to her and he truly hoped that she would be feeling a bit better by now.

He walked out of his chamber and when he entered Iria's room which was opposite to his but separated by a small ground, he realized that she was already up.

Didn't she sleep last night?  Just the thought of it made him worried. She truly needs to rest to get better.

"How are you feeling now?" he asked as he pulled a chair and sat beside her bed.

Iria Alewine was sitting on the bed with her back pressed against the backrest. Her lower body was still covered by a blanket. When she looked at Arin's face, she knew that he didn't sleep well last night. Maybe she was making it hard for him again.

What happened yesterday in the Blue Mountains crossed her mind again. His concern for her which was written all over his face, his desperate voice and... his warm embrace; those were luxuries for her who only entered his life to fool him.

"I'm fine now," she replied in a low voice. She shouldn't give him more trouble anymore.

Her voice and her face; though she still hasn't recovered, she seemed to be a bit better than last night and Arin felt relief. He reached out his hand and placed his palm on her forehead. Then a subtle smile was formed on his lips. "Your fever is gone. That means you will be fine soon."

All the time, Iria blankly stared at him. Must he always care about her this much? She was always cruel to him, especially in the past few days. Wasn't he disappointed at all?!

"Yesterday. Did I trouble you so much? You even braved the rain and climbed up the mountains." The words unconsciously escaped her lips. Was it because he appeared so tired that it made her feel bad? She wasn't sure.

Maybe because her feelings for him always made her lost control. 

The Crown Prince instantly shook his head. "Don't worry about that." He smiled when he continued, "I would surely be angry if you were sneaking out alone just for fun but... I understand. If I were you, I might even be worse."

His warmness and kindness only made Iria felt ashamed of herself. If he knew that the one who died was the real Princess Iria, will he still be treating her this way?

His wrath was the last thing she wanted to experience! 

"If I commit a sin against you, will you still treat me like this?" When these words unconsciously escaped her lips again, she regretted it but... it was too late. He heard everything.

The Crown Prince was taken aback by her sudden and strange question. He was too surprised to the point where he ended up staring at her with a confused face. Why did she ask him such a question?

"Never mind," Iria quickly muttered and attempted to turn away but...

"I'm not sure," Arin spoke up and it made her glanced at him. "I don't know what the crime is but... I think my feelings will still be the same. You know, Iria. People like the two of us are bounded by many duties. 

"Sometimes, we can't behave the way we want to and at other times, we must act against our wishes. I'm the Crown Prince of this kingdom and that's why I can't be sure. I never belonged to myself but my kingdom."

When Iria listened to his response, she already imagined the day when he would stare at her with hatred. The pain of a betrayal.

However, what he said next were beyond her imagination.

"But I'm sure of one thing," Arin added and glanced at her with a little smile. "Even if you commit the worst crime against me, even if I'm bounded by my Crown Prince title and responsibilities; I will still care about you, just as Arin Helev."