Book 4: Chapter 76

“Am I included?” Henry VIII asked the guide that was translating for him. The guide cleared his throat and raised his hand, asking Tafel for him.

“Yes,” Tafel said. “You’re one of my subjects now. Do you own all of the island that England’s on? If not, I want you to conquer it all.”

Henry’s expression blanked. He whispered to the guide, “When did I become one of her subjects?”

The guide scratched his head. “Do you know the famous saying, I came; I saw; I conquered?” He nodded. “The instant Her Majesty stepped on your land and laid her eyes on you, you became one of her subjects. If you haven’t noticed, she’s a tyrant.” He cleared his throat. “Of course, I’m not actually sure that’s the case. You see, I’m just a guide that was hired to bring her to England.”

One of the nobles raised their hands. “What if we can’t double the size of our territory? Isn’t it unfair that some of our territories are larger than others? Also, the majority of the people I can draft have been taken away by Your Majesty’s peasant rebellion.”

Tafel snorted. “If you can’t double your territory, I’ll demote you.” She placed her hands on her hips. “As for fairness, since when did any of you care about fairness? Ask the peasants if they thought you’ve been fair.” She swept her gaze over the nobles, glaring at them. “As for the third part, didn’t I tell you I can transport an army around? Pool all your people together and request for me to send them to you when it’s time. With me as the leader, you have to stop thinking traditionally. Think with magical portals!”

Frederick III raised his hand. “If we convince someone to join us like Your Majesty has suggested, does that count as territory we’ve added to our quota?”

Tafel nodded.

“So,” Frederick III said and stroked his chin. “Your Majesty is suggesting we talk to them first, and if they refuse, summon a great army inside of their home whilst they’re unprepared?”

Tafel pointed at Frederick. “Do you hear that, everyone? That’s called thinking with magical portals.”

***

Alice sighed and snuggled deeper against Nate’s chest. After making a name for herself, she was finally located! Not by Tafel, but by her dear Nate. Unlike Tafel, Nate was reliable and usually meant what he said as long as he wasn’t joking. “I’m not going to lie,” she mumbled. “I was pretty lonely without you.”

“But I’ve only been gone for a few minutes?”

Alice froze, a chill running down her spine. That voice didn’t belong to Nate at all! She sat up, and her face struck a fluffy mess. “Ow!”

“My nose!” Burc yowled. “Why did you sit up like that!?”

“What do you mean why did I sit up like that?” Alice asked and rubbed her forehead. “Why were you there?” She looked around. Nate wasn’t there. A sigh escaped from her lips when she realized it was just a dream.

“Well,” Burc said, his voice muffled because he was covering his nose with his paws. “I heard you say you missed me, so I hopped up there to make sure you weren’t possessed.”

Alice squinted at Burc. “What do you mean possessed? Even if I happened to be possessed, what could you have done?”

“I could’ve slapped you,” Burc said. “Do you know why so many places revere and respect cats? It’s because we can hunt ghosts.”

“Ghosts exist in this world?” Alice asked and raised an eyebrow. “How come I haven’t seen any?”

Burc rolled his eyes and lowered his paws. He gently rubbed his nose, making sure it wasn’t bruised enough to be hurt by the elements. “You haven’t seen any ghosts because us cats have hunted them all.”

Alice snorted. “That doesn’t make any sense. How can cats hunt all the ghosts when people are always dying?”

“Well, cats are everywhere,” Burc said and sniffed. He patted his nose again and winced this time before glaring at Alice.

“Cats might be everywhere, but what are the chances I wouldn’t hear the commotion of a cat hunting a ghost?”

Burc leaned his upper body towards Alice. He raised a paw. Alice narrowed her eyes at him and asked, “What are you—”

Pow!

Alice yelped and clutched her nose. “What the heck!?”

“There was a ghost on your nose,” Burc said and sat back on his hindlegs. He sniffed and raised his head, pointing his chin at the ceiling of the carriage. “You’re welcome.”

A small but firm hand wrapped itself around Burc’s tail. “I’m going to toss you out of here,” Alice said and pushed open the window.

“Wait!” Burc clutched onto Alice’s clothes, his lower body suspended in the air by Alice’s hand. “I overheard Suleiman saying something! If you throw me outside, I won’t tell you and you’ll deeply regret it! Besides, you hurt my nose first!” His voice lowered into a mumble. “And there really was a ghost.”

Alice narrowed her eyes at Burc before glancing outside the window. With a grumble, she placed Burc down onto the bed. “Alright,” she said. “What did you overhear?”

“Something’s weird happening in the Kingdom of Hungary,” Burc said, taking a few steps back, just out of reach of Alice’s hands. “They border the Holy Roman Empire, and the Holy Roman Empire is antagonistic towards Suleiman. Naturally, they’ll help out the Kingdom of Hungary because it provides a buffer between the two empires, you see?”

Alice nodded. “That makes sense, but why does a cat know so much about kingdoms and politics?”

Burc rolled his eyes. “I’m just repeating what I heard,” he said. “Anyway, can I continue? Or are you going to continue questioning my greatness?”

“Go on.”

“So, the Holy Roman Empire did the unthinkable!” Burc waited, letting the suspense build. “They attacked the Kingdom of Hungary and took the capital in one day!” Seeing that there was no hunt of surprise on Alice’s face, Burc sniffed and licked his paw. “And here I thought you were the only freak capable of winning sieges in one day, but judging by your reaction, it isn’t that impressive.”

Alice furrowed her brows. The only freak? Could one of her companions be working for the Holy Roman Empire? Alice smirked. Well, she’d find out soon enough. Things were getting a little boring anyway.