Chapter 242 - Guilty For What?

"Are you still crying?" Emily could hardly stop herself from asking as she pulled her face out from under the duvet that Shadow had wrapped around her.

"I told you to sleep," Shadow responded in a calm tone but she could hear the heaviness in his voice that was due to him crying for nearly half an hour. Yeah! Imagine someone like him crying all of a sudden.

When she decided to show him all of her memories from her time spent in the dungeons of Fifth Master, the last thing she expected was for him to start crying all of a sudden as he pulled her in a tight hug.

She wasn't sure why she did that, showing him all the dark, cold, painful, and humiliating memories of her past. But for some reason, she just felt like if there's anyone whom she could trust with her past, then it's him. 

Not like she didn't trust her brothers or Kaiden, but she never want them to see those darkest moments of her life. They were the last people whom she would want to see her in that broken, scared, and hopeless state.

Besides, one of the reasons why her heart and soul trusted Shadow with her past was because, during her stay at the academy, he had already seen her at her worst. There were moments when she was dead tired, scared, hopeless, crying all night, and many more. He never judged her back then and was always there to support her and pull her back on her feet.

And just like she predicted and trusted, he didn't judge her, nor did he pity her when she finally showed him her memories. There was no remorse or disappointment in his eyes. Instead, it seemed like he was also suffering because of her memories. And worst of all, it seemed like he was blaming himself for what happened to her. And that was the only thing that made her feel bad about making a hectic decision of showing him everything without telling him beforehand.

Unfortunately, the man didn't give her the chance to tell him that he had nothing to do with her past. He just directly ordered her not to speak at all as he kept on shedding tears, and when he was finally done, he told her to sleep. But how could she sleep when he was crying like a baby?

"But Shadow..." Emily tried to speak as she started turning around to face the man, but got stopped by him as he once again covered her face with the duvet, making her groan out loud.

"Sleep..." He whispered and started patting her head softly as if she was a little kid.

Emily became still and stayed silent for a couple of seconds as she contemplated about following his advice and actually sleeping, considering that it was pretty late and she was feeling tired after the roller coaster ride of emotions that she had gone through the day, but soon got rid of the thought as her mind, body, and soul weren't ready yet to take a break.

"You just don't want me to see your crying face." She murmured under her breath, knowing fully well that his enhanced hearing sense would catch every single word leaving her mouth.

There was a silence for the next couple of seconds as Shadow's hand, which had been patting her head softly, stopped in its tracks before she felt him removing the duvet from her face so that he could look at her.

"It's already half-past three o'clock in the morning. You should sleep, Princess." He spoke in a tender voice as he once again started patting her head softly. His fingers lightly grazed her hair and scalp, making it hard for Emily to keep her eyes open as she suddenly started feeling the pull of sleep.

However, just as she was about to give in, she realized exactly what was happening and her half-closed eyes flew open, breaking the spell. "Don't use your powers." She told the man who seemed a little surprised seeing that she broke his spell, but then a small but genuine smile bloomed on his lips as he spoke, "Your powers are growing stronger. That's good." 

Emily stared at the man who was too experienced in shifting topics according to his comfort. But according to her, he should face discomforts sometimes as long as it meant she would get her answers from him. 

"Why did you cry?" She asked him, bringing them back to the main topic. She won't be taking a break unless she found out why he looked so torn and was blaming himself for something that was out of his control.

Shadow remained silent for a few long seconds before he finally let out a small sigh as he answered, "I just feel like it." 

"Really? Try again. Maybe you will find a better excuse this time." Emily was quick to point out his lame excuse that she wasn't following at all. 

Shadow once again remained silent for some time before he spoke, "Then... Why did you suddenly decide to show me all those memories when I only asked to see the girl?" 

This time around, it was Emily's turn to stay silent but after thinking for a couple of seconds, she decided to speak the truth. "I just felt like it." She knew exactly how lame her words sounded as soon as they were out of her mouth. She just gave the same answer as him. "I'm telling the truth though." She added next in her defense.

There was a little smile playing on Shadow's lips as he nodded his head in response. "I'm just feeling guilty for being late." He suddenly confessed. The spark in his eyes dimmed again and once again there was guilt flickering through them.

Emily hurriedly sat up so that she could face the man. She moved her hands to cup his face so that she could make him look at her as she asked, "Guilty for what, Shadow?"