Chapter 38

After dinner, Senia showed up at the ward for treatment, but tonight there were not many patients due to the large number of medicines distributed by the Lord. People that came to the ward were the ones that have seriously or critically injured this to say reduce Senia’s burden. It was of Faber’s request and because of that, Senia was able to return home after only using a small amount of her divinity.

‘That is a good thing. She must have a hard time too.’

The new situation caused the dawn to pass without intimacy and Carr changed his clothes with these bittersweet thoughts. He knew that Senia was sleeping soundly in her room, however, he couldn’t help but worry that she might be reaching her physical limit. Tomorrow she would have her exam and he was worried about that.

Carr sighed and decided to get into his bed when there was a knock on his door.

“Sir Carr, are you sleeping? ….Oh, you won’t be able to answer if you are asleep, right? No, but you aren’t usually able to answer either…. uh…”

“….?”

Carr got up without answering Senia’s rambling and opened the door. She was standing wearing a thin one-piece nightdress that showed her arms and legs while hugging a paper bag from their shopping earlier. Unable to guess the contents, Carr simply tilted his head as he couldn’t think of any other reason why she would visit his room. Earlier when they returned from the ward, Senia had told him that she didn’t need to refill her divinity. 

“You haven’t sleep yet, then do you mind if I come in?” Senia asked with a calmer tone. She was relieved to see Carr’s face.

Carr, who had no reason to refuse, moved aside – letting her in before he closes the door behind. He looked at her, blinking confusedly trying to convey his question about what was happening. Senia hesitated for a moment before she held out a paper bag she was holding.

“This….”

“?”

“C-Can you accept his? You may not like it.”

Her blue eyes showed a sign of nervousness and Carr wondered what was inside the bag that she made her hesitant. He wondered about the content – from snacks to alcohol, but when his eyes landed inside it was completely different from what he thought. 

‘Huh?’

It was a dark purple scarf. A luxury item that was very soft and warm even if when his fingertips touched it lightly. It was something that suited the wintertime. The design was very modest – no decoration or embroidery, but it looked like something he could wear at any time.

“……?”

Carr looked at Senia’s face confusedly while she had looked away as the redness of her face crept up to her chest.

“This is to return the gift that you gave me before. It’s going to get colder and colder in the coming days, so I’ve picked something you’d normally use.”

Carr’s mind stopped working at the explanation. There was only ever one present that he gave to Senia. A cheap silver ring that he bought at the festival. It was something that he bought because he was forced to it and he handed it to her carelessly, so he never expected anything in return from her.

Besides, he had never received anything from anyone since he was born. It made the reality in front of him – where he received a gift, felt like it was someone else’s dream.

Senia opened her eyes wide, trying hard to read Carr’s expression. Seeing that there was no response or even anything reflected in his blank eyes, Senia couldn’t help but doubt herself and felt like she was dismissed.

“Would it be better to ask….?”

Carr raised his hand, covered his mouth, and averted his eyes. His face slowly turning red. Of course, there was no way that he didn’t like the gift. However, he didn’t know how to respond because this was the first time, he ever received something. His heart was pounding, and his face was heating up as he was embarrassed at the unfamiliar feeling.

‘I…I like to thank you for the gift.’

He thought about how to soothe Senia, who seemed to be disappointed and eventually wrap the scarf around his neck. He thought it would be a comfort to Senia to see that he wore it. 

There was an awkward feeling because he wrapped the scarf on top of his pyjama, but the dark purple suited him. The sight of it greatly resembled what Senia had imagined when she picked the scarf. Carr felt awkward about the comfort and soft texture, but he turned to smiled faintly at Senia, who was belatedly delighted.

“I’m glad it suits you. I wanted to give it to you in return for the gift, but I didn’t think I’d be able to meet the deadline.”

‘This is too much.’

“It’s my first time giving something to someone else…. I was very worried.”

Carr swallowed a ‘thank you’ again and folded the scarf to keep it safe while Senia fumbled slightly, trying to continue her words.

“Well, if you weren’t going to sleep right away, could I stay here for a while? I’d like to talk to you about small things.”

With Carr’s permission, Senia smiled bashfully and sat on the chair. There was only one chair in the room, so Carr settled down on the bed – facing Senia.

There was no tea or snacks prepared, but Senia chatted peacefully. She talked about the delicious dinner they had earlier, and Carr nodded, responding to her words. Then she mentioned the sunset or how it was a relief that the medicine was finally distributed. Not once did Carr stop listening to Senia or make any annoying expressions but then her story slowly came to an end and she naturally asked a question.

“I heard that Sir Carr is a lone demon…. Did you not have a family from the beginning?”

Carr nodded calmly. He had never seen the face of his mother or father in all his entire life. At his answer, Senia looked sad but it was not a big deal for Carr.

The old saying how you would only be able to cherish things after you have lost them was never in Carr’s dictionary. He was someone who had never had anything in the first place.

“Don’t you want a family?”

Carr thought about the question for a moment, but he shook his head this time. Sometimes, he did feel envious, but he never thought it was something he could have.

Senia on the other hand just laughed bitterly at the answer, “….I want it.”

Her voice was weak as she lamented on her circumstances and regretting her true desire. 

“It was the only time I felt that I was truly loved. I still think that it would have been nice if I had carved the love from my mother a little deeper and longer. However, after I decide to live as saint….” Senia trailed off as she squeezed the locket around her neck. 

Without even hearing the words, Carr seemed to know what had happened. As Arte and Lu said, Senia always endured everything by herself. Unilaterally, embracing others, showing tolerance, and sharing affection but at the same time hiding her anger, sadness, and suffering deep within her fragile body each day. She did that to save everyone as a saint – not as a human being. That was the Senia Carr had seen.

He didn’t know why she chose such a hard and difficult path. However, it was understandable that the hard work made her miss her beloved family.

Senia, who was lost in touch, quickly came back to her senses and blush seeing Carr was watching her without saying anything.

“Ahaha…. that’s a little awkward. I’ve never told you anything like this before. I’ve done it before, but I think I’m being too honest in front of Sir Carr. Please keep it a secret from others.”

Carr nodded his head gently, sensing the playful atmosphere from Senia’s word and tapped the space next to him.

“…..?”

Unless she misinterpreted it, it was a sign to sit next to him. Senia widened her eyes but carefully got up and moved to the bed. She wanted to avoid any sexual activity because she was tired, but if Carr wanted it, she didn’t mind.

Sitting side by side next to each other, Senia was comforted by his warmth. Carr’s hand slowly reached out to her and Senia couldn’t help but tense. His strong hand that always wrapped around her waist or neck was slightly stroking her soft silver hair without touching any of her bare skin.

“Oh….”

It was like the day when she came to the dungeon and Carr comforted her for the first time. Senia thought about what to do and closed her eyes. The smile that graced her face was soft and anyone could see that she was happy.

“I think this is why.”

“?”

“This is why I rely on you.”

“….”

“Then… let me be shameless but grateful,” Senia leaned over and rested her head on Carr’s shoulder. He was warm and strong that gave her comfort. 

Carr, on the other hand, was stunned at her action, manage to hold his hand still in the air. She was adorable and he wanted to hug her. The feeling of their shoulder touching each other, and her scent tickled his nose – making it hard for him to relax. He didn’t expect him to get aroused from the situation.

After agonizing, Carr quietly wrapped his hand around Senia’s shoulder. She had narrow shoulders for someone of her age and he realized that all the burden she had was unsuitable for her. He was having an internal debate about having inappropriate thoughts when Senia murmured.

“I’m sorry about the test. Please don’t get hurt.”

‘If I can.’

Senia quickly fell asleep because she had found Carr to be comfortable more than anything else in the world. It was incomparably warm compared to the hot cocoa and thick blankets during winter, it as if the warmth he exudes not only radiate in her body but straight to her heart.

Her breathing soon slows down as her body is completely drained. No matter how tired he was, Carr continued to stare at her. Her eyelashes were trembling slightly following the rhythmic breathing and her pink lips slightly apart. Although he had been staring at her face all day, he never got tired of this sight. In the end, Carr had to avert his gaze – afraid that his mind would start thinking of something inappropriate.

‘It’s ridiculous to say that they are the same.’

Although she would use her smile as a weapon, Senia was not a liar like Tess. She always sacrificed herself and laughed for others.

Looking at the scarf that was folded neatly on the table, Carr vowed to fight for her ‘come hell or high water’.

***

The next day at noon, everyone that was of importance gathered in a certain place. As it was a test to gain Serendipirel’s permanent residency, there was a lot of tension in the field that never been before. Only Tess, who proudly walked in and sat in one of the stands, reciting how he heard about the issue from Carr.

“My opponent is the saint. She can do anything except killing. They can win if the saint can do miracle works to heal,” Belmont clicked his tongue grumpily.

Compared to yesterday, today’s enemy was over two meters – smaller than yesterday. It was holding a sword with one hand, a silver armour covering all its body and a blond air on top of its head. Rather than calling it a monster, it was a man. 

The knight who had always been by Belmont’s side was sent to the stadium as a test.

Tess, who – like Senia, had already confirmed all the rules used in the test, laughed loudly saying how Belmont had done something interesting.

“Ay, you’ve some tricks under your sleeve? There’s no rule about the organizers using humans as the test. That’s the only way you can deal with a saint.”

The first day when they arrived in Serendipirel, Senia had told many stories about a miracle to Faber. It was only Tess’s luck that he was there to listen, and he had told Belmont about it. There was a hint in the story about the saint’s weakness.

A person who had given God’s divinity to save humanity with the greatest miracle. However, they….

“A priest cannot punish a man who was innocent.”

A clear voice came from his side and Tess turned his head sharply toward the owner. Senia, who interrupted the monologue, sat next to him after patting her skirt. Deep, clear eyes like a lake met Tess and she gently raised her brow. Her beauty was almost mysterious at that moment. It was natural that his heart beats faster even if he didn’t intend to.

“It is not man-made law, but it’s a violation of ethics that God had set. It is a crime that can be punished by divinity itself. In other words, no saint or powerful priest can use their power against innocents.”

“Hahaha. I see, but Senia? Why are you here?”

Senia, who smiled bitterly, turned toward the other iron gate of the stadium. It opened with a scratching sound and fully armed Carr entered the battlefield.

“…..!”

“Because I can’t fight the escort, so I asked Sir Carr to do it.”

“….how?” Tess raised his brow curiously.

The opponent today was not announced so it should be kept secret until the moment they entered the stadium to take the test. However, Senia was sure that the enemy would be human as expected. 

“Because I gave the information to the lord, it was possible to change the enemy to a human being. You’d normally send out more monsters after your Orc had been defeated right? Then while you think about it what if a person came out?”

Tess’s heart skipped a beat while Senia ignored his question and just smiled sweetly.

“Tess, let’s pray so that Sir Carr will not get hurt.”

‘This woman….’