Chapter 92
Lucius the First was the emperor.
Poliana Winter was his knightess.
He was a ruler, and she was his subject.
Although they greatly cared for each other, their relationship could be nothing more. The emperor thought to change it, but before he could, he realized the truth. He almost forgot what made Poliana truly happy, but he remembered just in time.
"Are you happy that I became the emperor of this continent, Sir Pol?"
"Yes! I am very happy and excited!"
The emperor looked deeply into her eyes. Thinking this was the right time to talk about something emotional, Poliana said to him slowly, "Your highness… You told me once that I should hold onto my tears until you reached the end of this continent."
"I did."
"And since then, I have never shed a single tear."
"I see, but I saw the other knights crying like babies at the cliff."
It was the day Lucius the First realized he was in love with Poliana. He knew he would forever remember that evening. Poliana was smiling at him proudly as the sun sets. He could still smell the ocean and hear the waves against the rocks. The cool southern wind that blew against his hair… The birds that sang as they flew across the sea…
"I didn't cry, I didn't want to. In fact, I was happy. We both know that this isn't the end. I knew with absolute certainty that I will continue to be your knight and you will come up with a new dream for all of us to dream about. Thinking of these things, I couldn't help but smile. There were no tears to be shed."
As the woman he loved showed him the greatest platonic love and admiration, the emperor knew he had no chance with her. It was over. It was going to be a one-sided love on his end.
He was the emperor of this continent, which meant he had the greatest responsibility in this world. Of them, one of his duties was to never disappoint his loyal knights. It was his job to make this great knight happy.
"Sir Pol, are you happy."
"I am, your highness. I am happy."
"Because you were given this castle?"
"Hahaha! Maybe that has something to do with it."
"Of course. You have done so much for me, so I should reward you accordingly. I should give you more castles, horses, a new sword, and a great armor. One city isn't enough, so I should give you more land too. And you like to drink, so a winery would be nice."
Lucius the First accepted his fate. They could never be, and he was now ok with it. Poliana replied quietly, "I have more than enough, your highness. You don't need to give me any more things."
The emperor's eyes blurred for a second, but he recovered quickly. He was no ordinary man. He was born a prince and became the emperor all on his own.
And because he was not just a man, he could not live a normal life of a man.
Sir Ainno asked what the point of becoming an emperor if he couldn't even marry the woman he loves. Sir Ainno was right, but for Lucius the First, watching the woman he loves smile was enough.
He did truly love Poliana and he knew Poliana loved him, although in a very different way.
***
He tried to ignore his feelings, then admitted it and was about to confess his love to her but ended up giving up on that same day. It was painful, but the disappointment and sadness only made him look more mature. Lucius the First glared at himself in the mirror. The person looking back at him was a man who now had a deeper and more melancholic beauty. He had been secretly unhappy about his youthful look and now, he was satisfied.
'Love makes a man grow.'
He was a devastatingly handsome man to begin with and now, this emotional scar made him more gorgeous. He had been bathing in the bathhouse for the past few days. His skin was soft and smooth while his hair looked even silkier. Sir Ainno visited his emperor in the morning and asked, "Your highness. You and Sir Poliana… I heard you spent some time in the bathhouse together last night…"
"Oh, that? Nothing happened."
"But I heard something did happen! Everyone knows how she threw up right in front of you and you had to clean up after her. All the guards in her division are feeling so embarrassed. They are so ashamed of her behavior."
A man and a woman spent an evening naked in a bath, yet there was not a single sexual or romantic rumor about it.
Sir Ainno, the only one who knew how Lucius the First truly felt about Poliana, asked if anything else happened. The emperor shook his head and told his friend that he has decided to forget about it for Poliana's sake. Sir Ainno looked at him with relief as he replied, "With whatever the decision you make, your highness, I will always be there for you. I will stand by your side. You have my full support."
Sir Ainno's words were kind and loyal, but it was clear that he was doubting his emperor's words. With a frown, Lucius the First added, "I am really doing it. I am doing it for Sir Pol's happiness. I am willing to make that sacrifice."
"Just make sure you remember your words. I wouldn't surprised if you did something crazy if she does somehow find a man of her own."
"How dare you, Inno! Who do you think I am?! I would never!"
Knock, knock.
The servant knocked on the door, ready to serve the emperor his breakfast. Sir Ainno and Lucius the First both put on serious faces.
The breakfast this morning had a surprising portion of blueberries. At first, the emperor thought that perhaps Sitrin was famous for its blueberries, but the servant answered, "No, it is not, your highness. We brought you the blueberries because Sir Poliana told us she was worried about your eyesight."
"But my eyes are perfectly fine."
"Well… Sir Pol said that you kept praising her looks, so she was worried you might be becoming either nearsighted or farsighted. She seemed very concerned."
Sir Ainno covered his mouth, trying not to burst into laughter. Resigned, the emperor looked down at the table. All he did was compliment the woman he loved, but all she gained from it was a worry that he might be losing his sight.
"…"