Chapter 212 – Worries

The soft hum of the air condition rippled through Yuna’s dorm bedroom as it gently blew fresh, cool air about. It was only a warm night, but the humid air made things just uncomfortable enough. Yuna laid in her bed in thin t-shirt and pajama shorts, the sheets of the bed thrown to the side as one of her legs dangled.

It was late. The last time Yuna checked the time, it was almost midnight. That was quite a bit ago. She shut her eyes, trying to force herself to sleep, but it eluded her despite her best efforts. A sigh escaped her as she reopened her eyes.

‘What do I do?’ she asked herself.

That was the question that was keeping sleep away. It was a question that intruded on her thoughts any time it could in any way it could. She rolled over, burying her face into her pillow. 

‘What do I do with love?’

It was a hard question, made even more difficult due to one little thing. Yuna only understood the word love in theory. And even what she understood meant nothing to her. People often described love as magical and wonderful. Yuna only could feel confusion and need.

‘Need. What is it that I even need?’ she grumbled. ‘It might not even be need. It could just be want.’

But what was it that she wanted? She stared at the headboard of her bed, her chin on her pillow as she thought the question over. As her mind wandered about, trying to locate the answer to her question, it traveled back to the night before. The night in the forest where it was just her and Zero.

She saw Zero leaning towards her again, her heart pounding and her breath quickening. Zero’s pink, glistening lips filled her vision along with her mesmerizing eyes. What if Yuna had just gone forward just a tiny bit? What would have happened?

Then she blinked, shoving the vision aside. It would only add to her confusions. But she couldn’t shake the odd clenching she had in her stomach or slow the pounding in her chest. 

Shifting her thoughts away as best as she could, Yuna sat up and drew her left leg to her. She examined her calf at the spot where the energy shot from that robot guard had struck her. Besides a slight discoloration in the skin, it looked as if nothing had ever happened. 

‘The color should go back to normal in a few days,’ she thought. ‘No scarring. Just like she said.’

She lightly traced a ring around the lighter colored mark on her calf, the sensation slightly tickling her. Then she slid her finger up her leg. Her mind flashed back to the forest and Zero. Closing her eyes, she felt Zero’s hand again against her thigh. She traced its movements as it slowly went up, closer and closer, the shivers growing stronger and stronger. 

But this time, the hand didn’t stop. It continued on its course, slowly, softly stroking her skin inch by inch. The further it got, the quicker Yuna’s breath got as she waited. And wanted. Then the final inches were closed and with that something else opened— 

‘Stop, stop,’ Yuna yelled in her head, the vision disappearing into the air. Her chest pounded and her body almost felt like it was complaining to her, but she held it in. ‘I need to stop. I need to sleep.’

But sleep didn’t reply to her calls. She continued to lay there on her bed, trying to focus her mind on a single question and stop if from running away and going places she wasn’t prepared to think about yet. 

‘I can’t keep going like this,’ she sighed. She listened to the hum of the air condition as she searched for a solution to her current state. ‘I need someone to talk to.’

Her first thought went to Zero, but that was the last person she needed to see right now. Yuna didn’t know what she would do if she was alone with Zero again so soon. 

‘Who else?’

The next person that appeared was Yuki. Yuna wasn’t sure why he was her second choice to discuss something as vague as love. He wasn’t very emotional himself, so how could he help with something like this?

And yet, Yuna felt that he would be the right choice. When she was with him, it felt like everything was under control and that she could relax and open up. That was what she wanted. To open up. 

‘They seem to give off kind of the same feeling,’ Yuna thought. ‘Yuki and Zero. Maybe it’s because they’re friends. I’m always so thrown off around them. I wonder how they met.’

Her mind was set. She would go to Yuki tomorrow and ask him to see if he could help sort her out. 

‘He said that I can tell him about anything that’s bothering me,’ she remembered, thinking back to the end of the meeting. ‘It’s at least worth a try.’

With her mind made up, the worry that built up within fizzled out and sleep rushed to take its place, ushering Yuna off within its soft embrace.

BamBamBamBam

Yuki’s fists flew forward in rapid succession towards the padded targets that Akira was holding in her hands. She moved around, bobbing and weaving, while putting the targets in random locations for Yuki to track. Yuki followed her around with laser focus, alternating between kicks, punches, and elbow and knee strikes. 

While closing the gap to unleash an elbow, he noticed Akira was looking off to the side where the entrance of the training room was. He stopped himself inches away from her. 

“Yuna’s here,” Akira said, her eyes flickering back to Yuki. “I think she wants to talk.”

Yuki turned his head towards where Akira was looking just a few seconds ago. Just like she said, Yuna was standing at the edge of the training floor, her hands behind her back. She looked a bit uncomfortable, shifting about on her feet.

“I think so too,” Yuki nodded. Then he raised his voice. “Yuna, what brings you here?”

He walked to her, Akira beside him. 

“Want to join us?” he asked, stopping about a foot away from her. 

“Join?” Yuna tilted her head. “Oh. No, I don’t feel like training today. I’ll have to do training every weekday.”

“Mmm. I see. Then, I ask again. What brings you here?”

“Just want to talk…” Her words trailed off. Yuki caught her eyes flickering towards Akira uneasily. “If that’s fine?”

“It’s almost lunch,” Akira announced lightly. She gave Yuki a meaningful look. “I’ll be going to shower right now. If that’s fine with you two?”

“I’ll go after,” Yuki replied. “Take your time.”

Akira smiled and gave him a small wave before quickly disappearing. Yuki waited until she was out of sight before returning his attention to Yuna.

“So. It’s just the two of us now,” he said. “What was it that you wanted to talk about?”

“Ah. Um.” Yuna scratched her neck as she averted her eyes. “I don’t really know how to start this.”

“Just talk. I don’t judge.”

“Well, um, what do you know about love?” she asked. A rosy color tinted her cheeks.

“Love?” Yuki repeated. He folded his arms, grabbing the elbows. “That’s an odd question.”

Yuna didn’t reply.

‘She’s in love? With who?’

“Yuna, let me start this off by saying that I’m quite cold emotionally,” Yuki said. She looked up and gave him an inquisitive look. “My emotions are quite muted, even nonexistent at times. I’m sure you’ve noticed at least somewhat.”

She nodded.

“Because of that, I don’t have personal experience with things like ‘love’,” he continued. He paused, before shaking his head. Maybe he did have some experience, but now wasn’t a good time to make things more convoluted. “However, because of my own lack of emotions, I’ve spent years just watching others. Others that did experience these types of things.”

Yuna remained quiet.

“When you have nothing to dwell on personally, you come to realise that you have quite a bit of free time. So while I can’t tell you anything about love from a personal standpoint, I can tell you what I know from just watching others and their interactions.”

“That would be fine. Anything would be fine really,” Yuna replied quietly.

“Love seems to be an emotion that can’t be defined definitively,” Yuki said. “It’s mysterious in how it works and works differently depending on the person. If you don’t mind me asking, why do you want to know?”

“Um. I’ve just been feeling a bit unsure lately. Emotionally.” She sighed and looked up at the ceiling. “Confused. I want to know why.”

“Describe it to me. What have you been feeling?” 

“I don’t really know how to describe it,” Yuna admitted. “My head’s just a mess.”

“How do you feel when you’re with the person?” 

“Relaxed. Excited? And, um, I kind of want attention.” She reddened. “I know that sounds so childish.”

“No, no. It’s fine,” Yuki waved. “How about when you aren’t with this person. How do you feel?”

“Distracted,” Yuna replied immediately. “That person invades my thoughts everyday. A weird clawing in my stomach and chest. A bit sad.”

“And you wonder if you’re in love?” Yuki asked.

“A little. I’m pretty sure I am. I just don’t know what to do.”

“Why not just approach this person and gauge whether or not they seem interested in return?” Yuki suggested. “Unless you can’t do that.”

“I can’t do that,” Yuna said, vigorously shaking her head.

“I guessed as much. But honestly, if you don’t step forward, then you’ll be relying on the person to step forward. Sometimes it’s better to just shoot your shot.”

“Oh. I guess. So you think I’m in love?”

“Not to be rude, but it’s fairly obvious,” Yuki shrugged. “It’s not really that normal to be that interested in someone unless it’s love. Wouldn’t you agree?”

“I thought as much,” she sighed. “I don’t know what to do though.”

“Like I said, maybe just shoot your shot. Do you think the person would get angry if you tried?”

“No, never.”

“Then the worst that could happen is you’ll get rejected. It’ll be painful, but it’s better to do it now, than to wait and see your feelings grow. If they grow, then the rejection would just hit so much harder. I’ve seen the toughest of people just become bawling messes for weeks because of rejection. That’s a bit extreme, but you get the idea.”

“I see,” Yuna said slowly. “Thank you for the advice.”

“No problem,” he replied. Then a question appeared in his mind. “If you don’t mind me asking, can you tell me who this person is? I don’t need names. Maybe just a simple description?”

“Oh. Well, she’s super kind and mature,” Yuna said, her eyes brightening. “Really beautiful as well. But she doesn’t seem to let her beauty get to her head. She’s playful at times too.”

“Wait. It’s a girl?” Yuki interrupted. His mind raced as he realised what that meant. 

“Yes.”

‘That’s a problem. Do I tell her? I have to tell her.’

With the advice Yuki gave, Yuna might go and just blurt out her feelings to this girl. And if the girl didn’t reciprocate, then that might cause a whole new can of worms to be opened. 

“Yuna. Do you know what the mood around couples of the same gender is around here?” he asked.

“What do you mean?” Yuna replied.

“I see. Then this is something you might want to look up. Girl and girl relationships,” he said. “Actually, please look into this. It’s important.”

“Okay,” she nodded though she looked confused.

“I just want you to know what you’re getting into.”

“I see. Thank you.”

“Is there anything else?”

“No. I’ll go now,” Yuna said with a small smile before turning and heading back to the elevator. 

Yuki watched her go, a slight frown on his face. Yuna was so innocent. But the world around her was not. He hoped that she could survive it.

FriendlyDragon