Chapter 138 - Kim Daehyun: A Proposal

"Mr. Kim, what have you done? Mr. Lee will scold me for this," Hoonsik exclaimed in surprise. He immediately grabbed the folder from my hand and peeked at the papers in it that had been torn into pieces with a panicked look.

However, I didn't even care about how he complained to his master later. Chunghee, who was currently standing silently behind my back didn't even comment on anything, so I thought that what I did wasn't a problem at all.

Yoon Hoonsik scratched his head, still looking both panicked and confused. He was heard muttering softly to himself, "What should I tell Mr. Lee later? This is bad ... really bad."

I was about to ask him to leave. But, as soon as the tip of my lips lifted, Chunghee voiced first, "Hoonsik, leave now. Tell him not to give me anything. Also, tell him that Daehyun will take care of everything, so he doesn't need to give me any allowances."

Hearing those words, I couldn't lie to myself that I felt proud; felt like I had really won his heart. However, since I didn't want to show that joy on my face, I cleared my throat softly, then affirmed to Hoonsik, "Did you hear that? Leave now."

Hoonsik looked frustrated. He paused to stare at both of us and the folder in turn before he finally left without a word.

As soon as he disappeared from my sight, Chunghee and I immediately went to the car that had been parked on the side of the road, then immediately head to the airport.

In the car, Chunghee didn't talk much. He just kept leaning his forehead against the car window while staring out, while I also didn't dare to talk to him other than just being silent beside him until we arrived.

On the private jet, Chunghee remained silent. I took his hand and asked worriedly, "Are you all right?"

He turned at me weakly, replied, "My stomach doesn't feel good."

"Are you airsick?" Wiping the sweat on his forehead, I tried to reassure him, "Hang on, okay? We'll be there in thirty minutes."

I watched his face turn pale. Worried, I said, "If you want to throw up, just throw up. Don't hold back."

He shook his head weakly. "No. Since earlier, I do feel unwell, though."

Hearing about this, I was immediately taken aback. "Then, why did you say that you were okay?! I didn't force you to go with me today!"

"I just wanted to finish it," he said.

"What do you want to finish?" I asked in confusion.

"I don't know ... I don't know. I just feel like I have to get something done ...."

As soon as he finished his words, he suddenly burst into tears. He looked to the side, but the reflection of his on the glass showed how his tears flowed down his face.

Surprised, I immediately embraced his body, holding him to calm him down. I asked anxiously, "What's wrong? Do you have a stomachache?"

"I don't ... know ..." Sobbing, he answered in a slightly trembling voice, "I just wanted to get back to Sokcho and sleep."

I actually knew that he cried not because he felt pain in his body but his heart. However, not wanting to bring up anything about his feelings, I could only say words, pretending to believe that he was not feeling well, "Hang on, we'll be going straight to the hospital as soon as we arrive in Busan."

In the silence, he suddenly turned to me, revealing his tear-stained eyes. He asked with a pitiful expression, "Are you really taking me to France with you?"

Frowning, I didn't answer but ask him back, "Why? Do you mind?"

"Don't take me there. I was always thinking about this last night and I thought it was a bad idea. I wouldn't stand it," he replied, sobbing. "I just couldn't think straight yesterday, so I could only agree with it. I'm scared."

Hearing the refusal, I smiled and didn't feel angry at all. On the contrary, I felt so much in love with him.

I stroked his hair gently, then wiped the tears in his eyes which kept flowing as if oozing out the pain that had inhabited his heart for a long time.

When I saw how much he was suffering by the expression he showed, I promised myself and him that I would always be there for him and promised not to make him cry like this.

However, I could only say the words inwardly and didn't dare to voice them out.

I once read in a book that according to psychology, someone who tended to say his goals, then most likely those goals would never be achieved. Actually, I didn't really believe that analogy. But, as I felt that Chunghee would also think that such words were just a ruffian boasting, then keeping them in my heart was the right thing for now.

No need for words. I knew that Chunghee no longer needed the words he had heard so many times, but in the end, it all ended tragically. So, after this, I just needed to prove to him that what I told him wasn't a lie just to get his heart.

If only he knew that I didn't need him just for sex.

I didn't need him to bare beneath me and moan to please me.

I didn't want that.

To put it simply, I just wanted us to be together; watched movies at night; or didn't do anything at all. I wanted to stroke his back; kissed his forehead; after that, said "good night" to each other, then slept while embracing him.

It would be okay, right?

How beautiful was that simplicity when I started to think about it in my head.

If it would really happen, I wouldn't need any more happiness. That's what I had been looking for the most all this time.

Drifting into my reverie, I had so carried away with my own expectations that I didn't hear Chunghee speak until he said, "Daehyun, do you hear me? Please, don't take me there. I'll be with you, but we have to stay here."

I sighed. Smiling, I tried to convince him, "What are you worried about? I'm sure once you are there, you will be amazed at the atmosphere of the country. I live in Paris, if we open the window, we can immediately see the Eiffel tower. I'm sure you will like my house. It's away from the crowds, so you don't have to worry."

"That's not it. I just don't want to leave this country. I want to be here. If I have to die, then I have to die here."

"Chunghee, it's okay. You're just not used to it." I paused my words before I said something important which should be my main reason, "Also, I'll marry you there. We'll get a civil solidarity pact and stay together as a legal couple. So, marry me." Finishing my sentence, I couldn't help but kiss his forehead as a form of my sincerity when I said that.

Actually, I wanted to say this when I proposed there, but because of impatience, I couldn't help but say it now.

Maybe this was far from romantic, but I thought it didn't matter. I was sure that Chunghee wasn't someone who really wanted romance in a relationship, the point was loyalty.

However, as soon as he heard those words, Chunghee's expression turned startled, even his tears that had been pouring out suddenly stopped. In that instant, he looked away, as if he was irritated by my words.

Since I felt that that phrase wasn't something to argue about, I said to him, intending to calm him down, "Um, maybe you need some time to think about it. Don't rush into a decision. I'm sorry for saying that out of the blue. I should be grateful if you already want to live with me there."

Shortly after I finished talking, he turned to me, looked at me before affirming, "Daehyun, you're getting married. There's no point if you tell me that."

"Who said that?!" I almost shouted.

"Donghwa told me. He said you were getting married and would leave me if I choose to live with you."

I laughed all of a sudden when I heard his statement. That might be true but it wasn't completely true.

"And you believe?" I shook my head, then explained, "How could I do that? My father told me to get married, but the marriage would never happen because you're my only reason to stick whit my decision. Trust me."

"Daehyun, how can I trust you?" he asked hoarsely. "I can no longer trust anyone. I've lost that trust in myself. That's also what makes me always doubt you, you know."

I assured, "Don't hesitate. Trust me."

"Heh, how can I you do it? Someone who I thought never make me down, made me down. Someone who I thought never hurt me, hurt me. Someone I thought never leave me, left me. Tell me how to trust someone again." There was a painful smile at the end of his sentence, showing how he was trying to endure the pain from it all.