Chapter 379 - Extra 27: Kurama the Barbarian (1/2)*

*Based on [The Fairly OddParents: Timmy the Barbarian] and the [Dave the Barbarian] series.

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"Again?" - Tsunade asked as she looked at her husband as she felt his whole body was frozen.

Kurama was currently cursing how stupid he was for handing Naruto the book he and Kushina had created.

"Only you come up with the brilliant idea of handing Naruto a book with the ability to create an illusory world" - Kurotsuchi said neutrally.

"I just hope it's not like the last f.u.c.k.i.n.g time" - muttered Tayuya fearfully - "I still remember what a pain in the a.s.s it was to find the One Piece."

*All right, today's story is a very special one, one that will be full of adventures, mysteries, and possibly Tayuya's death*.

"Hey!" - Tayuya exclaimed angrily upon hearing Naruto's voice because this showed that he had started with his story.

The young Uzumaki prince was in the bedroom of his younger siblings, Mashiro, Shizune's daughter, Kureha, Tsume's daughter, and finally Shiki, Kaguya's son.

*Kurama, the strongest of the barbarians, was searching for the mystical sphere of the 5 elements, accompanied by his faithful companions, Tsunade, the pack cow*.

"Hey!" - Tsunade shouted as her attire changed to a white bikini with black spots and a headband of cow horns appeared on top of her head - "Not so bad!"

But her expression changed as she felt the weight of the world fall on her back - "Ugh, I take it back."

*Kurotsuchi, his trusty sword that was as flat as the desert of Suna*.

"Hey!" - Kurotsuchi exclaimed as his body took the shape of a sword.

"Ironically it's still just as flat" - said Tayuya as he lifted his c.h.e.s.t proudly.

"When I get my body back, you're going to pay for your words" - said Kurotsuchi as she gritted her teeth in fury.

*And finally his last companion, Tayuya, the horrible witch with sailor's mouth*

"Okay, this is personal, you little red monkey!" - Tayuya roared as he saw how her face was now green, with multiple wrinkles and bulges that seemed to explode at any second.

*Maybe I should be the ugly, screaming, hairy witch with fleas*

"Praise the piece of shit!" - Tayuya shouted as tears ran down her eyes - "I mean, Naruto-sama!"

*That's better, anyway, the group was beginning their quest and they had heard that the item they needed was in the hands of a great goblin that dwelled under the bridge*

"Pff, a goblin, how hard can it be" - Tayuya said with disdain.

"I hope you're not a bird of ill omen" - said Kurotsuchi neutrally.

"Calm your non-existent b.o.o.b.s, stone girl" - said Tayuya with disdain.

"At least my face doesn't look like something out of a horror movie" - snorted Kurotsuchi disdainfully as Tayuya started cursing Kurama's son.

* * *

The group continued on their journey until they came to a river so small, one could cross it by taking a small jump.

"Why the f.u.c.k is there a bridge on this river when one can jump across it!" - Tayuya exclaimed as she looked at the bridge which was a meter long - "And why does such a small bridge have handrails!"

Kurama, Kurotsuchi and Tsunade, just kept silent as they watched the girl walk towards the bridge, only to hear Naruto's voice.

*But she tripped over an insect*.

"Ah!" - Tayuya felt something make her fall, only to start rolling and end up with her face kissing the bridge's handrail - "Ugh."

"Somehow I saw that coming" - Kurama said as Tsunade nodded, only to frown as the ground began to shake.

"How does such a big person, live under such a small bridge!" - Tayuya shouted as she watched the bridge rise, revealing a silhouette at least 4 meters tall.

"Who dares to disturb the great Kiba, the Troll who lives under the bridge!" - Shouted a brown man with pointed ears wearing what appeared to be animal skins.

"Shouldn't he be a goblin?" - Tsunade asked.

"We had a budget to spare for a better cast" - Kiba replied as he shrugged - "Now, I'll destroy you!"

"I think he's taking his role too well" - said Kurama seriously - "Anyway, you'd better hand over the Five Element Sphere to us."

"Sphere?" - Kiba c.o.c.ked his head in confusion.

"The chewable ball" - Tsunade said, only to growl when she heard how Kiba informed them that he no longer had it in his possession.

"My head is starting to hurt" - muttered Kurama as he grabbed the bridge of his nose - "Whatever, we'd better get on with the journey."

"You won't get through without a fight!" - Kiba roared fiercely.

"Can you please not talk so much?" - Tsunade said as she pinched her nose - "You have such bad breath that you looked like you were eating out of the garbage, plus you stink!"

"The water in the river doesn't run much, so it's a bit stagnant" - Kiba replied while scratching his cheek.

"You don't think it has to do with your body covering 95% of the river?" - Tsunade asked while frowning - "I still don't understand how a cute girl like Haku, got interested in someone who doesn't even know how to take care of his personal hygiene."

"Destroyed in seconds" - muttered Kurotsuchi as she saw how a depressive aura surrounded the body of the huge troll - "And I thought Tayuya's mouth was lethal."

"We'd better continue" - said Kurama as he jumped the river next to Tsunade and carried Kurotsuchi on his back.

"Wait for me!" - Tayuya shouted as she ran after them.

*But she tripped over an insect*.

Only to fall into the river, which as Kiba had said, was stagnant - "Oh god, some water got into my mouth!"

* * *

The group continued on their "epic" journey as they searched for the mystical object that would give them absolute 'power'.

* * * Let's see, the journey through the ramen fields, let's go through * * * *.

"What!" - Kurama shouted as he cried as he watched the area change.

*The Casino Zone with a 99.9% chance of victory, either*.

"Oh, come on!" - Tsunade shouted as Kurama patted her shoulder.

*The trip through the stuffed animal trees, for next time!*

". . ." - Kurotsuchi trembled slightly as she bit her lip as she watched the stuffed animals disappear.

*The tour of the pink princess area, sorry*.

Tayuya only kept silent as she blushed as felt the gaze of those present.

*The trip to the Uzumaki Amazon Island, sorry, you're too young for that*.

Kurama's tears just ran, as the girls looked s.e.xy in those clothes.

*Here we are! The Valley of Rainbow's End*.

The area changed to colorful mountains surrounded by rainbows.

*No, that doesn't sound so epic, I know, Disco Valley!

The area changed to a disco dance floor and they started dancing.

*I know! The Valley of the End of Pain!

The area again changed and was now a gloomy mountain, being illuminated by the constant lightning falling from the sky.

"What am I doing here?" - Nagato asked as he looked around in confusion - "I swore I was dead."

*Sorry, that wasn't my intention*.

Nagato watched this with a frown, only to disappear in a matter of seconds, leaving Kurama and the others at a loss for words.

*We'd better pretend that didn't happen*.

"Ok" - nodded the participants as they shook their heads.

"Do you think this is where the blessed sphere is?" - Tsunade asked as she looked in the direction of the chasm of the huge mountain.

"I hope so" - answered Kurama while squinting his eyes- "By the way, according to the information we conveniently got, the ruler of this area is Queen Banshee, and I'm sure who it's about."

Tsunade didn't answer because it was obvious that she also knew who it was about, after all, she had heard about her student's manner when she was a child.

Tayuya for her part just kept silent as she carefully climbed up, but her expression changed when she heard Naruto's voice.

*But she tripped over an insect*.

Tayuya quickly started to roll down the hill as she tripped over the blessed insect, only to feel her face impact a dry tree - "You don't know how much I hate you."

*The feeling is mutual*

"We'd better keep going" - Kurama said as he saw how Tayuya was once again at the bottom of the mountain.

"I'm thankful that I have a good relationship with Naru-chan" - muttered Tsunade as she wiped her sweat. Her treatment could be considered a blessing compared to the poor pink-haired girl.

"In retrospect, being a sword isn't so bad" - nodded Kurotsuchi as a huge smile appeared on her lips as she saw all the misfortunes Tayuya had gone through.

The Kurama team continued to traverse the mountain until they finally reached a cave entrance that seemed to be covered in spider webs.

"Let's get this over with before my back breaks" - Tsunade said as she grunted in pain.

"I'm sorry I can't help you" - Kurama replied with a sigh. He had tried to take the luggage Tsunade was carrying, only to notice how it seemed to be stuck to her.

"No worries" - Tsunade replied calmly as the 3 of them entered the cave.