Chapter 53 - One Step At A Time

(From Ella's Perspective)

I could not look away. It was like a moment that needed to be captured, that was worthy of stopping time. My eyes seemed to be determined to look deep into his eyes, even though I wanted to look away very badly. He was not looking away either. I wondered if he wanted to look away as well, but could not. 

I looked down and walked up to him, though it took half of my strength to do so. He was still looking at me like that. How was he doing that? 

"It's rude to stare at people for that long," he said. 

"You're the one staring," I said.

"You did that too."

"Perhaps," I said. "But you're not people. You're Leandro."

"So what am I then?"

"I know you. So, it's not wrong to stare at you. And besides, I was just seeing if you're all that grumpy or not," I said while at the same time wondering if he could see through me. If he could, then the thing was very embarrassing.

"So what did you see?"

I glanced up at him and tried to examine his facial expression. Handsome was the only word that had been running inside my head. 

"Um... You're not angry anymore. But_ you're not sure how to tell something. You want to do something so bad, but you are thinking of others will approve or something like that. I don't know. I know it seems strange, right? Don't laugh if I'm wrong," I said. 

I noticed that he was not laughing. There was a serious expression on his face that was very hard to read. 

"I'm right?" I asked.

"Let's go home, Ella. You will get half-marked tonight," he said and started walking. He always behaved like that. Whenever I asked something that would make him think twice, he would start walking away. 

"You haven't told me what this is."

"Let's go home first."

Did he realize what he had just said? He had said it before too, but I had not noticed it. But this time, I clearly felt the exact meaning of this word. Yes, he was my home. It did not matter if we were living in the cave or not, I was sure that wherever he went, it would be my home as well. 

"Ok," I said, grinning. 

On the way back, when we reached the place where he kissed me all of a sudden, I felt my cheeks heating up. Especially walking past the tree where he pressed me against, it was getting too much. 

"Um... You never told me that there were others in this forest? I thought it was just you who lived here," I said, trying to change the awkward atmosphere. Perhaps it was just me who was awkward. He seemed to enjoy my embarrassment. 

"Is that what you want to know right now?" he asked, smirking.

"Yes!" I said loudly. 

"Don't need to be so loud. Alright, if you want to know... They are the ones who bring me the news."

"I thought I bring you news. How could you let them do the same thing I do for you? Come on, Leandro. That's not fair. I thought we were..."

"What? Finish your sentence, Ella."

"Nothing. Never mind, well, if they are bringing news for you, then my work is in vain?"

"It's not like that. They bring me the news outside the castle and we're working on forming a..."

"Team? To fight against your brother? Am I part of the team? I can fight too. I mean, I never learned that myself, but hey, I smacked and punched a lot of people. So that's not going to be a problem, right? You can take me to your team. You're the leader, right? Of course, you're the leader. You're the strongest one, right? So what's my position? Can I be your assistant? No, I want to be the spy."

"You're already the spy, El. They can't bring information about what's going on inside the castle. They are shifters."

"All of them?"

"Yes. They can't get inside the castle. And besides, Nicklaus knows that they are on my side. So, there is no way, they can join his side and work for him to bring me information. They look for shifters around this world and bring them here to join our side. And you're the only one who brings the information of the inside," he said.

"Really? That's cool! It means you have trusted me all the time. Why haven't you told me this before? Were you shy?" I asked, poking him on the arm. 

"Is it easy to tell about all the truth that your heart is holding?" he asked, his gaze straight ahead of us. 

"No," I replied and we both knew that this conversation was better if it ended right there. 

"So am I in the team?" I asked.

"What do you think?" 

"I don't know. Perhaps I'm not. I mean, I'm not powerful like you all, I'm not a shifter. It's true that I blabbered a lot about how I'm perfect to be in the team, but now that I think of it, I actually don't have much talent. So maybe I'm not in the team," I said. 

"You were in the team since we made the deal, little El," he said. 

"Really?" I asked, overly excited.

"Is it hard to believe?"

"No. I mean, yes. I don't..."

"You have a lot of talents, Ella. It's just you who can't see it," he said, cutting me off and I could not help but feel like he was telling the truth. 

"Is that a compliment?" 

"Do you have to say it like that?"

"No, I'm just surprised. But it felt good to hear," I said.

"Get used to it then," he said. "There are more to come." 

"You've changed, Leandro," I muttered. 

"Is that so?"

"Yeah. You changed a lot."

"Don't you like the change?"

I smiled. "I've always liked you, before and after the change," I said and held his hand before pulling him with me as I ran. 

I knew I was the first one to say this. But now that I thought about it, it was better if I let it out. And I was going to do so, slowly. I was going to take one step at a time very carefully so I would not get hurt and more importantly, so I could understand more of him and what I was feeling. 

"Go slow, El. You'll fall," he said. 

"You're just afraid that you'll fall," I said. 

"Is that so?"

"You're old. That's why you don't have much strength."

"Are you talking about my capability, little Ella?"

I blushed, even with the strong wind falling on my face, I could not help but feel a warm feeling through my veins. 

"No, not at all," I said quickly. 

But I truly wondered how he was... God! I was losing my mind being with him all the time. But I_ liked it as well. 

By the time, we reached the cave, I felt as if I did not inhale air for years. I was panting, resting my hands on my knees. 

"You're tired already?"

"Don't look at me like that. Anyone is supposed to be tired after this much time of running," I said panting.

"Come on in now and take a bath. You're sweaty," he said. 

"Then you'll tell me what this marking thing meant?"

"I will."

"And we need to find a shifter as well. I can't believe you didn't let him find me a shifter."

"I think I told you to trust me about this one."

"I trust you, but..."

"Then take a shower and try to relax," he said, leaving me puzzled.

He never told anything clearly. There was always some kind of mystery in his words. But I liked thinking about his words and trying to find the real meaning behind them. It seemed to turn into a habit of mine. 

I went to the bathroom to take a shower. I could not help but think about what happened in the forest. Was he right? I knew the answer myself, but I still could not bring myself to believe it. 

When it came to believing someone, I always struggled. It was all because of those who broke my trust that night, who made me think that trusting someone fully with one's heart was the biggest and hardest decision anyone could take. It was even harder than loving someone. 

Because when you love someone, it's easy to let go of other things. You can love someone without trusting them fully, and perhaps you're not going to realize that you can't trust them because of your love for them. But if you trust someone with your heart with no regrets, no turning back- then love becomes even sweeter.. Perhaps I was a craver for sweeter things.