Chapter 57 - Excited To Be Marked

(From Leandro's Perspective)

"Yes. I mean, you might be mysterious a bit, but not exactly cold, at least from the inside. You care even though you try not to show it. And I've seen something behind your eyes that doesn't speak of your coldness."

"Oh come on, I'm proud to be with you. You're handsome and he is a sea horse. I have the most handsome co-worker. Of course, I should be proud."

"Because_ I would not do anything but stay here. But it's your place. Why would you let me stay here if I don't do anything? I'm not a lifeless thing that I don't need anything; I need food, water, a place to sleep and bathe. You could easily keep a stone here without wanting anything back from it. Firstly because it's lifeless. And secondly, you won't have to give it anything. But I'm not a stone. I'm not lifeless, Leandro. I'm a human and I need things to live."

"It's life, Leandro. Nothing is free. I-I can't. No matter what you say, I can't stay with you without doing anything in exchange."

"I trust you. I trust you with my life. I know you will not let anything happen to me. But, Leandro, I don't trust you with my heart."

"You're not angry anymore. But_ you're not sure how to tell something. You want to do something so bad, but you are thinking if others will approve or something like that. I don't know. I know it seems strange, right?"

"I've always liked you, before and after the change."

"No, it's not that. I think I'm not worthy of being marked by you. I mean, I'm so weak and pathetic. Why would you want to mark me?"

"Me? Huh! No, I don't have any crush. Why would I? I mean, I don't really find anyone that attractive to have a crush on. And besides, I still don't understand the thing going on with crush. I understand that liking someone excessively is possible. But I don't think there is a meaning of one-sided liking. It doesn't have any end in the end. If one finds another person attractive and the other person doesn't feel the same way and it's too obvious, then I think the best option is to let go. It will save two persons' emotional health."

"Only my emotions. I don't really care about others that much. Caring about someone's physical being is easy. Like you can save someone's life or something like that easily. But if you actually want to care about someone's emotions, then the person must be very close to you or special in your life. I never had anyone like that. Why would I care?"

"I know. But I prefer being like this. Because in this way, some people hate you and some people like you. The people liking you is less, but they are real, not those fake ones who are with you for taking advantage of you."

The more I thought about all the things she told me, the more I could understand the hidden meanings behind them. It was like she was making puzzles for me- the kind of puzzles that I was eager to solve. 

I needed to know about her life back in her world. Now that she had promised me, I knew that she was going to tell me about her life and she was not going to lie. She was not the kind of person to lie to hide the truth or her feelings. She would prefer not to say, but she would not lie. 

I could not keep my eyes away from her sleeping face. She looked at ease which was something I had never seen on her face. Her lips were parted slightly, as if ready to be tasted. I might be considered the bad guy in this case, but I could not help it. 

I brought my face down to her and took her in for a kiss. She did not wake up, just shifted slightly. I kissed her passionately, chewing on her lips, taking her taste in. 

"Uh...," she moaned lightly. 

"Shit!" I cursed under my breath and left the room quickly. It was getting worse. If I stayed there one more minute, I could not even think of what could happen. 

She slept until night. I did not wake her up. She needed to rest, especially after the things she was going through. She would never admit it, but I knew that she was tired. She just pretended to be unaffected. 

"Uh, my head hurts. Wait, what time is it? Did I sleep too long? I don't feel good. What's wrong with me? I feel too rested," she panicked.

"Is it wrong to feel rested?" I asked. I was not anymore surprised to see her reactions in certain cases, though her words surprised me a lot.

"I'm just not used to it. What time is it?"

"It's 12 at night," I replied. 

"Great! Now I slept all day. No wonder I look like a sloth right now," she grumbled. 

"Come on and have dinner."

"Will you mark me after that?" 

"Yes."

She looked kind of excited about the marking thing. She perhaps did not think of it as something very serious. Did she not understand that even though I was half marking her, she was going to be mine till death? Rather, she behaved as if it was something normal and not a big deal at all. 

"Why are you so excited?" I asked as I watched her finish her meal very quickly. 

"It's going to be cool! I mean, it's a new thing. Besides, I'll be able to know if I really have shifter blood."

"Only for this, you're so excited?" I asked tiredly.

"You're behaving old..."

"You call me old another time, I'll show you the truth myself."

"Sorry, I won't call you old again. Lord, you're so intriguing," she muttered. 

"Do you believe in God?"

"Me?"

"There isn't anyone else here, Ella."

"No, I don't."

"Then why do you use words like 'God', 'Lord' so much?"

"They are easy to use. That's why," she said. 

"You're strange."

"I know. People say that a lot."

"I'm not people, you said so before. And I'm not saying you're strange in a bad manner. It's just you're so different."

After both of us were done, I saw Ella waiting expectantly for me. Why was she this excited about the whole thing? It was true that I was excited to make her mine as well even though if it meant that she was going to be half mine. But surely she was more excited than I was. 

"When are you going to mark me?" she asked.

"Go wear something from which I can get your right shoulder easily," I said and she hurried off to the closet without asking any more questions. 

"My oversized shirt is wet... I washed it. And the long t-shirt is dirty... I..."

"Wear my shirt," I said. 

"Are you sure?"

"Wear any of them. You're so little. They would be very big on your body. It will be easier for me to get your shoulder."

"Ok."

I waited for her in the study room as she changed. After two minutes, she said that she was done. I knew that telling her to wear my shirt was not good for my present condition where I was on the verge of losing control with her, but I still took the risk. I wanted to see how she looked in my shirt. 

She wore one of my black shirts that went right above her knees, the sleeves were way too long for her and it was very loose-fitting. She looked even tinier in that shirt. But her long brown hair all over her back made her look like a_ princess. 

"Is it okay?" she asked. I recalled the day when she wore my sister's dress that I had given her. She had asked me the same thing that day and I could not say anything, but nod. I was afraid of saying that she looked perfect. 

"Yes."

"Do I look bad?" she asked. "I know this is not a time to look good, but still. I mean, you're going to mark me, right? What if I look so bad that you'll get scared and stop marking me?"

"Don't worry, little one.. It's true that only you can scare me, but I won't get scared of you tonight, not when you look so_ perfect."