Chapter 4

"You look like hell." Shelly said as she greeted me at the front door of the church. I shrugged. I wore a knee long black skirt, red blouse with ruffles along the color that hid most of my middle. "Look, Candice, I don't want you to continue this if it's going to hurt you." I shrugged again.

"It hurts just the same if he does marry her. So there is no difference." We walked down the aisle where her mother, Jason and Olyvia was sitting. It has always been our bench. If she was going to be there every Sunday it was about time I establish my own bench away from them to sit. I sat on the end as Shelly sat next to her mother. I felt Jason's eyes on me as I looked over the sermon for the morning. I sighed, placing my elbow on the bench arm, reading over it, my head on my hand. I noticed how Olyvia's head was up turned as she made comments about how the church looked to her and they weren't nice ones. I mentally crossed my fingers hoping that this will finally break him. But he seemed not to be paying any attention to her comments. I moved the stray curl that wouldn't come out of my hair that morning when I blow dried my hair. I hoped it wouldn't give anything away. Shelly watched me do that as the choir started up. I stood along with everyone else. I didn't sing like I normally did but looked around always enjoying the beauty of God's house. I followed along in the book. Then we sat. All I could hear was Olyvia criticizing the church I loved. I sighed looking forward but not completely seeing the preacher. After he was done preaching we stood to sing again. I didn't sing along and after that it was coffee hour. I turned, sat my book down and grabbed my purse.

"You going down stairs?" Shelly asked.

"I normally do right?" I said as we walked out into the hallway. We went down the steps as I heard Jason and Olyvia talking in the hall way that we just left.

"She was criticizing everything." Shelly said as she grabbed a cup for coffee. I grabbed one and took a green tea.

"I know. I don't see her converting. What religion is she?"

"Suppose to be christian. But the way she acts you'd think she was an Atheist." I laughed as we took a cookie each and went to sit at a table. "She disappeared last night in the middle of the party. No one knew where she went. Mike said he didn't see either her or Henry for a while. After you left I asked Jason where he was. He just looked at me, said he was out on the balcony thinking."

"And confessing love to a total stranger." More people started coming down as we lowered our voice. Through the people you could hear Olyvia's annoying voice even criticizing the coffee hour.

"He did seem a little off. He even went to bed early after asking where Olyvia went. When we all said we didn't know he left the hall. My guess was to go look for her. I don't like it one bit." I took a sip from my tea. Olyvia was talking to their mother and Jason was looking right over at us. I looked down at my cup, my cheeks turning the bright pink.

"He's going to come over." I said low. She looked up.

"Already heading this way." She said taking a drink from her cup along with it went a cookie bite. He wore one of his dark blue suits, white button up shirts with a black tie. His dark hair slicked back like it had been for work. I stirred my tea pretending it was the most interesting thing in the room.

"So what devious plan are you two working up in the corner over here?" He asked almost pleasantly as if his to be bride hadn't just downed the church he also loved and cherished. Shelly just laughed, waved her arm once.

"Oh you know us Jason."

"Like the back of my hand." He said smirking to his sister then looking at me. "Are you alright Candice?" I nodded not saying anything moving that small little curl to behind my ear as he watched it.

"She's just tired."

"Why's that?" He asked putting his lean tanned hands on the chair across from me looking right down at me. I shrugged.

"Didn't get a lot of sleep I guess." I said now looking up at him. He looked as if he didn't get a lot either. Under his brilliant blue eyes were dark rings, his face looked older then his thirty years allowed. "After I get the rooms cleaned, Jason. Did you need my services anymore?" I asked slanting my head slightly. He stood there for a minute, shifted his weight, not taking his eyes off me as he answered.

"Not that I know of. Got plans?" I shook my head. "Then how are you going to afford your parents house?"

"Sell it." I said taking a sip of my tea as I heard him gasp.

"Don't sell it." He said his voice husky as he said that. Shelly and I both looked up at him at the same time. "I can find something for you to do." I shook my head.

"No need." I said with a fake smile. "I only have two rooms left. A week and a half maybe two to get them cleaned.

"Why are we talking business on a Sunday?" Jason asked his hands I noticed tightening at the chair. I shrugged, scooted the chair and stood looking down at Shelly.

"Seven, Omar's?"

"That's what I was thinking." She said chuckling. "Mexican last week, Italian this week. Sure! Then we can hit a movie afterwards." I nodded, turning to move around the table when I noticed Olyvia grasping Jason's arm as he stood. His face went from calm to irritated as if she had entered a private conversation.

"Don't worry about it." I said just as pleasant as she had asked the question. She looked over at me. "I wasn't even going to go. It would just be wrong of me to support this union. Shelly has to because she's a part of the family. But as I am not, and just a black sheep, I don't have to witness the charade. Besides, I have plans that weekend. Don't want to interrupt your happy day." I grabbed my purse as I left the table. Olyvia was wailing at Jason. As I went up the steps I heard her yelling and as I reached the top, that long lean hand grasped my wrist as I was pulled against the wall of the stair way. I gasped not believing that he would do that. He looked down at me, his hands next to him giving me the chance to leave. I looked up at him, my eyes shooting sparks as I went to go up the steps. His hands came next, on either side of my head. I pressed so close to the wall that I felt the cold cement against my back.

"You owe me an explanation."

"I don't owe you shit." I said low as people started to come up the steps. They had nodded at Jason who nodded back smiling but kept his hands against the wall. I moved the curl back as he looked back over at me. My head held high as he looked down at me. He had me by height a good foot. Maybe foot and a half. "I don't owe her shit. I don't owe yo u shit. And I don't owe your mother shit." I rearranged my purse on my shoulder. "I am sure after the wedding, after maybe a few months, you will kick into a habit and do exactly what your doing now. Let her rule your life. Besides, Jason," I said his name with acid dripping. His expression changed from being pissed to a blank stare witch I knew he was thinking. "Your not allowed around me anymore. Right? So what does it matter what I do with my life. My parents house. You'll have your hands full with the business and a cheating wife then to bother with me." He went to say something, his tongue licking his lips as he went to move closer to me.

"Jason." I heard his mother. He looked down at her as all I did was look pissed up at him. He moved from the wall, looked down at me before I went up the steps to leave the church. I got to my car, the tears spilling as I opened the door, turned the car on and left for home.