Chapter 1-22: The Human Tongue

I remained in Meditation until Father Bower came out. Couldn’t hurt to foster tighter connections with the local manafield, after all.

I broke out before he could turn away and leave me alone, as disturbing someone in Meditation was a huge faux pas.

“Father,” I greeted him, my minor levitation trick fading away with the swirly lights of mana draw. “I am intending to go into town to acquire a workable staff. Did you want to arrange something with the Human tongue before then?”

He turned back quickly. “Good morning, Miss Traveler. Yes, I have already spoken to someone who would like to film your whole sequence of teaching the Human tongue. They are in the camp, and said they would have the room set up this morning.”

“I find myself with absolutely nothing else to do, so if you would like to send me over there, I will take care of that.”

“Of course!” he agreed with a wide white smile.

----

Letting his staff know where he would be, Father Bower escorted me through the camp, as obviously a civilian shouldn’t be wandering around without one.

“You seem quite eager to get this done, Father,” I noted with some amusement, glancing at his serious face.

“I have spoken to some senior members of the Church, and they have made very unambiguous statements that this project is something that should be done as soon as possible, and with as little interference as possible.”

I rolled an eye at him. “You are expecting some sort of divine countermove?” I inquired calmly, and he actually looked sharply at me.

“Yes, actually. This is something that could actually unite the entire world under one language, finally. There are powerful forces who do not want this to happen.”

“That is true. Languages have always been a great barrier to mutual understanding.” I flicked my clothes. “If they are filming this, I am afraid that I am not really dressed for the occasion.” A t-shirt and jeans, however, clean, weren’t exactly photogenic.

“They said they would find some suitable clothing for you.” He realized that might be a little forward, and blushed a bit. “Purely as a formality.”

“Oh, understood. A simple white throw-over would probably be enough.” This face was good-looking enough that even with my black eyes I could attract attention, at least judging by all the heads constantly turning my way...

Reminded me of Diana... who would no doubt be laughing her ass off at this situation, and wagging her finger knowingly. This was what I got for once being part of the most powerful Caster around underneath a Goddess of Magic...

---

The building was kind of pillboxy and unadorned, but that wasn’t unexpected. They weren’t going to invest in good looks just outside a wall containing a lot of undead.

I was shown into the back, a fairly spacious room that could hold a decently large meeting, all the chairs off to the sides, and the stage up there set with a black backdrop. A couple cameras were set up on rollers, lights shining, and the people around to start shooting.

The guy who came up to greet me was skinny and looked rather care-worn in his patterned dress shirt, loose tie, and needing a shave. He looked me over in open interest and curiosity before turning to Father Bower.

“<Father>,” he greeted the Cleric of Harse respectfully. “<Is this her?>”

Ah. I put my thumb up to my ear again. “Maybe I will learn Englits again some day, just so I can tell when people are being rude and not introducing themselves properly.”

He froze for a second at his gaffe. “<Sorry... Paul Harrison. Just trying to set up things properly, Miss... Traveler?>” he asked hesitantly.

“That is correct, Mr. Harrison.” I flicked an eye over his set-up, marveling inside. I hadn’t seen anything so technology-related in years. All that stuff had mostly melted down or rotted away. They were so lucky that magic and tech functioned side-by-side here. “You want me to change my attire?”

“<Yes, Shelly has some clothing that should look a bit better than, ah, Wall Mage attire.>” He indicated a plump black woman nearby, who smiled at me. I inclined my head and headed off to her, leaving the nervous director to the cleric.

---

Shelly looked me up and down with an experienced eye. “<They probably haven’t even noticed that those weren’t cut for a woman>,” she clucked. “<Did you change the fit with magic?>”

“That is correct. The state my original clothing was in rather necessitated usage of any clothing immediately available, and I haven’t been able to visit the local boutiques. This has been serviceable, and I’m attractive enough to make almost anything look good on me.”

She looked at me as if she wasn’t sure I’d just said all that, and I just looked back at her. “<Well, you’ve definitely got the confidence side of this down pat, and all you elf-bloods are so damn photogenic, this shouldn’t be a problem. I didn’t have your sizes, but I’m thinking that as long as it was a little big, this shouldn’t be an issue?>”

“Very true. I don’t want to be shot in a skirt, so a well-cut blouse should be sufficient. I can change the color of my pants to blend in, and I actually have a decent pair of shoes.” I lifted them out of my purse, where they’d been sitting for a few days.

She bent forward to inspect them despite herself, turned them over, and hissed. “<Hollenglocks! You’ve got expensive tastes, girl!>”

“And that surprises which of us?” I had to ask, and she laughed despite herself.

“<Well, I ain’t got nothing that expensive, but this blouse should set off that hair.>” She shook her head, staring at my hair enviously. “<You Casters, how do you get such awesome hair?>” she asked rhetorically, and I just smiled, shrugging off my scavenged leather jacket and tossing it on a table nearby.

I snapped my finger, pointing at the blouse she presented, and suddenly she was holding onto my t-shirt, and I was in the blouse. She blinked in surprise, then again as I snapped my fingers, and it shrank around me as if custom fit, tucked into my jeans, and by all the eyes turning my way, I judged I was definitely worth the looking at.

I snapped my fingers and switched my shoes out, and she indicated a pair of black slacks hanging there, getting them off the hangar and holding them out to me.

Snap, and I swapped out, complete with the belt. Another snap, and they shrank around me as if made for me.

She eyed the jeans in her hand, which definitely did not have the same cut as when I’d been wearing them, i.e. they were a man’s pair of jeans. “<Should I even ask?>” she wondered aloud, lifting them.

“Given the amount of blood involved, no,” I replied. At least the shoes weren’t heels, and I wasn’t going to wear a set of those anytime soon, regardless. “Passable? I’m not too obsessed with make-up.”

“<Girl, you got skin like china. Why would you care about powdering it? We just have to accent those eyes and cheekbones a little more, and we’re set.>” I stood there calmly as she got out a kit and pencils and brushes, and expertly set about her thing. “” she assured me.

“Halvyr is the proper term,” I corrected her calmly. “Elf-bloods is rather insulting, you know.”

“Halvyr.” She turned the word around in her mouth. “<I’ll remember it, in the future.>”

“Make sure you are paying attention during this entire shoot. You’ll end up speaking Human, too,” I told her, as she drew on my face.

“<That’s all for real? Damn right I will!>” she assured me, and I waited patiently while she hummed and finished up with me.

-----

“<Now, Miss Traveler, we’ve got everything all set up for you. Let me go over how we’re going to play this->”

I chopped my hand and cut him off abruptly. “I need three students, including yourself. This will be a straight, repetitious, hour-long exchange of give and take. I’m not going to be doing any kind of a song-and-dance routine, wandering around, or doing glitzy side effects. The magic of you learning your genetic language works best if you do nothing but learn your genetic language.” I raised my voice and looked around at the half-dozen others in the room. “That includes all of you. I expect you to be responding when I talk, if you would like to learn this. Am I clear?”

There was hesitation, and then confirmations from all around.

“Now, set your shoot up right there, in the middle of everything. Make it look messy and casual. The less this seems like a professional bit of chicanery and more like an informal get-together of interested people, the better. There will be no multiple takes, and if we flub up, we flub up. That creates more conversational material, which will aid the process.”

I slid one of the chairs over with a gesture, off the stage, and parked it down on the floor. “I will be sitting here.” I waved my finger, and a five-foot square glowed in the air next to me. “This is the hologram area I will use to convey the written portion of the language. Devote one of your cameras here, as I will be reflecting anything and everything being said around me in Human on the screen.” My words scrolled across it, and they all had peculiar looks on their faces as the unfamiliar characters glowed... and they could read them perfectly.

The Human Tongue.

“Now, your volunteers? Shelly, if you will?”

The wardrobe woman hustled up with a smile, grabbing a chair and plunking down opposite me quickly. Mr. Harrison looked a little lost, but gave quick orders to move a couple of the cameras, and gestured one of gophers over to the third chair.

They all sat down, as did I. The cameras were already rolling, but I went on. “Now, don’t edit out anything. One unbroken conversation from beginning to end is how magical things work best. Chop it up, and you are breaking the continuity of what is going on, and it will be incomplete for those watching.

“Now, introductions. My name is Traveler. It has been brought to my attention that the vast majority of humans don’t know their own genetic language. This video is being shot so that process can be rectified.

“Halvyr like myself don’t automatically know the Human language, but we can learn it easily, just like we can Elvish. You will notice that what I am saying sounds unfamiliar to you, but you can understand everything. Likewise, the words scrolling across the Holo next to me are unfamiliar, but you can understand them. Is this true?”

They all nodded, then belatedly added “Yes,” in English when the Holo prompted them.

“You have a genetic language, just like Elves, Dwarves, and other species do, and it is brought out in a magical society. What we are going to do is go through some basics of the Human language. I am going to say them, you are going to repeat them while I accompany them with written images to give a reference.

“If you have questions, just speak up, and I will convert them to Human for all those watching.

“For all of you watching, just read and repeat where appropriate, and you will pick this up just as smoothly as the three students in front of me. Shall we begin?”

They nodded and said, “Yes,” drawn in despite themselves.

An image of an apple appeared on the Holo. “This is an apple.”

“This is an apple,” they repeated dutifully, and we were off...

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