Chapter 2 – A So-Called Awakening
Although Wen Muyan had phrased his sentence as a question, his tone was certain and hostile.
However, the response to his words was complete silence.
As well as a gaze that made him uncomfortable.
Looking at the indifferent man in front of him, Wen Muyan frowned a little and gently put his glasses back into his breast pocket.
“Xiao Han, Xiao-Fan is resting now. He doesn’t want to see you. I don’t want someone like you to hurt him again. Please go back.”
Xiao Han could hardly be bothered to pay him any attention, but he had to stop at the door of the ward, because Wen Muyan was blocking his way with his arm.
“Get out of my way.”
Wen Muyan frowned harder, speaking severely, “I’ll repeat myself: Xiao-Fan doesn’t want to see you. Please don’t hurt him anymore! His leg has already been burned, but it’s his heart that’s hurting even more! Don’t you think you’ve already hurt him deeply enough?”
Finding the accusation rather amusing, Xiao Han laughed, “Was it I who started the fire?”
Wen Muyan was taken aback, and then he heard the other man continue, “Instead of blaming the restaurant for the burns, you’re blaming me?”
Wen Muyan was furious. “Didn’t you care only about saving your old lover without bothering about Xiao-Fan’s life?”
“So, according to you, Chenli should have died?”
Wen Muyan did not lose his head in the other man’s logic. Instead, he caught the implication of the words and mocked, “So you can just go take care of your Chenli. Xiao-Fan has me. You don’t have to worry about him.”
Actually, I really don’t want to worry about him.
Xiao Han silently said that in his heart, but with his mouth he could only say:
“Zhuo Fan is my boyfriend. It’s only natural that I should come see him.” He raised the arm in front of him and opened the door.
Sure enough, Zhuo Fan was sitting on the bed in a daze, staring vacantly at the branches outside the window. When he heard the door open, he turned his head slowly and stared at Xiao Han’s familiar handsome face for a while. He then hoarsely mocked, “Aren’t I just ‘a friend’?”
After that, he turned his head back to look out of the window, as though he would suffer from sore eyes if he looked at Xiao Han for too long.
Xiao Han of course understood what he meant. So, as arranged by the script, he stood in front of the hospital bed “full of regret,” and looked at Zhuo Fan with “an expression of unprecedented sincerity.” Then, he said, “You know I never like to explain anything to people, but I hope my explanation today can make you feel better. That day, I didn’t intentionally abandon you to save Chenli. I just didn’t see you…”
“But you only shouted Liang Chenli’s name!” Zhuo Fan turned to look at him with rage, unable to suppress his emotions.
Xiao Han really wanted to ask Zhou Fan why he hadn’t called out when he heard him in the washroom, but the script would not let him embarrass the little bottom like that. So he could only look ashamed and whisper, “I only wanted to bring him out before going back for you…”
“So, I will always be Liang Chenli’s stand-in in your heart! Forever second place!” Zhuo Fan cried out the complaint buried in his heart for many years. He felt relieved, relaxed, dizzy, and fell back onto his pillow, his chest heaving.
Wen Muyan was frightened and hurried over to sooth him. His face was annoyed but his tone was tender, “Xiao-Fan, the doctor said that emotional excitement is not good for your condition. This kind of fellow is not worth your sadness at all. Promise me, don’t pay any more attention to what he has to say, okay?”
“Muyan, thank you. Fortunately, I have you here with me.”
“Xiao Fan, we grew up together. No need to be so polite with me.”
After Muyan comforted him for a while, Zhuo Fan gradually calmed down.
Xiao Han watched their exchange, left out in the cold despite being the official top. The script did it on purpose, of course. The original intention was to have the scum top “get extremely annoyed” with their intimacy, “inexplicably feel that Wen Muyan was a huge eyesore”, “Zhuo Fan was clearly his” and so on, and to experience such jealous emotions as though he had a split personality.
Yet, after watching for a long time, Xiao Han only did a very untimely thing — he accidentally yawned.
No choice. This romance was too boring. Anyone’s legs would start aching after standing for so long, okay?
Fortunately, however, the bottom and the deeply affectionate cannon fodder were too immersed in the pleasure of antagonising the scum top to realise what he had done.
Feeling that he had put in enough airtime, Xiao Han said in a low voice with a slightly worried tone, “You have a good rest. I’ll see you again tomorrow.”
As expected, he heard a cold reply from Zhuo Fan: “You don’t have to come again. I don’t want to see you anymore.”
Xiao Han paused appropriately, then walked out of the door indifferently and sat on the bench outside the door, waiting for the cannon fodder top to come out and find him.
Sure enough, in less than two minutes, Wen Muyan came out and was surprised to see Xiao Han at the door. It seemed that he had not expected this fellow to still remain here.
“I have something to tell you.” Wen Muyan put on his coat and glasses, “Come with me.”
Where else could they go? The underground carpark, of course.
Xiao Han leaned against the cool wall. Thinking about the scene of two men fighting over a third man out of jealousy, he found it particularly ridiculous. However, he had to suppress his laughter, which was a really difficult thing to do.
Wen Muyan pushed his glasses up and began with a serious look: “I repeat, please do not appear in front of Xiao-Fan again in the future.”
“Who are you?” Xiao Han did not want to mock the poor man in front of him, but according to the plot, he really didn’t even know the name of the other guy.
Wen Muyan paused, but he did not show an unhappy expression. Xiao Han did not know whether he really had a good temper or was just very good at hiding his feelings, “I’m Xiao-Fan’s childhood friend, Wen Muyan.”
Seeing that Xiao Han did not answer, Wen Muyan continued, “After turning a blind eye on all the things Xiao-Fan has done for you, what face do you have to make him come back to you? A man like you is not worthy of him at all!”
Xiao Han changed to another pose, still leaning against the wall, and said cooperatively, “How are you worthy then?”
“I am the one who truly loves Xiao Fan.” Wen Muyan solemnly uttered this sentence.
Xiao Han looked carefully at Wen Muyan, feeling both amusement and pity for the other man. He could not help it any longer, and so he smiled coldly, baring his teeth.
“I’m the one that Zhuo Fan loves, both in the past and in the future. I will not let him leave me.”
Xiao Han left this sentence as a parting shot, went forward to pat Wen Muyan on the shoulder, then walked away.
Of course, he had improvised that last action.
But in fact, Xiao Han was very troubled. His distress did not come from thinking about how to make Zhuo Fan change his mind. Instead, it came from the awareness that he would have to follow the script’s direction from now on and become a true loyal dog top — also commonly known as trash top.
This was unbearable!
But he did not know what would happen if he violated the script’s arrangements. In any case, it could never result in anything good.
After an arduous ideological struggle, Xiao Han decided to shower and sleep.
Early the next morning, Xiao Han went into the kitchen to prepare chicken soup, but became depressed when he saw the featherless chicken on the chopping board: he did not know how to do it!
But it did not matter, he had an omnipotent script!
So the chicken soup was swiftly prepared. You ask why there isn’t any worry about bird flu? Don’t be silly. There are so many gays in novels who don’t even use condoms, but have you seen any of them contracting AIDS?
When Xiao Han took the chicken soup to Zhuo Fan, Wen Muyan was not there.
“What are you doing here?” Zhuo Fan looked at him coldly. The warmth of the past was longer there.
Xiao Han felt “a pain in his heart.” He placed the soup on the table and served it, speaking slowly, “I see that you are so much thinner than before, so I cooked this myself. You have always been doing these things for me in the past, but I did not cherish them. I was wrong.”
Zhuo Fan was obviously surprised, but soon became sarcastic: “What do you take me for? A dog that you coax home with a little candied treat? I said that I never want to see you again!”
At this moment, the protagonist was supposed to not have realized the degree of despair felt by the bottom. He just regarded this as a common argument. So, Xiao Han scooped a spoonful of soup, blew on it and tried to feed Zhuo Fan. “I’ll go after I watch you finish this.”
Zhuo Fan closed his eyes and twisted his head away. The spoon moved along with him, completely ignoring his request for the other man to leave.
“I told you to leave!” Zhuo Fan felt that his self-esteem had been seriously trampled. He waved his hand angrily, overturning the bowl of chicken soup. The hot soup splashed on both of them. It was so hot that Zhuo Fan frowned and cried out.
Just then, the door of the ward opened again. Wen Muyan entered, carrying some lunch in his hands.
“Xiao Han! What have you done to Xiao-Fan?!”
Xiao Han had anticipated this incident. Hence, he had quickly avoided the soup splashing onto him while taking out the tissues that he had prepared earlier. He tried to wipe Zhuo Fan clean, but Zhuo Fan of course wanted to dodge him. Naturally, this struggle was obviously misunderstood by Wen Muyan.
A fist headed towards Xiao Han’s face!
However, it did not land on his face. Instead, it brushed past his cheek and he intercepted the attack by instantly grabbing the wrist.
Xiao Han felt the strength that had been thrown into the punch, and his face
He looked at Zhuo Fan out of the corners of his eyes. That fellow was still keeping his head averted indifferently, and did not spare him a single look.
Having missed, Wen Muyan’s fury would of course not abate. He immediately threw another punch towards Xiao Han’s lower abdomen!
Even though it was just acting, Xiao Han could not help getting angry for real. He turned sideways to dodge the second punch and jabbed his elbow into the stomach of his opponent. Wen Muyan, who was not good at fighting, immediately began to retch.
“Stop it!” When Zhuo Fan saw his good friend being beaten, how could he take it? He wanted to stop them, and immediately struggled to get out of bed. Of course, he ended up moving his injured leg and delightfully fell into the arms of cannon fodder top.
“Muyan, where are you injured?” Zhuo Fan looked at him with great self-reproach. “It’s my fault. I accidentally spilled the soup, which led to your misunderstanding, and now even hurt you.”
Wen Muyan gently embraced him and shook his head. “Of course I wouldn’t blame you.”
“Zhuo Fan, what happened to your leg?” Xiao Jun patiently pretended to show concern.
“It’s none of your concern! Xiao Han, why did you hit Muyan? The first person who came to see me after I was hospitalized was him, and he was the one who took care of me the entire time. What right do you have to beat him?” Zhuo Fan glared at Xiao Han angrily, his eyes filled with hatred.
Xiao Han sneered in his heart. It was fine for Wen Muyan to hit him, whereas he got an earful just for fighting back.
He tried to keep the plot going while suppressing his rage. With a dark expression on his face, he took a step forward and pulled Zhuo Fang from Wen Muyan’s arms, saying coldly, “Go home with me. From now on I’ll be the one to take care of you.”
“Let me go!” Zhuo Fan had hurt his leg. No matter how hard he struggled, he could not fight the other man off. So, he could only swing the other hand towards him as hard as he could.
“Slap — !”
Following this sound, the ward suddenly fell into silence.
After a second, Xiao Jun began to feel a hot pain spreading from his right cheek, and it became more and more painful.
What! The! Fuck!
What kind of sins did he commit in his previous life to get saddled with a script like this!
Xiao Han vomited a mouthful of old blood in his heart, but that was not the end. Zhuo Fan’s anger was not relieved with this slap. He looked out of the window indifferently and seemed too disdainful to look at him. “Xiao Han, I don’t love you anymore. Let’s break up. Don’t ever show up in front of me again.”
Xiao Han’s eyes gradually became dark and obscure. After staring at Zhuo Fan for a long time, he slowly turned and walked out of the ward.
But he did not go far, because the script made him sit by the door for the whole day, reflecting, before going in haggardly the next day to apologize to the man who had just slapped him.
Wen Muyan came over to support Zhuo Fan’s tottering body, saying with relief, “Xiao Han is an asshole. He only knows how to make you sad. That’s all right, you still have me.”
Zhuo Fan did not seem to have recovered from his trance. His eyes were a little uncertain. After Xiao Han left the room, he could not help but stare at the door. He unconsciously broke away from Wen Muyan’s support, forcing a laugh, “I’m all right. The doctor said that I can be discharged within the next few days.”
“Really? That’s great.” Wen Muyan put down his hands, which had become frozen in the air, and said with a smile.
“Mn…”
With a bang, the door opened once more, and Xiao Han appeared again!
Watching Xiao Han walk towards himself, Zhuo Fan frowned. He turned his face away tiredly and said in a quiet voice, “Xiao Han, let me go. No matter what you say now, I will never come back to you. Just give up. I don’t —”
He suddenly stopped in mid-sentence. Not because he was interrupted, but because Xiao Han walked straight past him without stopping to the table — and picked up the thermos of chicken soup he had left behind.
Realising that he had overly flattered himself, all colour drained from Zhuo Fan’s face in an instant.
Xiao Han took the thermos to the door and suddenly turned around, smiling at Zhuo Fan. “Fuck your dead heart. Goodbye.”
The door was closed again. This time, Xiao Han came out fresh and relaxed. He no longer had to endure all this pain in his balls. Although he did not know what was the result of tampering with the script, it was impossible for him to turn the other cheek and get hit again after it had happened once.
He drove away from the hospital. The sunshine outside was as bright as his mood.
Just as Xiao Han was thinking about how his life would go on in the future, no longer arranged according to the script, a truck rushed towards him —
Everything happened so fast that Xiao Han only had time to leave his last words in this world.
Only two words: heh heh.