Chapter 41

***

“…”

“I’m just worried about you, Cassia.”

His voice was cautious.

“I really don’t want you to be hurt again. So, if you want to learn painting, there’s a way to learn it here…”

“Michael.”

When she called him, he stopped talking. 

“I’m fine. I’ve already thought about it a lot before I decided.”

“…But Cassia-”

“If I want to learn how to draw, I can also learn here. But you know that the infrastructure to learn something properly is well established in the capital. In order to meet and learn from good teachers, and learn how to make good paintings, I will have to go to the capital one day.”

As long as she decided to start painting in earnest, her final destination was as good as decided.

Le Mans, the cultural centre of the Fontrich Empire.

As long as she has decided to learn painting, she will have to go there someday.

“You know, I’m the type to do it right once I do it.”

Michael just looked at Cassie as she continued.

“I know it all, too. As for the things you worry about.”

Cassia was a cautious person. Just as much as Michael cared about her.

It’s not that she didn’t expect what would happen to her if she went up to the capital to learn painting.

But even in anticipation of all that, she had a strong desire to learn painting.

It was similar to when Diana entered the Duke’s mansion without hesitation.

The crucial decisions in her life that she must make, even if she needs to put everything aside.

The present decision was one of them.

“Seven years ago, you stopped me from becoming the Duchess after Diana, Michael.”

“…”

“But seven years later, as you can see, I’m doing very well.”

‘I know it won’t be as easy as I thought to learn painting in the capital. Maybe I’ll be unhappy again.’

But in the end, she believed that happiness would eventually come to you someday. She truly believed it.

“So make sure I get to the capital safely, Michael.”

“…”

At Cassia’s words, Michael looked at her for a while. At one point, he shook his head.

“I really can’t stop you.”

“…Can I go to the capital comfortably?”

“I will always respect your choices, Cassia.”

He smiled and nodded his head.

“Everything is for you. How can I hold you from leaving for what you want to do? Still, the only reason I hold onto you is because of my greed. Because there is something uncomfortable in every corner of my heart to let you go. That’s why…”

“Thank you, Michael.”

Cassia looked at him warmly.

Come to think of it, he was the only one who always cried and agonized for her in important decisions in life.

He did when she became the Duchess, and still is when she’s leaving for the capital now.

When she thought about it, she could feel the warmth of his eyes on her, just like she felt during her entire stay here.

“And I have something to say.”

“What?”

Cassia looked at him softly.

The moment she encountered Michael’s gaze looking back on her, she smiled at her feelings for him.

As if she had the courage to leave for the capital, she thought it might be a good idea to show courage for something else, too.

“I will come back to this place after learning how to draw as much as possible. A quiet place puts my mind at ease. When that day comes…”

In the past, she was a young girl. Not anymore.

“I think I can take your feelings a little more seriously.”

Cassia took a small present from her arms. Opening the small box revealed two rings. It was plain and without decoration, and it looked like an ordinary accessory.

“It’s a gift of promise.”

Michael’s eyelashes fluttered.

* * *

There was a silence. Michael’s eyes, which looked at Cassia with trembling eyes, turned to the ring.

It was neither decorated nor colourful to be a couple’s ring, but the fact that it was a ring did not change.

“What is this…?”

Michael was speechless.

He seemed to be more shocked than Cassia had expected.

For a while, the silence continued.

She could feel the atmosphere flowing between them rapidly sinking.

It was strange.

Thump, thump, her heart kept pounding.

Maybe it’s because she was nervous about the present she had prepared with great determination.

She never thought he would say no.

‘…What if he refuses?’

He was looking at her without moving. It was a time when she was a little timid and tried to avoid his gaze.

Michael’s large hand wrapped around her face. A soft, warm sensation sank onto her lips.

“…!”

Cassia opened her eyes in surprise. His face was in right front of hers. Slightly bumping his lips and pulling them off, he said.

“You’re really…”

Cassia met his eyes. 

She will never forget the look in his eyes.

“I love you, Cassia.”

“…”

“I love you.”

He confessed to her just like that. It seems that there were only these words that could be said at that moment.

Then his lips came again. The intense kiss began to engulf the two deeply.

Cassia closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his neck. Their warm breaths came and went. 

Her heart was beating like an explosion. Her whole body warmed up in an instant.

The moment they confirmed each other’s feelings.

They never rejected each other. 

There was no reason for that either.

* * *

Even in the deep night, the quiet stillness was comfortable.

Facing their gazes, Michael spoke in a trembling tone, as if he was finally speaking after a long time.

Only Michael’s voice echoed in the quiet silence.

“Before, I thought you hated me.”

“…”

“Actually, I really wanted to get to know you, really wanted to be close to you, but I forced myself to suppress my feelings. I didn’t want to trouble you.”

Cassia listened quietly to him.

“Since you entered the Duke’s mansion, my mind had been confused. All mixed up. Shortly after Diana left, the atmosphere in the house became very bad, too. I went on a trip like I was running away. I met a lot of people along the way. That’s how my experience with people made me realize things I didn’t know before.”

“What exactly?”

“That maybe you were interested in me, too.”

There are times when things that passed by without knowing anything at that time, strongly reveal the truth over time.

“It was just a moment when I was eating alone one day.”

“…”

“Your eyes. Your gaze. The way you used to talk to me. As I held up my spoon, everything came to my mind in a flash, and I belatedly came up with an insight.”

Michael continued.

“When I was a child, I had no idea what those signals you sent me were talking about.”

He thought she didn’t like him, so he just walked away. He pushed himself away and eventually just gave up.

“How much… I regretted it.”

Michael chuckled.

“That’s how I spent my time. It’s been years of regret. The day I ran into you at the villa after a long time, you asked me how I was doing. Actually, it was more of a misfortune than happiness. I couldn’t stand it because I felt like an idiot at that time.”

If he had been a little more tactful, he wouldn’t have had to let her go that way.

If he had had a little more courage, she wouldn’t have entered the Duke’s place like that.

“If we had known each other’s feelings earlier, I think this situation would have been a little different. Even though I knew it was meaningless, I kept looking back and assuming it.”

“…Michael.”

She was so busy with her work that she forgot about Michael. During her struggling life as a Duchess, Michael was also fighting a lonely battle of his own.

Cassia stretched out her arms. She hugged and stroked his hair dearly.

At her touch, Michael took a deep breath, burying his face in her chest. 

“Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

“…”

‘What can I tell him?’ After much thought, she continued.

“Michael, you know what? I don’t really believe in God, but I think there is such a thing as destiny.”

For example, the meeting between Diana and Cassia, or the thought of learning painting.

“Even between people. We don’t know if we were destined to meet only now after turning around, right?”

“…”

Michael didn’t answer. 

He just listened to Cassia. 

She smiled bitterly.

“You’re right. I used to like you when I was very young.”

“…”

“But you seemed so far away to me. The Count of Allison has always been a bright person.”

“You were so close with Diana, but it was difficult in case of me?”

Michael pouted his lips. It was so cute that Cassia laughed out loud.

“Yeah. It was hard to get close to you for some reason. It seemed like it was a sin to even get caught liking you.”

She loved Diana. But she was just a friend.

Watching Diana didn’t make her heart beat like it was going to explode. Your heart thumps, and your face turns red.

But it only happened with Michael. There was a time when her body and mind reacted completely towards Michael.

His laughter, the kindness he showed. 

His smile. 

Everything he did to her made her heart rise high and fall to the lowest several times a day.

At that age, she didn’t know what love was. 

Embarrassing emotions evoked a strange sense of guilt.

“Maybe I had low self-esteem. I didn’t even know what love between the opposite gender was. I kept avoiding you, and I was busy running away.”

“…”

“Obviously, Michael, I didn’t have the courage either. Just like you regretted it.”

Anyway, everything is a thing of the past.

Neither Michael nor Cassia knew at that time, and they didn’t know each other very well. Both of them didn’t have the courage.

That’s how it passed. She had become a person who knows what it’s like to be old and tired compared to then.

Cassia smiled as softly as possible toward Michael.

“When I come back, no, from now on. I’ll try harder.”

“…Thank you.”

Michael smiled at Cassia as if it was enough.

That’s how their last night together passed.

***