Chapter 187 - 186

"How did it happen?" Philip asked, wanting to know and Mika looked at him, a sad smile on his face.

"Does it really matter? The result still remains the same." The red haired wolf said and he intended to leave but Philip stopped him, grabbing his wrist. 

"You need to talk to me, we need to talk about this. You owe it to me after everything that you did. Mika, if you walk away right now, you and I, we will never have the chance to fix things. Philip said and heard his friend sigh, his face falling. He remained silent and for a second he wondered if he was actually going to speak. Mika though parted his lips and while almost whispering he told Philip everything. 

"I met her the same night I turned twenty. I was so desperate to meet her that my instincts simply took over, leading me to the forest just outside the village I used to live in. She was there, laid on the ground and wounded, bathed by the moonlight. She turned her head and looked at me, hissing at me the way those bloodsuckers do and I froze. She was the enemy, the one that I was supposed to stay away from but right there, under that moonlight in this silence that spread everywhere all I could think of was that I had never seen anyone more beautiful. I moved towards her, inspected her wounds and made her come with me. I helped her, I kept her alive, hiding her from the sun, you see she wasn't like your Kai, she was weak and a nobody, her life was a mess. She didn't seem to hate me, even though I was her mate, maybe because I saved her life. I never really thought about it too much. She was silent though, she barely spoke and didn't  even look me in the eyes most of the time. I believed she didn't like being saved by someone like me. I was a werewolf and on top of that I was also poor, the combination was ridiculous you see." he told Philip, a scoff escaping his lips. His friend could see it, how hard it was for him to recall those memories, how it pained him but he kept going. "After a month, maybe she started to open up to me. You know how I usually act like a jerk. Well, I've never had the urge to be nice to a person before. You wouldn't believe your eyes, how careful I was around her, how…how much I tried to make her like me, not even love me because that, I did believe it was impossible. She told me her story, why she had been hurt. She lived in the town just after the end of the forest, a maid to some pureblood who had decided to leave BloodBound and the son of that royal seemed to want her, but she didn't. He had tried to force her and she tried to escape. The spoiled brat beat her, injured her enough so her blood wouldn't be on his hands immediately and threw her into the forest, leaving her there to die. She was so silent…" Mika mumbled, getting lost in his own thoughts for a moment. "And she was barely able to smile. I did everything. I tried so hard…but well, she couldn't love me, now that I think about it she couldn't love anyone back, she had been used, thrown away, how could she trust someone and let go? Still I let her stay with me, I gave her my bed, I bought her dresses and then she smiled once you know, somehow it made me feel that everything that I did wasn't in vain, because she had smiled at me. Elise, that was her name. We lived for a while like that and every day I was getting more used to the idea that she would never return my feelings until one day while we were eating she looked me dead in the eye and told me…you love me don't you? I thought she would leave me then, I was so scared but still I nodded unable to say anything. Good, she had answered me, because I love you too. And that was it, the first and the last time I heard her say something like that to me. Because soon after she was killed. The son of the pureblood had men looking for her, I didn't know, he wanted to kill her after all, why would he search for her? One day while I was at work they came to our home, grabbed her and ripped her heart out. When I came back I found her there, dead, on my floor. And just like that it was over."

"Mika, I…I am sorry that this happened to you." Philip said. 

"Philip, I was worried about you. Not because you were mated with a vampire, it happens to more werewolves than you think but because that vampire was Kai. A pureblood, a man who would definitely carry something dark with him, just like Elise did. When Vampires are killed, they die, forever, they are gone. The same way Earl Hampton had Elisa killed, the same way someone would go after your mate because of who they were, because of who in your case they are with, that's the reason why I wanted you to be away from them, because it is better to know that they are alive and away than have nightmares of their dead body every night." he explained.

"If you had the chance would you not meet Elise? If you knew things were going to end up the way they did would you have stayed away from her?" Philip asked the sad vampire. "Because I can't, I can't leave Kai, knowing he is alive is not enough for me anymore. I want to be with him, I want to fix things, I want our time back and Mika I, I will get it." he stated, looking at him in the eyes and receiving a bitter smile as an answer.

"Well, at least yours is alive, you can think about it." he told him. "I will get back now."

"Mika." Philip called out, stopping him once more. "I don't know if I will ever be able to forgive you for what you did but I am sorry about what happened to you." he said and the red haired man nodded. 

"Good luck."