Chapter 67 - 67 - Realisation

Fang wasn't faring much better than Ren, either. He went to school, attended the sessions with his psychiatrist and his therapist and accompanied the three furballs at home. He missed Ren so much that it was like a physical ache gnawing away at him.

Deep down, Fang held on to the hope that Ren would come back to cajole him...and then he would apologise properly to Ren and...maybe things would be all right again.

However, even after two weeks, there was no sign of either Ren or Pax. Fang finally couldn't take it anymore and asked Wolf where Ren was.

"He left," Wolf said.

Fang's heart dropped. "Left? When? Where did he go?"

Wolf shrugged. "Does it matter?" he asked, arching an eyebrow.

Fang bit his lip. "I...is he ok? Is Pax with him?"

Wolf shook his head. "Pax is already back at Sirocco," he replied.

Fang went pale. "Ren...when is he coming back?" he asked in a whisper.

Wolf shrugged again. "I don't think he has any plans to return," he said. "Isn't that good for you? There won't be any disturbance in your studies and your psyche."

Fang felt his knees buckle. "He's...he's not coming back...? He...left me?"

Wolf frowned. "Wasn't that what you wanted?" he asked. "You wanted to separate, right?"

Fang hung his head and remained silent. Where had Ren gone? Was he ok? Would he get over Fang and find someone else... someone more suited to him? Someone who would make him happy...?

The thought of Ren laughing in someone else's arms...of loving someone else...

Fang couldn't bear it. His heart felt like broken shards of glass.

But if it was good for Ren...

"Did he remove the reflection magic...?" Fang asked Wolf.

"Does it matter?" Wolf asked quietly.

"Of course it matters! Won't Ren be in danger as long as this reflection magic is on me?!" Fang cried softly.

Wolf shrugged. "Will its presence or absence affect your decision? Or would you want to get Ren back based on whether the reflection magic exists or not?"

Fang frowned. "Why are you asking me this?"

Wolf's eyes glowed like a predator. "Because that's the most important point here. Your decision. Your choice independent of other factors. Your consent."

Fang stared at him blankly.

Wolf sighed. "If you force yourself to be with Ren simply because he did something for you...then... isn't that against your wishes? If Ren insists on maintaining his relationship with you without your consent, how is he different from the other bastards in your past?" he asked bluntly.

Before Fang knew it, his hand moved on its own to slap Wolf.

Wolf wasn't Fang's master for nothing. He caught Fang's arm swiftly.

"What? Is it painful to hear that?" Wolf asked quietly.

Fang's eyes were red with rage. "Ren is NOTHING like those people!" he shouted. "When has Ren not respected my opinion? When has Ren ever forced me to do anything?!"

Wolf smiled slightly. "Then, does it matter if the reflection magic stays on you or not?" he asked.

"Of course it matters!" Fang yelled. "It's dangerous! What if Ren gets hurt again?!"

"But... didn't you say that you wanted to break up with Ren because you didn't want to hurt him? From that point of view, isn't your decision about the break up directly based on whether the reflection magic is removed or not?" Wolf pressed.

Fang fell silent.

"If I tell you that the reflection magic is gone, what will you do?" Wolf asked.

"I...I don't know," Fang murmured.

"And what will you do if I tell you that it's still there?" Wolf asked.

"I'll find Ren and ask him to remove it," Fang said firmly.

"And if I told you that the only way to remove the reflection magic is to obliterate the caster's soul...what will you do?" Wolf continued.

Fang stared at him in horror. Obliterating Ren's soul? Never!

Wolf didn't spare him. "Or, if I told you that removal of the reflection magic would result in Ren's memories of you and your relationship being permanently deleted from his mind...what would you do then, Fang?" he demanded.

Fang was rendered speechless. Could he bear it if Ren forgot all about him?

Wolf shook his head ruefully. "In the end, Fang - if you put aside all these things about the reflection magic and who hurt whom and who did what for whom and who'll be better off without the other - if you had nothing else to consider except Ren himself...what would you choose? Would you still love Ren? Would you still want to spend your life with him?"

Fang nodded tearfully. "More than anything else in the world..." he whispered.

"Then why on earth are you getting all tangled up in the random issues?" Wolf asked pointedly. "Ultimately, isn't it a simple question of whether you love Ren or not, and whether your love is reciprocated? Why should anything else affect your decision?"

Fang's jaw dropped open in shock. Wolf was right, he thought, berating himself mentally. If only he had realised this one fact earlier...as long as he loved Ren and Ren loved him... couldn't they solve everything else together?

Seeing realisation finally dawn on Fang, Wolf smiled slightly. Hopefully, these two idiots would be able to make amends to each other now.

"Is that why Ren left...?" Fang asked softly. "Because he thought that I was forcing myself to be with him...?" Knowing Ren as he did, he knew that it was quite possibly the most likely explanation.

Wolf shrugged. "Partly," he replied.

"The reflection magic...it really is permanent...?" Fang asked hesitantly, although in his heart, he knew that it was true.

Wolf narrowed his eyes.

"It's not because it'll affect my decision!" Fang said quickly. "I love Ren, and I'm going to win his heart back!" he announced. "But...I...I just want to understand why Ren lost his temper like that..."

Wolf sighed and told him the truth.