Chapter 11.1

Note : I’m really sorry I disappeared like that without giving any news. I had my final exams starting, I had to work TT_TT

I have midterms the whole month of May, so I might not publish at the same pace until then… I hope you’ll have the patience 

Time passed and Philomel turned ten. She was spending time with Nassar, who was visiting her as usual. Suddenly, the little boy asked her.

« Your Highness, do you hate me? «

Philomel looked up from her book and looked at Nassar, sitting opposite her, with surprise.

« What? There’s no way. That’s not true. »

« ………Did you happen to overhear my conversation with my father that day? »

The day Nassar had visited her with his father, the same day Philomel had decided not to be attached to him anymore. The day she had made up her mind. Philomel remained silent, Nassar straightened up before putting one knee on the ground, his head down.

« I apologize. »

« Nassar! Get up! »

Philomel was surprised by the gesture and reached out her hand.

« No, I will beg for your forgiveness until her Highness feels relieved. »

Nassar refused to straighten his head. Philomel said to him cautiously.

« You don’t have to beg my forgiveness, Nassar. It’s okay, because you didn’t swear behind my back, you didn’t speak in order for me to listen. I just overheard it.

« …… It’s a problem in itself to have a heart like that. »

‘It’s going to be difficult.’

It wasn’t like Philomel hated Nassar. Of course she’d resented him for a while. After a while, however, the resentment had dissipated.

« What can I do? Even if they are my feelings, I can’t control them.

Philomel thought about it sincerely. Nassar’s love was not something she could get even if she longed for it, it was not Nassar’s fault that he could not love her. But Nassar still wasn’t getting up.

« I even have to watch my feelings. So it falls to my responsibility to have had this bad feeling. »

Philomel felt compassion for Nassar.

‘How much did the duke bother him for him to act like that?’

The Duke of Avriden was famous for the hard education he gave to his son. Classes in history, etiquette, and swordplay. The duke seemed to be warming up to Nassar to make sure that he acquired as much knowledge as possible and that he could do whatever was asked of him.  Philomel was beginning to understand a little of Nassar’s suffering, since she had begun to take the succession classes herself. Nassar’s shoulders, which shook before her, seemed so small. The crying little boy begged.

« If there is something you don’t like, please tell me. After all, I was born to serve you. If you let me know, I will fix it. »

Philomel shouted

« Why should Nassar be born to serve me? Nassar belongs to himself! »

« But my father says I must always serve Her Highness with that in mind. »

Perhaps the little boy had been trained to meet all of Philomel’s needs. That was the level of brainwashing he had undergone.

‘The Duke! What have you done to your son?’

Philomel grasped his forehead.

‘If he gets attached to me like that, and later finds out I’m a fake princess, he’ll blame me for nothing!’

Besides, Nassar could not continue to think this way.

« Nassar, sit down. »

When Philomel spoke firmly, the boy, who looked dead inside, obeyed softly;

« Repeat after me. »

« What? »

« Follow what I am going to say now. »

« Yes, your Highness. »

« I am a valuable person. »

Nassar hesitated for a moment before repeating timidly.

« …..I am a precious person. »

« I was not born to serve anyone. »

« ….I was not born to serve anyone. »

« I will live as I please. »

« I belong to myself… »

The young boy’s voice began to break out after a moment’s hesitation.

« I will live as I please. »

The boy’s voice exploded at his words. He was, indeed, the Duke’s successor and would dust, Ellencia, but Philomel wished he could live his life.

« It was good. Now let’s keep it that way! »

« Yes! »

So Philomel began her own brainwashing for a while, she hoped it would work. Then it was time for Nassar to go home.

« I’ll be going, then. »

The young boy hesitated to say goodbye. He didn’t seem to want to go. What if when he got home, the new brainwashing didn’t work anymore? Feeling sorry for Nassar, who looked like a little puppy abandoned in the rain, Philomel told him.

« Nassar. Let’s have dinner tonight. »

« …. Can I? »

« Of course. I’ll tell the Duke as well. And Nassar? »

« Yes. »

« In the future, if the Duke tells you the opposite of everything I just told you….ignore it. »

« …..I will do my best »

« If you think you are going to do something ridiculous, tell me. I’ll scold you. »

Nassar had a small laugh as if he thought it was a joke.

« I’m not joking. I can scold a real peacock. »

At least as long as the Duke recognized Philomel as the princess. That day, Nassar returned home after a short discussion with Philomel after dinner. He shyly confided to the princess that he wanted to be a warrior when he grew up, not a duke.  There was no way the duke would let his only heir go off to the battlefields to fight monsters, but Philomel cheered him on.

This was the first time Philomel had the opportunity to learn a little more about the little boy « Nassar », not the male lead of the romance, not the heir to the dukedom of Abriden.

‘Yeah, that’s enough.’ the princess thought as she looked at Nassar who waved his hand. There was no need to be closer to Nassar than necessary, or even to get along with him.

« I’ll just leave things as they are. »

Everything was peaceful.

That night, when Nassar returned, Philomel grabbed the book <Princess Ellencia> and walked over to the fireplace, in which a fire was burning.

« I have memorized all the contents…. »

Philomel had read, over and over again this book. Just in case, the important contents had been changed with a password, hidden in a separate place. Not just in one place, but all over. There was no need to have the book <Princess Ellencia> anymore. It was time to destroy the evidence. It was too dangerous to keep this book in her possession. Even the maid who cleaned the room had never suspected that the book existed, but there was no law in the future.

« Aisch! »

Philomel hesitated as she looked alternately at the fire and the book, then closed her eyes before throwing it into the crackling fire. In a short time the cover of the book turned brown from the heat, the pages ignited and turned to ash. But, something inconceivable happened at that moment: there was a light that shone until in front of the chimney, the book <The Princess Ellencia> reappeared. There was no trace of scorch on it. Philomel was so surprised, that she just stared with a blank expression at the book on the floor.