Chapter 87 - Weird Dream

Ned and I continued talking for a little while longer under the night sky.

Sometimes we would be serious, sometimes it would be a joke, and sometimes it would just be something random, with no particular reason.

Ned sighed. He was sitting on the ground next to me with his hands wrapped around his legs.

"Hey, Jay?"

My body was in the same position as his, hugging my knees to my chest. My head slowly turned over to him.

"Yeah?"

Ned smiled bitterly.

"Thanks for staying with me. Even when all I did was ramble on about random things."

A chuckle escaped me.

"You don't have to thank me for that. It was quite enjoyable, in fact."

Ned laughed.

"Mm... I enjoyed it too."

Silence descended upon us for a few moments.

The moon hung up high in the sky. Ned looked up at it and licked his dry lips.

"Normally... I feel really lonely, you know?"

He scoffed at himself.

"Well, you probably don't know."

A soft laugh escaped me.

"Yeah..."

Ned shook his head.

"Anyways, I guess I just wanted to say..."

He pressed his lips together.

"I feel a lot less lonely around you, Jay."

A small smile emerged on my face.

"Haha, I imagine it is a lot less lonely when there is a person next to you."

Ned shook his head again.

"No... I don't really mean it like that."

My hand scratched the back of my head.

"Eh? Then what do you mean?"

Ned chuckled bitterly.

"Have you ever been surrounded by people, yet feel like you were alone?"

My eyes closed.

...Well.

Ever since I first realized I would appear back at the start each time I died...

I've always felt like I was alone.

I've met so many people, heard their stories, and overcame obstacles that I thought were insurmountable.

...But nobody remembers.

If I call out their name amicably, they would probably look at me with confusion, wondering how I found out their name.

My lips parted ever so slightly, to let out a weak voice.

"Yeah... I've felt like that before."

Ned laughed.

"Do you see what I'm saying now?"

My eyes blinked a few times.

"I... think so?"

Ned sighed with a soft smile on his face.

"I guess you're really going to make me come out and say it."

An awkward laugh seeped out from my lips.

"Sorry, sorry."

Ned leaned back until his head rested comfortably on a tree.

"It's because I feel like I can be real with you. There is no need to hide any of my thoughts."

My hand gently scratched the back of my head.

"...Why do you have to hide your thoughts?"

Ned smirked.

"Because people don't like that sort of thing. They don't want to be bothered with how you really are as a person."

He laughed with a sad undertone.

"Only if you pretend to be a better person and hit all the social cues, will you ever get friends."

Ned laid his forehead down on his knees.

"Then... if you accidentally open up, they leave."

My body shuddered.

"Ah... That sounds like more trouble than it's worth."

Ned chuckled.

"It really is. That's why meeting someone like you feels kinda nice, you know?"

An awkward smile emerged on my face.

"You make me sound really special or something."

Ned rolled his eyes.

"That's because you essentially are. What kind of person doesn't want talent, gets his wish fulfilled, then works super hard anyway?"

My hand scratched the back of my head.

"Haha, when you put it like that, you have a point."

My shoulders shrugged.

"I guess I never really saw myself as a person that was... all that good."

Ned sighed.

"Well... that's pretty normal. People always have good things about them that they will never realize."

His voice abruptly became soft.

"...and bad things."

I slowly nodded.

"...Anyways. We really have stayed for way too long."

Ned smiled.

"Haha, do you think we will get in trouble? I mean, they aren't our parents, right?"

A smile spread out on my face as my head shook.

"Regardless, we shouldn't be doing this. I imagine it's bad for our health."

Ned waved his hand dismissively.

"Agh, stop it. That sounds like something Alyx would say."

My eyes rolled.

"And something Alyx would say is probably in our best interest."

Ned pressed his lips together.

"Well... I'm not denying that."

With a sigh, I got up on my feet. My legs felt a little numb, but it didn't take too long for the sensation to come back to me.

Ned stood up as well.

"You really don't want to talk a little more?"

An exasperated smile appeared on my face.

"Come on, I didn't say we would never talk again. There's still tomorrow, no?"

Ned rubbed his hand against his chin. There was a cheeky smile on his face.

"What about the day after that?"

My mind recalled that winter was coming soon. Though I wanted to promise Ned, there simply were too many circumstances.

"Let's see if everything works out. If it does, then it won't be a problem."

Ned laughed.

"Fair enough, fair enough."

We walked together, back into the palace, then up the stairs. We reached our rooms in the blink of an eye.

Ned yawned. After he finished, he ended up laughing.

"Honestly, you probably made the best decision. If I stayed there any longer I might've just fallen asleep right there."

My shoulders shrugged.

"Haha, it's not too different for me either."

My mind was a bit muddled. We really did stay up for too long.

Ned waved to me. He could hardly keep his eyes open as he did so.

"Bye Jay."

My eyes were starting to give up on me as well. However, I was still able to get a wave off.

"Bye Ned."

With that, the two of us entered our rooms.

My legs stumbled until they reached the bed. If I was a little more unlucky, I would've fallen over.

There was a loud thump from the room next to me.

It seemed Ned suffered a more unfortunate fate.

My face essentially slammed into the bed.

And that was how I fell asleep.

...

My mind formulated a dream.

A weird one.

My body was suspended in space. There were a few stars my eyes could just barely make out.

But they were so far away.

So fleeting.

It was a strange feeling, to say the least. The loss of gravity was probably responsible for that. The sudden loss of that sensation created a strange dichotomy in my brain.

Like there was no longer anything tying down my existence.

There wasn't much to do. My eyes surveyed the various stars for a few moments, but after a while, it felt a little pointless.

It was a little cold, but not enough to make me fear for my life. It was just uncomfortable. 

Though, maybe just being uncomfortable was worse.

Like that, I was left to my own devices for what felt like hours.

...This dream is...

...really boring.

Why couldn't my mind think of something more fun?

I guess this is what my mind wanted me to dream about.

My eyes closed, simply letting the time pass by. At some point, my ears caught a humming sound. It was hardly noticeable at first but steadily got louder.

My brows furrowed.

It was starting to get annoying.

My eyes opened, looking at where this strange humming sound was coming from.

That was when I saw... some white lines?

They appeared small, but they were slowly getting bigger.

...No, they weren't getting bigger. They were getting closer, and really quickly too.

They gradually revealed their magnificence, through their size alone.

A few white lines streaked past me. My eyes looked to my sides, to see these glowing lines.

When my eyes followed their source, they appeared to stretch on infinitely.

In just a few more moments, the space was filled with countless more white lines. They passed by in a flash, making the empty space feel chaotic.

It did not take long for the white lines to fill the space. If my eyes tried to survey the area, they would find more white from the lines than black from space.

My head slowly shifted back to the source of the lines.

That was when I noticed one was approaching me.

Before my mind even had time to fully understand my situation...

The white line pierced me.

It was painful, so painful.

Yet, more than pain I was scared. For some reason, my existence felt like it was slipping away from me, leaving my grasp.

My mind panicked, trying to do everything it could to hold myself together.

But then...

My resistance faltered.

Not because my mind didn't want to, but that it couldn't.

Then, my body disintegrated to dust.

My eyes flew open.

My breathing was still steady, but...

My body laid there, perhaps in shock.

"....Weird dream."