Chapter 185 - That Look

The black figure let a faint humming sound, then stated what had happened.

"Well, we first woke up in a stupor, thinking that Mildred had saved us, but it was actually us going back in time. After that, we decided to stay with the group. Later on, we saw Ned with... that little girl out on the balcony. Then, we went to magic school and found that there we had no talent then..."

He continued to narrate until he reached the time I died. Honestly, it made me feel a bit of melancholy. I hadn't really thought about my past until now.

Noah's face was twitching.

"Wait... you guys can come back from the dead?"

I tilted my head to the side.

"Uh... something like that yeah."

Amy furrowed her brows.

"That... that sounds really unfair."

The black figure shrugged its shoulders.

"Well, we didn't really want this type of power."

Noah's eyes widened.

"But why? You can go fix all of your mistakes! Not to mention to live with all your loved ones!"

I narrowed my eyes.

"But the problem is that they aren't the same people. In the end, I'm always meeting them for the first time, when I'm used to being so familiar. It hurts."

Amy held her child a little closer.

"It... does?"

I shook my head.

"Nevermind, it's my turn to recount the events."

It took a little while, but I was able to remember and retell the events. Afterwards, the black figure would do the same.

After going back and forth so many times, we had essentially gone through everything. From my suicide attempt, to Mildred helping me. Our times at the magic school, and surviving out in the winter.

Meeting Leon for the first time, and climbing out of that canyon

From killing the lizard king to learning spells.

And... killing people.

By the end, there was a moment of silence between us. Honestly, it seemed a little hard to believe that I went through so much. Thinking back on it makes me wonder if I could really do it all again.

However, before I could think about that any more, a different thought popped into my head.

What happened to... 'that' side of me?

The one that was essentially insane.

I turned to the black figure.

"Do you have any other memories? From even before?"

The black figure paused before shaking its head.

"Um, I don't think so."

I scratched the back of my head.

"Then what happened to that part of us?"

The black figure stared at me blankly.

"What are you talking about?"

I furrowed my brows.

"You know... the one that wants to kill a lot."

The black figure stared at me strangely.

"I have no idea what you are talking about. We only killed because we were forced to do so."

I raised an eyebrow.

"Wait. You don't remember any of those visions?"

The black figure seemed to get agitated.

"Are you just pretending to know something that I don't? That doesn't make you the superior version, alright!"

I raised up my hands as though to surrender.

"That's not what I meant!"

The black figure was holding onto the side of its head.

"...You don't have to lie."

Though I felt that statement was a bit unwarranted considering that I wasn't lying, it was probably best to drop the subject. Honestly, up until this point, I had more or less accepted that the black figure was essentially me. However, it still looked like there were some differences.

As for why those differences occurred, I'm not exactly sure.

Noah let out a faint gasp.

"You seem to have gone through a lot."

I nodded.

"From what I read of your diary, it seems like you have as well."

Noah sighed.

"Honestly, I can't really remember most of those days anymore. But maybe that's for the best."

I looked at the souls wandering around casually in the area around us.

"Anyway, should we try and harvest some of these souls? Maybe we can do something with them."

Noah nodded.

"Maybe they can be used to repair my body."

Though I originally believed it was going to be easy to do this, the black figure spoke up.

"What? We can't do that! They are probably all human souls."

I blinked a few times.

"Well, yeah. I mean we just killed one earlier, right?"

The black figure shook his head.

"No, but that was out of necessity. This isn't!"

I furrowed my brows.

"But how are we supposed to find out what we can do with them without harvesting them?"

The black figure looked at me strangely.

"Why do we have to find out in the first place? We can just leave them alone."

Amy looked between the two of us.

"The souls of those people aren't us. We don't even know who they are. Why does it matter so much to you?"

The black figure began breathing heavily.

"What? How could you look at someone's life like that?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"How about you just stay here and not harvest any souls, while I go out to do it on my own?"

The black figure took a step forward.

"How does that change a single thing? People are still dying!"

Noah raised a finger.

"Well, souls."

The black figure began yelling.

"How does that matter!"

I rubbed my chin.

...Was this the type of person I was before? For some reason, it feels a little foreign to me.

Amy pouted.

"You really are making it a bigger deal than it has to be."

The black figure's head tilted to the side.

"Wait..."

I blinked a few times.

"Um... what?"

The black figure's tone dropped several times over.

"You are just like that little girl. Why didn't I see the similarities earlier?"

I furrowed my brows.

"What? You have to be kidding me."

The black figure pointed at me.

"The same face. You both have that same look."

I held up a hand.

"Hold up. You are saying I have the same face as a little girl, despite being a guy."

The black figure simply looked at me.

"It's the look of someone that has gotten so used to killing, that they see it as a normal occurrence."

If I was drinking water, I would have spat it all out.

"How can you even tell something so specific from a-"

The black figure lunged towards me, not willing to listen. The black dragon head on his arm immediately expanded several times over, quickly reaching me.

By instinct, I teleported away.

Upon reappearing I sighed.

"Hey, you're just jumping to conclusions. Are you not even willing to listen?"

The black figure clicked its tongue.

"I am not willing to listen to you."

Noah scratched his beard.

"I am very confused."

Amy nodded.

"So am I."

As for the child, it raised a hand and let out a cry of agreement.

Without waiting for me to respond, the black figure disappeared. I instinctively knew what was happening, thus stepped to the side. Right as I did so, the black figure appeared next to me, holding its wooden stake out.

I looked at it.

"If you try that one more time, I'm going to start fighting back."

A long set of vines made of black ash burst from the black figure's hand.

"Then fight back."

It swung the set of vines towards me, but because they weren't too thick, I was able to bend back, letting it pass just over me. The corner of my eyebrow twitched.

"I will then."

The dragon head on my arm expanded and shot out, trying to swallow the black figure whole. However, it disappeared before the dragon head could snap down.

The black figure reappeared several meters away.

I cast the elementary wind spell, dash, in order to boost my speed. Then, I ran forth. The set of vines around the black figure's hand rapidly expanded, but that was also the hand it used to hold the wooden stake, so it could use that anymore.

Seeing my approach, the black figure swung the giant set of vines towards me. This time, it wasn't going to be so easy to dodge. So I decided to teleport.

I attempted to pierce through the black figure's heart with my wooden stake, but by the time I reappeared, the black figure also appeared to the side.

I couldn't help but sigh.

"So this is how it's like to fight against me, huh? Annoying."

The black figure scoffed.

"We are different people."

In response, I teleported towards it once more, but didn't try to attack this time. The black figure had already moved as expected, but I immediately tossed a firebolt into its direction.

In response, the black figure simply swiped with its large vine arm, causing it to explode on the vines harmlessly.

A smile began creeping up on my face.

"Not making it easy, huh?"

The black figure yelled.

"I knew it! You must be the little girl!"