20 Chapter two, 2016, buddying emotions: 7

'Why? Why did I hurt him that way? It's not his fault that I'm interested in Hamarugen-san.'

Shame ran through her veins.

And anger.

She ripped the hateful letter to pieces and threw it away. Then she changed back to her indoor shoes.

Of course even the tall geek had a crush on Kuri-chan. He was male after all. Well she wouldn't be alone feeling hurt. Ryu-kun's midget sister had fallen hard as well.

'She's worse off than me,' Kyoko thought. 'Far worse. I'm really only interested in the guy. OK, and angry with him being the same as the rest.'

"He's more your type," Kuri-chan had said. Well, that opportunity was in flames now. Kyoko had poured petrol over it, struck fire on the matches and set it ablaze. And then she had added dynamite to it all just for good measure. 'Aww, I won't even be able to apologize to him for at least half a year after this. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!'

And he had been kind of cute.

'Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!'

And very polite.

'Moron! Moron! Moron!'

And after she had mauled him his first thought had been to help his friend.

'I hate myself!'

And even though she had seen his shoulders shake when she went indoors, he had still stood by the bikes to give her time to get away alone.

'Kyoko, Kyoko, Kyoko, how often do you think you'll meet a guy like that?'

She climbed the stairs to 3:1, and when she told her friends about the confession, with Hamarugen-san's part carefully censored out, they helped her understand the sheer extent of her epic stupidity. As if she needed help rubbing it in.

At least she hadn't helped Hamarugen-san confess to Kuri-chan. The lazy coward could do that in person if he deemed it important enough.

But Kuri-chan saw right through her as if she was made of glass. For the second time in one single lunch break she was called out. And this time by her best friend.

"What happened?" Kuri-chan asked her after she had dragged her to the stairwell between second and third floor.

"Told you."

"Ko-chan!"

Kyoko found her own feet infinitely interesting to study. "I rejected him. Badly," she added when shame overtook her once again.

"There's no way you'd behave that way even if he looked like an ogre. Did he do something bad to you?"

And that was when Kyoko broke down. Her legs lost their function and she sank down on her knees.

"I'll kill him!" Kuri-chan said, misunderstanding why Kyoko had collapsed.

"No, no please don't!"

Kuri-chan sat down and looked at her. "No?"

Kyoko spent some time pulling at her skirt hem. "I hurt him. They were awful and I hurt him."

Kuri-chan leaned back against the wall. "Ko-chan, I don't understand. Please tell me everything that happened!"

"I believe," Kyoko started when pieces of a puzzle finally came into place in her mind, "that he's a loner. People in the windows were bullying him, pretending to help him confess to me."

"You mean shouting stuff so he would be too embarrassed to go through with it?"

"Yeah."

"But he did anyway?"

"Yes, and he was so gentle," Kyoko whispered.

"Do you have any idea how much bravery that takes?"

Kyoko met her friend's eyes. She hadn't thought of that. "I feel so bad for him. He was crying when I left, but I was so angry."

"Angry because he confessed to you? You don't make any sense."

"No, he gave me a letter from Hamarugen-san to you, and I got so mad at him."

"Oh, Ko-chan! I told you that geek was bad news."

"I know. I tore the letter apart and threw it away. I'm sorry."

Kuri-chan smiled. "Don't worry. If he wants to confess to me he can do so directly instead of sending his friends."

"And if he does?" Kyoko still felt a bit jealous.

"The geek?"

"Yes."

"He'd better do something very special for me not to shoot him down to kingdom come." Kuri-chan grinned. "I hate people who can't run their own errands and hurt their messengers instead." Then Kyoko found herself in a warm embrace. "Let's see what we can do about that messenger of yours. If you want of course."

There was a slight tingling in her chest. Relief mostly but also something else. It was a bit embarrassing. Rather than answer Kuri-chan she changed the topic. "Something very special, you said?"