Chapter 182: A daring thought

Kyrie lets out a sigh of relief. For some time, he has believed that Phanes is dead. Before meeting the fairy queen, the clues about Phanes are indicating that she is really dead. 

"Where is she trapped?" Kyrie asks while looking at Imogen, slightly frowning.

"God realm. Inside the palace."

Seeing that Imogen has not known that the woman trapped there is Phanes, Kyrie assumes that Imogen might also not know why she is trapped. 

[Just what happened in the god realm? Why did Erebus suddenly get engaged with Vita? What about Phanes? Why did the king of gods die? Is Phanes only persecuted for possessing the right to inherit the throne? Erebus… What about Erebus? Why did he turn into a fallen god?]

"The only way to find out is to go to the god realm," Kyrie murmured.

[But how?]

Kyrie's conclusion has drawn the queen and Imogen's eyes to him. It is a very daring thought. However, it is not completely impossible since they are also entering the gates.

"Imogen, what is the success rate that you managed to regain enough power to achieve demi-godhood?"

Imogen grinds her teeth and speaks in between them, "Cockroach, you don't need to go to the god realm to make all this end. You just need to stop the loop and solve Ian's curse. Don't involve yourself in more than you already have."

Those words somehow manage to squeeze Kyrie's heart, "You crazy bitch! You perfectly know that the issues of this world do not just extend to solving what you have caused. The issues already existed before you came to this world. Stop running away, Imogen. You can't solve your problem with the same level of thinking that you used to create it."

The queen suddenly feels like she is in the middle of a heated argument. She backs her chair and takes her teacup in case the table collapses. 

Imogen growls her words, "What do you know to judge me?"

"Do you seriously think I am judging you?"

Their stares can soon spark and combust into infernal fire. Although Imogen feels such rage when facing Kyrie, at the same time, she cannot help but feel a different feeling inside. She would have killed people like him in a blink of an eye, but she has not done it. She knows she cannot do it either. She is not doing anything as she would usually do. 

Kyrie blinks hard, letting his eyes shut for a moment, and takes a deep breath to calm himself, "Imogen… Let's solve this together. The things of the god realm do not sound like something we can avoid. Instead of waiting around for situations to catch up to us, if we can influence the flow of events, then we should. After all, what blocks your path always becomes the way."

"Why do you always want to make things more difficult?"

"Because that is the path you take when your mind is set never to run away again."

---

Ian half-opens his eyes with most of his fatigue washed away. His arm swipes the spot next to him, and he feels a smooth cooling sensation of the bed covers. He jolts and flings his eyelids open. Kyrie is not next to him. 

He quickly paces around the room to look for Kyrie, but he finds nothing. He sends his shadows out to look for Kyrie. 

'Why did he leave on his own again?'

When one of his shadows reaches the greenhouse, he hears Kyrie's voice through the shadow. 

"Hmm? Ian?" Kyrie pokes at the miniature slime-like creature that Ian has created with his shadow.

Because Ian has split his own shadow into so many pieces, the shadow that reached Kyrie is tiny.

Kyrie chuckles and pats on the shadow's head, "Did you wake up? How was your sleep?"

Ian has remastered his dark magic so that the shadow can register anything with his five senses. Ian blushes a little, watching Kyrie resting his head on top of his palm. Kyrie smiles at the shadow, suddenly looking bashful, and blush circles appear on its cheeks. 

"I guess we will have to end our conversation here," The queen chuckles at their interaction while Imogen is still like a tower of ice.

"I think we have talked about everything that we need to cover."

The queen nods while giving a complicated gaze back to Kyrie. After partaking in the conversation between Kyrie and Imogen after her reveal, she is rather troubled. Kyrie notices and only smiles back. From that smile, the queen's feelings twist even harder. 

"I will give you the midnight queen as I have promised," Kyrie tries to change the mood between them.

The queen tries to relax her facial expression and nods, "Thank you…. I don't know if I can ever repay this grace."

"Queen Annora, this is a fair exchange between you and me. It has nothing to do with your debt to Phanes. I give the flower to you because I want to."

The queen senses a shiver running up her spine. Those words touch Queen Annora because what Kyrie meant is that she owes him nothing. For a sinner like her, her life has been crippled with guilt from her debt to Phanes. After that, she has not accepted anything from anyone because she is afraid that her debt will increase. However, those words ease her heart because she recognizes the nature of those words. 

'You should not water down kind intentions.'

Phanes's words echo in her soul. As if her chains have broken, she smiles at the Phanes in her memories. Phanes is still with that half-tied chestnut hair and emerald soft eyes, smiling back at her. Her oversize hooded cape flutters from the night breeze just like the first time they met.

'Annora,' Phanes calls her with a soft tone.

The queen keeps her bright smile on her face.

"Phanes," She whispers to herself. 

Her heart warms, remembering Phanes's voice that she thought she had forgotten.

The queen confidently faces Kyrie, "I will have to bother you later in the day then. My daughter is rather sick right now, so I want to let her rest a bit more."

Kyrie nods with a smile, "Yeah, that sounds good."

The shadow, half the size of Kyrie's hand, forms two arms by extending the matter from its body. Then, it wraps around Kyrie's fingers and tugs them, signaling Kyrie to go back to its owner.

The queen chuckles again at the cute interaction, "I guess someone wants you to go back."

"Is that so?" Kyrie looks at the shadow.

The shadow nods energetically. Since Kyrie has also finished talking to the queen and Imogen, he excuses himself and walks back to the bedroom. 

Opening the bedroom door, Kyrie finds an empty bedroom. Suddenly, an arm comes from the side and grabs him. Kyrie loses his balance and crashes onto Ian's chest. 

Feeling bad for leaving Ian when he is asleep, Kyrie lets Ian embrace him in silence. 

"I am not someone you can get rid of so easily," Kyrie chuckles, "You will find me even in the most absurd circumstances."

Ian releases his embrace and asks, "Did you figure out about Phanes?"

Kyrie hugs around Ian's waist, "Hm! I did!"

While Ian gets ready, Kyrie tells Ian what the queen has told him. When he finishes the story, Ian sits down next to him on the couch in deep thought.

"That means we are aiming to enter the god realm."

Kyrie nods at Ian's conclusion. Essence flows inside the gates, so if they want to enter the god realm, they need to gain demigod status by strengthening themselves inside the gates. 

"The queen says that she is willing to train me how to use Phanes's essence since the essence inside me has never acknowledged me as their owner."

"That is all good news, and we can also find Phanes. But…."

Ian lifts Kyrie's face, and a wrinkle appears in between his eyebrows, "Why do you look so pale?"

Kyrie laughs nervously to dissipate the serious atmosphere.

"I often try to adjust myself to new situations, but this time around is particularly hard. My heart is not as stable as before…. I am not sure if you have experienced this…."

Kyrie forcefully adjusts his facial expressions to prevent any contrasting expressions from coming out. His heart clashes against his rib cage, causing his chest to spasm in pain: his pupils quiver, and his body tenses with the sensation of cold chills pinching his skin.

Kyrie takes Ian's hands to comfort himself. Seeing that Kyrie wishes to get close to him, Ian pulls Kyrie toward him. 

"This is something I must find out by myself. After all, this is something that I struggle with internally."

"But at least, I wish to do something for you," Ian replies downcasted, "You have always managed to make me feel secure and loved, yet I am not able to do anything when you are in pain."

Kyrie shakes his head, "Ian… What is inside a person can only be managed by that person. Your ability to overcome wasn't my doing, but because you let yourself go through the change. One can only change when one is willing."

"What can I do for you then?".

"Stay by my side…. With you here with me, I have all the courage I need."

"Why do you only ask for this?"

"Because there is nowhere else I want to be but by your side. I want to be by your side for a long, long time."