20 I'd still love you

There was a clattering sound when Feng Yu's bow dropped to the ground. Now that all lay still he ran up to his goddess, who was nothing but a hideous mangled corpse. He ran to her side but paused at her feet, his throat dry and closed.

Was this the goddess he fell in love with? That lived with him on the mountainside, and laughed and stayed with him even when he turned into a frog.

Was this his Bai Qiaoyin? The most gentle and beautiful person he ever knew, who would chuckle and say, "Maybe I should ask the Heavens to turn me into a frog too, what do you think, Beloved? I would make such a cute little frog." And then she'd kiss him on the nose.

But that long silky hair was now just a gnarly matted mess. His fingers trembled as he knelt down by her side, reaching to touch the coarse black mess on her head. "My darling," he once said to her, "your hair is so beautiful and lovely. If you turned into a frog, don't you think it'd be a shame?"

Her laughter was like a summer breeze, warm and soft upon his ears, "Are you saying you only love me for my hair?" Her long, delicate fingers ran through her shiny ebony hair, eyes twinkling with a star-light glow.

"Even if you turned into a frog, I'd still love you," he had laughed with her then.

"And even though you turned into this, I still love you," he said to this decaying, ugly corpse.

He touched that hand, smooth skin turned into a dry wrinkly leather. Her eyes, sunken and lips cracked, once rosy, now gray. Anyone who knew the Bai Qiaoyin as a goddess with peerless beauty, would not recognize the monster that lay slain at Feng Yu's feet. But under the sheen of moonlight, he could still make out bits of her features; those fanning lashes and cute pointed nose, her thin neck, and peach-shaped jaw. And even if no one else could recognize this monster, she was still Feng Yu's Bai Qiaoyin.

His eyes clouded with tears. "I'm sorry, this is all my fault." He took that weathered hand into his and recalled her voice, her smile, and her eyes. Slowly, he bent down and kissed those lifeless lips.

Bai Qiaoyin's chest that had been torn to shreds and made into a dark bloody mess began to glow again. But this time, the shine was golden and pure.

"What…!" Yuan Xuelan exclaimed.

But he was quickly silenced by Chen Anyue, "Shh." She shook her head, quietly telling him to allow them to have their moment in peace.

The golden light that shined from Bai Qiaoyin's chest shook and grew until it enveloped her entire body. Her skin, gray and chapped regained a youthful glow. Her hair, tangled and coarse smoothed out into long beautiful black locks. Her sunken cheeks filled again. Dirty black robes transformed into a simple but clean pink dress.

Feng Yu was shocked but was soon overcome with emotion. His back hunched over as he clutched onto her body. "Qiaoyin, Qiaoyin," he begged, "please forgive me, I was useless. I didn't listen to you. I didn't do as you told."

Dark lashes fluttered open. Those soft, white arms raised and held him close, she rested her head upon his shoulder and chuckled, "Beloved? Is that you? Don't cry. I'm ok now so don't cry. I forgive you."

But he only sobbed into her harder, tears falling down onto her neck and shoulder. The golden glow that covered her entire body was wonderful and brilliant, but slowly it began to fade. And the beautiful and smiling Bai Qiaoyin became translucent, her form disappearing.

"I'm glad I got to see you, one last time," she sighed against Feng Yu's neck, her voice pleasant and peaceful.

And so Feng Yu cried in her arms for one last time. Cherishing the curve of her body beneath his hold, the scent of flowers in her hair and the lyrical tone of her voice. "Qiaoyin, Qiaoyin, I'm sorry," he couldn't help but say over and over again, the cruel blade of self-hatred carved away at his soul. "This is all my fault, it's all my fault."

She shushed him and pulled away, her smile was as splendid as the morning sun. "Beloved," she said, "don't be so sad, ok? There is nothing in my life I've ever regretted, and I wouldn't trade the life I had with you for anything in the world." A cold hand touched his face, wiping away the tears. When he reached up to hold that hand, his fingers only grasped at a specter, unable to be held.

"Beloved," she said, her voice turned wispy like wind, "One day, let's meet again." She leaned in, planting a final kiss on his lips before disappearing under the silver glow of moonlight.

Feng Yu knelt there and cried and cried. Until his youthful visage turned old and wrinkled, his black hair turned peppered, then white.

Chen Anyue's hands flew to her mouth in horror, watching Feng Yu age in years in just a moment. Her eyes were already moist from the tragedy that unfolded in front of her and she didn't know if her heart could take any more.

Yuan Xuelan shook his head, "Looks like the curse is lifting."

Feng Yu turned around, to meet the gazes of the cultivators one last time, now with the face of an old weathered man. He raised a shaking finger, pointing in the direction of the lake, chapped lips croaked out, "Under the…" but whatever else he hoped to say was lost, his body turning to dust.

They stood in silence, prayers offered to the departed. And aside from the wind and the rustling of grass and leaves, nothing else uttered a sound.

"Poor Feng Yu…" Chen Anyue sighed and shook her head, her heart overflowing with sympathy, tears threatening to pour out her eyes, praying sincerely that those two souls might one day cross paths again.

Liu Sumeng said nothing, feeling unsteady and heavy. Though his expression was unchanging his mind was a whirlwind of thoughts. He wondered if those two could really perhaps meet again? Or was that just a fleeting wish of a departing soul? When he really thought about it, he was overcome with a feeling of gratefulness, for he was blessed to be able to die and meet the one he wanted to see right away. He wasn't sure what he did to receive this blessing but Liu Sumeng swore that he was going to cherish it. He sighed. The wound on his shoulder throbbed and he was feeling a little light-headed.

Unlike the other two, Yuan Xuelan did not find himself moved. Though he was respectful and remained quiet. But his mind was focused on Feng Yu's final words. He looked back at the lake with downturned lips, wondering why that frog was pointing in its direction. Overcome with curiosity, he walked out to the pier and looked down at the water below.

Was there something down there? Maybe he should take a dive and find out.

"Liu-ge, are you ok?" Chen Anyue walked over, frowning at the wounds that decorated his arm. She looked at his face that was looking much paler than before.

Liu Sumeng shook his head, "I'll be ok." He still had that restorative pill hidden away. But he was reluctant to use it yet, feeling as though there was something missing with this sequence of events so far. There had to have been something else that deprived him of these memories of his previous life. He veered his gaze towards Yuan Xuelan and the mysterious lake.

But something else caught his attention, a glimmer of movement from the trees. He reacted on instinct, ignoring the bone-deep fatigue and numbing pain that plagued his body. Liu Sumeng ran forward, pushing a surprised Chen Anyue aside.

He raised his blade, barely deflecting a sword coming down towards Yuan Xuelan.

"...!" Liu Sumeng clenched his teeth, but his strength failed him and Mingshui fell out of his grasp. A mysterious figure stood before him, cloaked in black robes and a black butterfly mask. There was a silver bell strapped on the scabbard of a scimitar that Liu Sumeng couldn't help but find familiar.

"What-!" Yuan Xuelan gasped and cried, only then realizing something was off but he reacted too slowly and the man slid the sword through Liu Sumeng's stomach. There was a waft of peony and ginseng and Liu Sumeng instantly felt lightheaded. People were calling him, and he heard the sound of steel clashing and feet running. But his vision was already blurry, Liu Sumeng wasn't sure what was going on anymore.

"Liu-ge!"

"Damn you, Liu Sumeng!"

The scent of peony and ginseng became stronger and he could feel chills crawl up his spine, a dense coat of spiritual energy washed over him, threatening. Liu Sumeng, in the haze of his thoughts and spinning world, he remembered about that pill and with a shaky hand, fumbled for it. When he finally was able to take it out, someone else had to push the pill past his lips, because his consciousness was fast flickering away. He could have sworn he heard the sound of splashing water and someone yelling at him to stay awake.

Sorry, but he really couldn't stay awake.