110 Going nowhere

Liu Sumeng chased Chen Anyue out into the courtyard. She was in a rush, hiding her embarrassment and flustered face with a hurried pace. And though she knew she could hear the Ivory Sword Saint chase her steps, she dared not turn back.

She dared not have a glance and see his face.

"Where are you going?" She heard him ask.

The words spilled out in a fluster, "I…I just need some air." She was making it to the gate. The city was on the other side, an atmosphere full of festivities and things to distract her from her thoughts.

There was a long, stone-paved road that wound downward into the heart of the city. From the golden manor's lofty spot, the city of Reling at its feet was like a sparkling gem. Echoes of song trailed up like rising steam, dots of lantern light glowed in welcome.

In a trance, Chen Anyue went toward the lights and the sounds.

"It's late."

"...I'm a grown woman," she said stubbornly, thinking about all the times she wished to say those very words to her own father but didn't.

Liu Sumeng caught up to her side. This time he accompanied her in silence.

In the belly of the city there was the waft of street food, greasy and fragrant.

A mess of ugly thoughts churned in Chen Anyue's heart. She didn't know who she was most frustrated at. This stony-faced fiance of hers, who rejected her while treating her so sweetly, or maybe her precious little Shidi who desired the man who was promised to her.

Or herself, for having these mean thoughts in the first place.

Never had she been in such conflict with her own feelings before. Not even her frustration with her family's overbearing nature came even close to the vivid emotions that flared so loudly in her heart, refusing to quell.

Her eyes looked at noodles being cooked on a flat heated stone. She never even tried such a thing before. Her brothers would scold her for craving oily foods.

"Do you think me pitiful?" She dared not look up at the person who stood silently at her side.

"No."

'Do you like me more now?' But she didn't dare ask that. Not this time, not after…

And Chen Anyue hated herself for feeling angry at Yuan Xuelan. Why did he have to like the man who she was trying desperately to win? And was she a villain for wanting him?

...and who did Liu Sumeng like more?

This question she was fearful of asking. And she didn't know what she was afraid of more; Liu Sumeng's answer, or her own reaction to the answer.

"Liu-ge," she said, tilting her voice to be a little playful. "I want one of those." She pointed to one of the fried cake stalls. Perhaps she was behaving a little childishly, but after seeing her own Shidi kiss her fiance, could she really be blamed?

"..." Liu Sumeng was quiet but obedient. He pulled out his coin pouch and bought her one of the fried cakes.

For the first time in her life, she took a bite out of the sweet, greasy thing. The red bean filling was sharp with the amount of added sugar. The crumbs tickled her mouth as flavor exploded. It was so sweet!

Inspiration took hold of her and she decided that today she would let her vices be. There were so many things she had dared not try before.

"Liu-ge," she said with a honeyed voice, "There is somewhere I want to go."

Liu Sumeng was so kind to her. He nodded and followed her whims. They found themselves at a rowdy inn.

There were men screaming and shouting with red faces. The waiters and waitresses were equally as loud, shoving, and elbowing their way through just to deliver drinks and meals to the cramped customers.

It seemed that there was a game of yanqian [1]in the middle. People threw down bets as the croupier sorted the beans with a long bamboo stalk.

Chen Anyue and Liu Sumeng were sorely out of place. The smell was extremely thick from both food and sweat. These two refined cultivators stood out like a sore thumb. But to anyone that dared even chance a look at her, Liu Sumeng gave them an icy glare, warning them to back away.

No one was drunk enough yet to start a fight with this refined young master and he prayed that no one would be a fool too. Liu Sumeng had no idea why Anyue brought him to such a place. But for now, he would do what he could to please her.

The truth was, the Ivory Sword Saint was also at a complete loss. He did not understand what had happened. Had he made a mistake? Or was it Xuelan the one making the mistake? The sensation still tingled on his lips. Both warmth and anxiety swarmed in his heart.

At first, he had only wished to follow Chen Anyue to make sure that she didn't misunderstand. But he wasn't sure what it was that was to be misunderstood, or what the reality of the situation even was.

The master of the inn was wiping his face with sweat. His complexion seemed poor as he looked upon the young miss and young master that have just entered his establishment. "P-Please wait just a moment! I will get a table for you!" He looked over as a young boy and barked, "You! Go get a table right at this moment, I don't care if you have to throw people out!"

On a normal day, Chen Anyue would have shaken her head and told them that it was okay, and they could wait. But today was different. And she only waited, feeling giddy and a bit evil as a table was cleared just for their sake.

"What can I get for Young Master and Young Miss?" The master of the inn bowed to them and smiled in a way that told of both nerves and greed.

Chen Anyue already had dinner and the fried cake that only had a few more bites left so she was not too hungry. So she looked at Liu Sumeng who sat in front of her. The Ivory Sword Saint looked extremely out of place in the noisy and dirty inn with his white robes and calm refined visage. It was truly a sight to behold, she chuckled to herself.

There was still that gripping anxiety in her belly but she ignored it with a smile, "Is there anything you would like, Liu-gege[2]?"

Liu-gege did not react very quickly. He eventually shook his head and said, "No, I'm good. Order what you please."

"Okay," she turned to the waiter with mischief in her eyes, "Then let's get twenty jugs of your best wine!"

She couldn't help but giggle at the way his jaw seemed to fall to the floor.

Feeling exceptionally brazen and delirious she even slapped money on the table and grinned, "You may keep the change."

The master of the inn grappled the money with nervous little movements, bowing and stuttering, "Of course, of course. Thank you, thank you." And scurried off like an excited little shrew.

Though she was grinning from ear to ear, Liu Sumeng was not a fool not to realize that Anyue's odd mood was brought about by her anxiety.

"Anyue-" he said, only to be cut off.

"Oh! A-Zhang does some really strange things sometimes, doesn't he?" She said with a sigh, only to continue quickly, stopping him from cutting her off, "Please don't take him too seriously. I understand that sometimes his personality can be a little bit…Well, you should know."

"Anyue," he said more sternly. But was interrupted when the jugs of wine came and filled up the space around their table. She laughed exceptionally loud and even exchanged extra words with the waiter. She was purposely refusing to meet his gaze.

And when the waiter finally left, she once again spoke before he could say anything, "Liu-gege, is it true that you've never been properly drunk before? Perhaps it's a little brazen of me to challenge the Ivory Sword Saint on my first venture with alcohol but…Liu-gege will keep me safe, right?"

He despised raising his voice against her but there was no choice, "Anyue!"

She froze, eyes going wide. "I'm sorry, I did not mean to upset you." She pushed a nonexistent loose strand of hair behind her ear. Her hands were even shaking as she reached for the nearest jug of wine. "Let's just drink."

"Stop this. You know it's going nowhere." Liu Sumeng finally said.

But Chen Anyue was still pouring them both a cup. Her gaze pointedly downward. She said nothing and only wore a strained smile on her face, eyes glassy.

He hated seeing her cry. But he realized now that he had made the mistake of letting this last for as long as he did. "We need to put an end to this."

Behind them, the roar of laughing and screaming men echoed. And despite the invasion of sights and sounds the two of them were wrapped up in their own bubble, trapped in by awkward tension.

Her voice came out trembling, "Are you…unhappy with me? Is it because of A-Zhang? Are you…"

Not interested in women?

The last part was unsaid, for Chen Anyue was too fearful of the answer.

She couldn't admit that she had lost…to A-Zhang, because of a reason like this. It was only then she was made to realize her own shameless ego, the silent self-confidence that she had in her own appearance and charm.

"I am not unhappy with you." Liu Sumeng sighed, but still accepted the cup of wine handed to him. "But this will not work out. There is no happy ending for us. I do not want to cause anyone trouble."

Why was it that when the Ivory Sword Saint managed to speak more than a few blunt words, he was still painfully cryptic and difficult to understand? She scrunched up her brows in frustration. The alcohol under her fingertips was looking more alluring by the second. "Then…"

"We will abolish the promise to join hands. Do not think too badly of me. If you cannot bear the sight of me, then I understand."

How could he be so calm? Quietly, she cursed him in her heart. And bit back a sniffle that threatened to undo her composure. Instead of responding, she simply took the cup of wine and chugged down the contents in one go! The sharp burn of alcohol burned down her throat and her shoulders trembled to keep her face straight as she poured herself another one.

"Anyue?" Liu Sumeng said hesitantly. But he did not stop her in time.

…

Chen Anyue did not know how she made it home. But after finishing another cup of water, only to empty out the contents of her stomach in her chamber pot did she realize that she had somehow, magically made it home.

A sudden wave of indescribable emotion overcame her and she wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.

She hiccuped, catching sight of the wooden idol of some unnamed god standing vigil at her bedside. It was a strange trinket forced upon her by her eldest brother. "You're all I truly have," she slurred at it.

She felt ridiculous. But there was no one watching her now, not the drunken men at the inn or the terribly infuriating Ivory Sword Saint. Caught by a wave of alcohol-induced foolishness, she pressed her palms in prayer and lowered her head at the odd wooden idol.

She didn't know what it was she was praying for. But she did it nonetheless.

[1] Also known as fantan, is a gambling game where beans or coins are sorted and you guess the number of beans that will remain...something like that.

[2] Anyue changes her form of address from Liu-ge to Liu-gege to sound cute