ZAYN
For the first time in years, I didn't feel like attending school. After the alarm went off at 5:30 a.m., I slept for an hour until responsibility jerked me into waking. As usual, my house was dark and a loud silence echoed from each corner of my room.
In my boxer shorts, I went to the bathroom and then to the kitchen to make myself some breakfast. Why did I feel so depressed?
This wasn't the first time I was alone. Heck, this was my life now. Lonely. Dark.
I neither had parents nor people I could actually call my friends. Some would argue that Anas and Zeesh were my best friends. They clearly didn't know that the only thing in common between us three was our imperfections.
People saw us and assumed things. I didn't have anything in my heart for them. Leia was my only true friend. The only person in my life that I loved and trusted. I wanted to laugh. I still loved and trusted her.
I love him. Her words rang in my ears, making me tightly grip my mug.
God, how could this be my life?
The only person that I cared for was the one I couldn't have. Maybe I was just being too much. My anxiety was seriously kicking in. I hated days like these the most. Days where I felt nothing at all. Like a huge part of my soul was missing.
I longed for something great. I didn't understand what. It was like my heart didn't want to be in my chest but somewhere else. Like it had found a deep connection with something and missed it.
I got out my pills from the cupboard and swallowed them all with one gulp of water.
The day began and carried on at an excruciatingly slow speed. There was just something about that day that didn't seem right. Something was off. I just didn't know what.
Anas and Zeesh eyed me with suspicion—obviously not used to me ever being late. I waved off their questions and did my own work.
"So," Anas started. "There's a rumour circulating around school."
Now what? "Go on,"
"Someone saw Leia—" I visibly flinched at her name. "—in the restaurant we went to yesterday. She was with a guy. Can you believe it?"
I glared at him.
He continued, "You're clearly not doing anything to pull her into your trap. Have you quit the bet, Zayn?"
The fact that he would talk about Leia like that had my blood boiling. I sat up in my chair and pointed the pen at him. "To hell with you and your bet, Anas. I'm not doing this to her."
He genuinely looked surprised. Any trace of that shark grin fell from his face. "Are you kidding me?"
I snuck in a quick breath and decided he wasn't worth a reply. I went on to type things in my laptop, trying hard not to think about Leia.
That's when a knock sounded on the door. I looked at the clock above. 7:00. The principal wouldn't come to check up on us for about an hour. Then who the hell was disturbing me? Well, technically there were three of us sitting here but those two were basically invisible to me.
I looked at Zeesh from out of the corner of my eye. He was smoking something. I hoped it wasn't weed. Didn't smell like it, but who knew?
"What?" He drawled out to me.
"Open the door,"
He scoffed, getting super comfy on the sofa. "You do it."
Before I could bark out a reply, Anas said, "Zeesh, you're the closest to it. Remember I brought you water from my house that day? I had to walk miles to go to the kitchen."
Zeesh said, "Wow. You guys are unbelievable." And thankfully got up before that impatient person could knock some more.
I clicked my tongue in exasperation because for some reason the internet decided it wasn't going to work. I clicked the keys over and over again as if it was somehow their fault.
Also, why was the room so damn silent?
I looked up from the screen and everything inside of me halted.