Chapter 18: nightmare

He tilted his head while looking at my reaction, "why are you afraid, your highness, and what happened to your neck?"

"Nothing lord, Killian, as I was saying I want to improve my relationship with you," I said again, without using the word which brought danger vibes from him.

In fact, it was better, let's not think about being a mother, when I didn't even know how to be one. Let's improve our relationship. If that could also help me in living a good life, the deal was fair enough.

I nodded at the thought of it.

But his aura of suspicion remained. 'See just like his father, he also needs assurance again and again'

I paused to give him some time to ponder over my words. I still had six years in his coming to age ceremony, when he would be announced as the next duke by Cassius.

I didn't even know if he really wanted to make Killian duke this early or had he done this just to spite me!

'Focus Marianne focus' i took the glass of water and drank it in a gulp. I was surprised. As he looked at me with curious eyes.

And to my utter surprise, I did what even a real mother had never done to his child. Looking at his big eyes, I winked at him.

And oh god! What an expression I saw, his eyes wide and his mouth agape.

He was looking at me like I had two heads. Or I breathed fire like a dragon. I wanted to laugh so hard at his childish face but I controlled, in case he felt offended.

But trust me it took every nerve of my body to stop it. I bit my lips to keep myself calm.

It took him a few moments to go back in his shell again, turning the same cold stoic boy. This expression did not suit him at all.

'Would he also be influenced by the trick I use on Kate?' I mused but let it go.

I had already tested enough water for tonight. In the greed of a little more, I might drown.

So I took a deep breath and turned into the same calm and serene duchess he knew.

"I know lord Killian, you may be suspicious of me now, but you will realize it eventually. I can even swear upon my family's name if you want the assurance" I spoke calmly.

And it should work on him as I had never sworn in front of him. In fact I could count the number of times we had talked in the past on my fingers.

"Very well, your highness, I understand" he spoke slowly.

'Then what's with the tone?' I wanted to rebuke him so much. Did he think I am a two-year-old child who would believe him, just because he said so?'

I bit my lip at my own words. He must be thinking the same. Why would he believe just because I said so?

'Very well lord Killian I will make you believe then'

One thing that was embedded on my bone was never to give up. In the past, I never gave up on Cassius, and in this life, I would never give up on you.

And the first step would be to change the result of the royal party. With that thought, I spoke again.

"So lord Killian, would you come with me to a royal tea party?"

But before he could reply the door knocked and in came the voice of Lina.

"Your highness"

"Not now Lina" I cut the girl while looking anticipated at Killian who was still pondering over my words.

But the door knocked again, increasing my annoyance. 'Had this girl finally gone mad? Blatantly ignoring my command. Didn't she know she could go to prison for that'

"Lina I said not…"

But before I could continue the door swung open with a bam, and in came the nightmare of my life.

My face turned hard and cold, my eyes that were shining so brightly just a moment ago were hollow now.

Even Killian who was known for his calm attitude in every situation was surprised to see so many changes in me.

He looked at his father then at me, then he stood up, but before he could take a further step I held his hand.

He looked at me and spoke "your highness" but I just shook my head.

And then bowed to the man whom I hate with every nerve of mine,

"His highness, welcome to the duchess chamber"

He raised a brow at my action but said nothing.

Since I was holding Killian's hand he couldn't go to welcome him anymore so he also bowed, more further than I did, but I didn't care anymore.

"His highness"

He just nodded at both of us, and sat there uninvited AGAIN!

He was just getting better at it.

Ten minutes had passed but none of us spoke, I was eating my dessert like he wasn't even there.

'Well it's not my mistake that he isn't eating as Norma had given her the same, in fact much large piece of dessert if I compare'

But I won't be that petty!

Killian also had a fork in his hand, but like his father, he wasn't also eating.

He was just sitting there like a statue,

'Poor boy, I understand my cruelty as I wasn't his mother, but what about Cassius? Shouldn't he behave a bit more warmly towards his only son'

Finally I couldn't bear any more.