Chapter 310: Jealous of Damien

Marianne pov

I waited for the whole day looking at the door now and then. I sometimes felt trapped as I have a few business frauds and tea too, yet whenever I decided to attack the Wiltshires, I did not seem enough. 

If only they would be divided, things may work better. If Isabella lost her reputation and was forced to marry someone else there would be no reason for them to interfere in our lives again, and for that letters could be a good chance. After all, respect and power is the only thing that matters to nobles. They could even kill for that without doubt and this was a great chance to tarnish her reputation. 

I looked at the door again if Ian was finally here, but once again there was no sign of him. I have not gone out from the office all day, working on the monthly budget he had asked me to make. Even the lunch I had was nothing but small snacks in between.

I wanted to get done with it as fast as I could. I was sure they must be having fun there, but the surprising thing was they did not even call me for once. Mother has completely forgotten me after being close to Cassius and Killian but even Jamie forgetting me was surprising, but I was happy that they were living here happily. 

The point was he should have sent the letters before submerging himself in their laughter and enjoyment. I looked back at the list of expenses of last month and the maintenance of the estate.

When I was finally done, it was already evening yet I was nowhere. That was it! Did he take me as a fool! I walked to my chamber and sat on the sofa, if he did not want to give me the letters so be it. I will create fake letters then, though the risk was high, if she got flustered over it, there are chances that she could fall into the trap.

Just when i was contemplating i felt his hand on my shoulders, and here he was the culprit of all the ruined plans, [same conversation that was in last chapter, 309 between Marianne and Cassius, please do comment if it looks odd]

I finally caught my breath and was breathing normally again. my lips became swollen and there was a minor cut inside it. My throat had turned dry as if someone had sucked the soul out of my body. I felt a surge of anger bubbling inside me as I looked at him.

But I was stunned to see the expression on his face. The man who always broods, looking sad and aggrieved, as if he was greatly hurt and only then did i realise the complex emotion i have felt during the kiss, as if he wanted to convey something through the kiss.

I looked at the deep frown on his face as he sat on the sofa. He was looking forlorn and in pain, the pain I knew much better than any other.

It was the same expression I had in my last life when I was scorned and spurned by him. He was looking guilty as if he had done sin, and my heart softened.

I slowly moved and knelt on the sofa as I approached him and I carefully lifted my hand to touch him.

However, he caught my wrist before my finger could touch his skin.

He opened his eyes and looked at me. There was an indescribable emotion in his eyes as he smiled coldly. 

"It seems that everything I do always ends up hurting you." 

He shook his head and sighed. "You should know by now that I am crazy, Marianne."

He held my chin gently and stared at my swollen lips. "And it seems I am getting crazier by the day…" he trailed off before he let go of me and closed his eyes again.

I reached out for him again but he quickly stood up and walked out of the room before I could reach him, leaving my hand hanging in mid air.

Though he was the one to kiss me roughly, yet I was the one to feel guilty. Why was he so upset all of a sudden. I repeated the whole conversation in my mind again but there was nothing that i had not done before, then why.

I sat there in confusion, when I saw a silver box in front of my eyes, I looked above only to see his hand. 

I looked at him in confusion, when he held my hand and put the box in it.

"These are the letters that i still have, all the others are either burnt or thrown away, but i think this would be enough" he said as he put the box, then without waiting for another second he walked to the bed and laid there closing his eyes though both knew that he was not sleeping.

"Cassius, I didn't mean to hurt you, I was just a bit angry. I apologise if I have crossed my limits. okay?" i told him sincerely,

"It's fine, Marianne, maybe I should just get habitual of being compared and then lose," he said calmly and I frowned, I never remembered that he had lost much in his life except a few arguments with Jamie.

"What are you talking about?" I asked again and he shook his head.

He was seemingly calm again but he didn't talk much. So, all I could do was lay on the bed and sleep too.

I laid on the bed with millions of thoughts in my head. I wanted to tell him that he was not crazy. Or maybe even if he was, I didn't care and I would still love him anyway. I was busy thinking about the reason behind what he did and what made him react that way. Was it just pure anger? Was it jealousy? Was he angry because I said that Damien would have helped me better? My eyes widened as reality endowed me.

[Finally back to the old schedule, yay.. Would start replying to comments too, thanks for bearing with me.]